Lisa Davis
@bylisadavis.bsky.social
Read my weekly humor column at https://lisadavis.substack.com/
When she was 8, my daughter made me a Christmas sweater. Don't you dare call it 'ugly'
lisadavis.substack.com/p/in-my-holi...
lisadavis.substack.com/p/in-my-holi...
December 19, 2025 at 11:53 PM
When she was 8, my daughter made me a Christmas sweater. Don't you dare call it 'ugly'
lisadavis.substack.com/p/in-my-holi...
lisadavis.substack.com/p/in-my-holi...
The story of Rudolph was turned into a song and made famous by which artist?
A. Gene Autry
B. Dean Martin
C. Burl Ives
D. Tiny Tim
The rest of my holiday trivia quiz is here: lisadavis.substack.com/p/want-to-pl...
A. Gene Autry
B. Dean Martin
C. Burl Ives
D. Tiny Tim
The rest of my holiday trivia quiz is here: lisadavis.substack.com/p/want-to-pl...
Want to play a reindeer game?
A holiday trivia quiz
lisadavis.substack.com
December 12, 2025 at 1:59 PM
The story of Rudolph was turned into a song and made famous by which artist?
A. Gene Autry
B. Dean Martin
C. Burl Ives
D. Tiny Tim
The rest of my holiday trivia quiz is here: lisadavis.substack.com/p/want-to-pl...
A. Gene Autry
B. Dean Martin
C. Burl Ives
D. Tiny Tim
The rest of my holiday trivia quiz is here: lisadavis.substack.com/p/want-to-pl...
What color exactly is “soft”? You’d think “daylight” would be warm and yellow, like the sun. But no. The warm, yellow one is “soft white.” “Daylight” is like you’re lying in an operating room. lisadavis.substack.com/p/light-bulb...
Light bulb jokes
It helps to be bright when buying new light bulbs
lisadavis.substack.com
December 6, 2025 at 2:20 AM
What color exactly is “soft”? You’d think “daylight” would be warm and yellow, like the sun. But no. The warm, yellow one is “soft white.” “Daylight” is like you’re lying in an operating room. lisadavis.substack.com/p/light-bulb...
Kitten vs. Christmas (What if I wrapped all the decorations in bubble wrap?) lisadavis.substack.com/p/kitten-vs-...
Kitten vs. Christmas
What if I wrapped all the decorations in bubble wrap?
lisadavis.substack.com
November 21, 2025 at 5:36 PM
Kitten vs. Christmas (What if I wrapped all the decorations in bubble wrap?) lisadavis.substack.com/p/kitten-vs-...
These bugs are considered voracious predators. Not demure. Not ladylike. lisadavis.substack.com/p/thats-no-l...
That’s no lady bug …
That’s a rude, mean, stinky bug
lisadavis.substack.com
November 14, 2025 at 9:24 PM
These bugs are considered voracious predators. Not demure. Not ladylike. lisadavis.substack.com/p/thats-no-l...
Why is 7 lucky? Why is 13 unlucky? Your questions answered here lisadavis.substack.com/p/the-number...
The numbers game
If 7 is lucky and 13 is unlucky, then what's a googolplex?
lisadavis.substack.com
November 7, 2025 at 1:16 PM
Why is 7 lucky? Why is 13 unlucky? Your questions answered here lisadavis.substack.com/p/the-number...
The last time I attempted to draw a bird was in a high-school art class. I was trying to draw a white bird flying against a black background. I titled it “UFO,” because it really wasn’t identifiable as a bird. lisadavis.substack.com/p/for-the-bi...
For the birds
In which I attempt to draw a duck
lisadavis.substack.com
October 31, 2025 at 9:34 PM
The last time I attempted to draw a bird was in a high-school art class. I was trying to draw a white bird flying against a black background. I titled it “UFO,” because it really wasn’t identifiable as a bird. lisadavis.substack.com/p/for-the-bi...
Every year, I run a Halloween story contest for kids for our local newspaper. It’s called Ghostwriters, and every year I get to read through hundreds of entries. It’s a fascinating glimpse into what Generation Alpha is scared of, or obsessed with. lisadavis.substack.com/p/what-evil-...
What evil lurks in the minds of kids?
Clowns. Serial killers. Strangers in vans. Brainrots.
lisadavis.substack.com
October 28, 2025 at 10:35 PM
Every year, I run a Halloween story contest for kids for our local newspaper. It’s called Ghostwriters, and every year I get to read through hundreds of entries. It’s a fascinating glimpse into what Generation Alpha is scared of, or obsessed with. lisadavis.substack.com/p/what-evil-...
What is Jason’s full name in the Friday the 13th movies?
A. Jason Statham
B. Jason Momoa
C. Jason Vorhees
D. Jason Aldean
Take the rest of my horror movie quiz here: lisadavis.substack.com/p/horrors-a-...
A. Jason Statham
B. Jason Momoa
C. Jason Vorhees
D. Jason Aldean
Take the rest of my horror movie quiz here: lisadavis.substack.com/p/horrors-a-...
Horrors! A trivia quiz!
Oooo, this is gonna be scary, kids
lisadavis.substack.com
October 17, 2025 at 1:37 PM
What is Jason’s full name in the Friday the 13th movies?
A. Jason Statham
B. Jason Momoa
C. Jason Vorhees
D. Jason Aldean
Take the rest of my horror movie quiz here: lisadavis.substack.com/p/horrors-a-...
A. Jason Statham
B. Jason Momoa
C. Jason Vorhees
D. Jason Aldean
Take the rest of my horror movie quiz here: lisadavis.substack.com/p/horrors-a-...
This year’s most popular costumes, according to Spirit Halloween, are the pop stars from “KPop Demon Hunters,” the witches from “Wicked” and the superheroes from “Fantastic Four.” I’m very curious to see how they’ve made an Invisible Woman costume.
lisadavis.substack.com/p/boo-who
lisadavis.substack.com/p/boo-who
Boo who?
In this year's Halloween news: Skeleton mermaids, glowing candies, slasher sodas
lisadavis.substack.com
October 10, 2025 at 10:19 PM
This year’s most popular costumes, according to Spirit Halloween, are the pop stars from “KPop Demon Hunters,” the witches from “Wicked” and the superheroes from “Fantastic Four.” I’m very curious to see how they’ve made an Invisible Woman costume.
lisadavis.substack.com/p/boo-who
lisadavis.substack.com/p/boo-who
Who is McCoy and why is he the real one? Let's play the Name Game
lisadavis.substack.com/p/the-name-g...
lisadavis.substack.com/p/the-name-g...
The name game
Geez Louise, there are a lot of weird sayings about names
lisadavis.substack.com
October 3, 2025 at 7:50 PM
Who is McCoy and why is he the real one? Let's play the Name Game
lisadavis.substack.com/p/the-name-g...
lisadavis.substack.com/p/the-name-g...
If you’re the sort who can appreciate the artistry involved in weaving old hubcaps into a sculpture that reaches toward heaven, Paradise Garden is awe-inspiring. This place radiates with the energy of the spirit who made it. lisadavis.substack.com/p/eye-of-the...
Eye of the beholder
I found folk-art heaven at Paradise Garden
lisadavis.substack.com
September 26, 2025 at 7:43 PM
If you’re the sort who can appreciate the artistry involved in weaving old hubcaps into a sculpture that reaches toward heaven, Paradise Garden is awe-inspiring. This place radiates with the energy of the spirit who made it. lisadavis.substack.com/p/eye-of-the...
People have been using their fingers to remember things for thousands of years. A drawing from 8th-century China illustrated how to use one’s fingers to remember the 10 virtues of Buddhism. lisadavis.substack.com/p/put-a-stri...
Put a string on it
Need to remember something? Use your finger ... no, not that finger.
lisadavis.substack.com
September 19, 2025 at 4:25 PM
People have been using their fingers to remember things for thousands of years. A drawing from 8th-century China illustrated how to use one’s fingers to remember the 10 virtues of Buddhism. lisadavis.substack.com/p/put-a-stri...
A “mondegreen” is a misheard version of a song lyric — misheard in a way that sort of makes sense and is usually more entertaining. lisadavis.substack.com/p/hold-me-cl...
Hold me closer, Tony Danza
At least I think that’s what Elton John was singing about
lisadavis.substack.com
September 12, 2025 at 3:42 PM
A “mondegreen” is a misheard version of a song lyric — misheard in a way that sort of makes sense and is usually more entertaining. lisadavis.substack.com/p/hold-me-cl...
#Muscadines, for those unfamiliar with the fruit, are barely domesticated grapes, with tough, rubbery skins and unpleasant, spiky little seeds. lisadavis.substack.com/p/grape-ball...
Grape balls of fire
It's not easy to eat a muscadine.
lisadavis.substack.com
September 5, 2025 at 10:38 PM
#Muscadines, for those unfamiliar with the fruit, are barely domesticated grapes, with tough, rubbery skins and unpleasant, spiky little seeds. lisadavis.substack.com/p/grape-ball...
Me: Why is there Halloween stuff in the stores already? Why are there scary movies in the theaters in the summer? It’s too early for spooky season!
Old age: Want to see something really scary?
Me: No. But yes.
Old age: It’s me!
lisadavis.substack.com/p/old-age-vs... #oldage #elders
Old age: Want to see something really scary?
Me: No. But yes.
Old age: It’s me!
lisadavis.substack.com/p/old-age-vs... #oldage #elders
Old age vs. new tech
Another in my continuing conversation with Old Age
lisadavis.substack.com
August 29, 2025 at 12:26 PM
Me: Why is there Halloween stuff in the stores already? Why are there scary movies in the theaters in the summer? It’s too early for spooky season!
Old age: Want to see something really scary?
Me: No. But yes.
Old age: It’s me!
lisadavis.substack.com/p/old-age-vs... #oldage #elders
Old age: Want to see something really scary?
Me: No. But yes.
Old age: It’s me!
lisadavis.substack.com/p/old-age-vs... #oldage #elders
It’s pass muster, not mustard. “Muster” is an old word meaning an assembling of troops for inspection, so if you “pass muster” you pass inspection. “Pass mustard” would be something you do at a cook-out, or perhaps while playing Clue. lisadavis.substack.com/p/did-i-say-...
Did I say that right?
It’s hard to pass mustard in a doggy-dog world
lisadavis.substack.com
August 24, 2025 at 1:25 PM
It’s pass muster, not mustard. “Muster” is an old word meaning an assembling of troops for inspection, so if you “pass muster” you pass inspection. “Pass mustard” would be something you do at a cook-out, or perhaps while playing Clue. lisadavis.substack.com/p/did-i-say-...
Credit for the sticky note goes to Spencer Silver, a scientist at 3M who in 1968 was trying to make a super-strong adhesive but instead accidentally invented a “low-tack, reusable, pressure-sensitive adhesive.” lisadavis.substack.com/p/sticky-sit...
Sticky situation
What's small and yellow and keeps me sane?
lisadavis.substack.com
August 15, 2025 at 12:20 PM
Credit for the sticky note goes to Spencer Silver, a scientist at 3M who in 1968 was trying to make a super-strong adhesive but instead accidentally invented a “low-tack, reusable, pressure-sensitive adhesive.” lisadavis.substack.com/p/sticky-sit...
The internet ate my brain and now I can't remember how books work lisadavis.substack.com/p/reading-th...
Reading the room
The internet ate my brain and now I can't remember how books work
lisadavis.substack.com
August 8, 2025 at 3:47 PM
The internet ate my brain and now I can't remember how books work lisadavis.substack.com/p/reading-th...
Humans have always talked about cats in colorful ways. You can be a copy cat or a fat cat, a scaredy cat or a cat burglar. lisadavis.substack.com/p/cat-got-th...
Cat got the mother tongue
Why are there so many proverbs about kitties?
lisadavis.substack.com
August 1, 2025 at 10:28 PM
Humans have always talked about cats in colorful ways. You can be a copy cat or a fat cat, a scaredy cat or a cat burglar. lisadavis.substack.com/p/cat-got-th...
There are only four ingredients in a basic fortune cookie: flour, sugar, vanilla and oil. Well, I guess it’s five ingredients if you count the little slip of paper. lisadavis.substack.com/p/misfortune...
Misfortune cookies
Fortune cookies aren’t the smart cookies they once were
lisadavis.substack.com
July 25, 2025 at 2:31 PM
There are only four ingredients in a basic fortune cookie: flour, sugar, vanilla and oil. Well, I guess it’s five ingredients if you count the little slip of paper. lisadavis.substack.com/p/misfortune...
Free of charge
The battery of problems I went through to fix my phone
lisadavis.substack.com
July 20, 2025 at 1:04 PM
Kitten kaboodle
The cat distribution system works in mysterious ways
lisadavis.substack.com
July 11, 2025 at 12:17 PM
322.7 million: Pounds of fireworks bought by consumers in 2024, according to the American Pyrotechnics Association. lisadavis.substack.com/p/all-fired-up
All fired up
Bang! bang! bang! went the volley
lisadavis.substack.com
July 4, 2025 at 4:16 PM
322.7 million: Pounds of fireworks bought by consumers in 2024, according to the American Pyrotechnics Association. lisadavis.substack.com/p/all-fired-up
#ConversationsWithOldAge
Me: I remember when I used to run into my friends out to eat at restaurants, or going to shows.
Old age: And now?
Me: I run into my friends at physical therapy.
lisadavis.substack.com/p/old-age-co...
Me: I remember when I used to run into my friends out to eat at restaurants, or going to shows.
Old age: And now?
Me: I run into my friends at physical therapy.
lisadavis.substack.com/p/old-age-co...
Old Age comes a'calling
I am so sorry, but I can't remember your name
lisadavis.substack.com
June 27, 2025 at 10:04 PM
#ConversationsWithOldAge
Me: I remember when I used to run into my friends out to eat at restaurants, or going to shows.
Old age: And now?
Me: I run into my friends at physical therapy.
lisadavis.substack.com/p/old-age-co...
Me: I remember when I used to run into my friends out to eat at restaurants, or going to shows.
Old age: And now?
Me: I run into my friends at physical therapy.
lisadavis.substack.com/p/old-age-co...