Who wants to join my new band? It’s called Past Burrito Tragedies.

No spacesuits because vampires don’t need to breathe and the weapon that humans use against them is a flashlight that simulates the effect of the sun through Earth’s atmosphere.

Further idea: it isn’t sunlight that hurts vampires, but DIFFUSED sunlight through an Earth-like atmosphere. Solution? Vampire colony on Mars.

Virginian here. My grandparents have always had a drink fridge in their garage. I always just thought it was a farmer thing. Like, “I want to get a Gatorade but I don’t want to track mud in the kitchen.”

Anyone who’s ever waited tables knows that a lot of people don’t know a darn thing about the food they eat. Cue “eggless omelet” gif.