Eggs, bacon, bread, coffee, orange juice… that’s the damn sauce right there.

I trust escalators more than I trust stairs. Stairs just sit there, judging. Escalators do the work. Escalators have my back. Stairs want me dead.

i was invited to go to a children's museum, and i don't know if the adults who invited me know that it's a children's museum? the adults who invited me do not have children of their own

i'm making up excuses as to why I can't make it, but now they're rescheduling their museum for me... ffffffffffff

why do we even drink the last sip of coffee when we know it's going to be cold and unpleasant? something human about it though. finishing things even though we don't want to.