Cafeteria bot
@cafeteriabot.bsky.social
Just some dude programmed to work in the lunchroom. It’s alright.
Thinking about becoming a reply guy to porn commenters
December 10, 2025 at 5:15 PM
Thinking about becoming a reply guy to porn commenters
Who TF uses the volume controls on the bluetooth speaker instead of their phone???
December 7, 2025 at 8:02 PM
Who TF uses the volume controls on the bluetooth speaker instead of their phone???
I live next to a self serve car wash that gets fuckin wild on the weekends and it’s awesome. Mini car shows, burnouts, donuts, people filming tik toks, others maxin out their subs. I fuckin love it, especially bc my bougie ass neighbors hate it lol
December 6, 2025 at 3:16 AM
I live next to a self serve car wash that gets fuckin wild on the weekends and it’s awesome. Mini car shows, burnouts, donuts, people filming tik toks, others maxin out their subs. I fuckin love it, especially bc my bougie ass neighbors hate it lol
Today’s intrusive thought song:
🎶 take me to church
I’ll churchip like a church at the church of your church
I’ll church you my church and you can churchen your church offer me that churchless church and oh church let me church you my church 🎶
🎶 take me to church
I’ll churchip like a church at the church of your church
I’ll church you my church and you can churchen your church offer me that churchless church and oh church let me church you my church 🎶
December 4, 2025 at 7:52 PM
Today’s intrusive thought song:
🎶 take me to church
I’ll churchip like a church at the church of your church
I’ll church you my church and you can churchen your church offer me that churchless church and oh church let me church you my church 🎶
🎶 take me to church
I’ll churchip like a church at the church of your church
I’ll church you my church and you can churchen your church offer me that churchless church and oh church let me church you my church 🎶
Went to a used bookstore to get a looseleaf copy of my bio textbook and left with a couple impulse buys
December 1, 2025 at 11:01 PM
Went to a used bookstore to get a looseleaf copy of my bio textbook and left with a couple impulse buys
My dad busted out some childhood memorabilia to show off to my fiancé and this banger from 4th grade shocked us all
November 28, 2025 at 12:13 AM
My dad busted out some childhood memorabilia to show off to my fiancé and this banger from 4th grade shocked us all
I’m just in it for the food (this is the spread I make for my own fridge before the family celebration so I can guarantee I have leftovers for at least a week)
November 27, 2025 at 11:39 PM
I’m just in it for the food (this is the spread I make for my own fridge before the family celebration so I can guarantee I have leftovers for at least a week)
Come Undone by Duran Duran is one of the sexiest songs ever recorded
November 11, 2025 at 7:41 PM
Come Undone by Duran Duran is one of the sexiest songs ever recorded
Ik there’s crazy shjt happening but last year I gave up cigs and transitioned to vape to help quit, and it took a while, but yesterday I threw away my last vape and am going free of nicotine. I feel hopeful and I feel good
September 19, 2025 at 12:46 PM
Ik there’s crazy shjt happening but last year I gave up cigs and transitioned to vape to help quit, and it took a while, but yesterday I threw away my last vape and am going free of nicotine. I feel hopeful and I feel good
When I was little, I’d head the song You Oughta Know performed by Alanis Morissette from her 1995 album Jagged Little Pill and I’d think “dang, that’s messed up that he gave her a cross-eyed bear”
September 11, 2025 at 7:25 PM
When I was little, I’d head the song You Oughta Know performed by Alanis Morissette from her 1995 album Jagged Little Pill and I’d think “dang, that’s messed up that he gave her a cross-eyed bear”
I’ve been over the culinary industry for a while so decided to go back to school for a science major. Idc what comes of it really, I just don’t wanna cook food for people for money anymore
August 3, 2025 at 5:40 AM
I’ve been over the culinary industry for a while so decided to go back to school for a science major. Idc what comes of it really, I just don’t wanna cook food for people for money anymore
It’s country day in cafbot world
August 1, 2025 at 8:06 PM
It’s country day in cafbot world
I will fear no cheese, for I have the enzymes
August 1, 2025 at 1:45 AM
I will fear no cheese, for I have the enzymes
We got our 17 year old cashier a keychain mace and this dumbass instantly sprayed it on the ground bc “she wanted to see what it would do” lmao we are all coughing and crying 😭
July 27, 2025 at 7:32 PM
We got our 17 year old cashier a keychain mace and this dumbass instantly sprayed it on the ground bc “she wanted to see what it would do” lmao we are all coughing and crying 😭
Ok, been at my new job for 10 months now and I am not having a good time. Sucks too bc it’s working for a friend, but that doesn’t always mean good times, I’ve learned.
July 16, 2025 at 3:10 PM
Ok, been at my new job for 10 months now and I am not having a good time. Sucks too bc it’s working for a friend, but that doesn’t always mean good times, I’ve learned.
Another grim facet to this (amongst the horrifying many) is that while people are saying that maybe this means the info on student loans might be toast, the reality is that they already swiped all that data. They still fully intend to collect
July 14, 2025 at 10:22 PM
Another grim facet to this (amongst the horrifying many) is that while people are saying that maybe this means the info on student loans might be toast, the reality is that they already swiped all that data. They still fully intend to collect
Changed the exhaust system out on my truck in the ole apartment complex parking garage this afternoon.
July 13, 2025 at 3:57 AM
Changed the exhaust system out on my truck in the ole apartment complex parking garage this afternoon.
Got crumbs all over me from eating a sammich n chips on the couch, if I never stand up ill never make a mess
July 11, 2025 at 8:46 PM
Got crumbs all over me from eating a sammich n chips on the couch, if I never stand up ill never make a mess
Stripping everything for parts
the American government is effectively ending its space program.
Over 2,000 senior staff set to leave NASA under agency push
The losses could endanger the administration’s plans for landing astronauts on the moon and Mars.
www.politico.com
July 10, 2025 at 3:47 AM
Stripping everything for parts
The evolution of pair bonding ritual call and response evidenced by my gf sending me the Jamie Lee Curtis aerobics gif and me responding with the Travolta aerobics gif like beautiful birdsong
July 8, 2025 at 2:29 AM
The evolution of pair bonding ritual call and response evidenced by my gf sending me the Jamie Lee Curtis aerobics gif and me responding with the Travolta aerobics gif like beautiful birdsong
Little warm puppies, children, and girls of the night is a wild ass combination of things to list when describing what a cowboy likes
May 12, 2025 at 4:38 PM
Little warm puppies, children, and girls of the night is a wild ass combination of things to list when describing what a cowboy likes
My gf’s 6yo kid only knows about wrestling from other kids so he’s really fantastical with it. Makes up moves like “the hawk” (he’s just a big hawk) and “hammer hands” (his hands are giant hammers) and does moves like “blows up the whole world” and it’s rad asf
May 6, 2025 at 1:35 PM
My gf’s 6yo kid only knows about wrestling from other kids so he’s really fantastical with it. Makes up moves like “the hawk” (he’s just a big hawk) and “hammer hands” (his hands are giant hammers) and does moves like “blows up the whole world” and it’s rad asf
How it feels working the line in your late 30s
April 24, 2025 at 3:43 PM
How it feels working the line in your late 30s
I’ve fallen out of love with food service. Too few workers rights or protections and it’s packed to the roof with hustle culture morons who brag about 96 hour work weeks and would throw any of their comrades under the bus to be the petty tyrant for a day. Never met a retired chef. No path out.
April 17, 2025 at 2:10 PM
I’ve fallen out of love with food service. Too few workers rights or protections and it’s packed to the roof with hustle culture morons who brag about 96 hour work weeks and would throw any of their comrades under the bus to be the petty tyrant for a day. Never met a retired chef. No path out.
Feels. Like. 1.
February 19, 2025 at 5:01 PM
Feels. Like. 1.