been thinking really hard of relocating to another country but we can't really afford bring all of my family members outside especially when majority of them are old and have communities, lives, jobs, and bonds already in this country. so yeah. end of brain vomit i guess lmao

it's just that a big chunk of my mental health involves assuring my family to have a good life in this country in the future, and that would necessitate good transportation, infrastructure, health care, job security, housing -- which all involves govt policies and action

i dont mind if they block or mute me as well, since they're also just curating their own online experience!! at the end of the day, we're all just protecting our own peace & mental health c:

so i don't actively talk to people about it anymore, nor do i also force them to join. but i will do what i feel like i need to do cuz it feels really suffocating staying in silence when i know i have the voice and actions that can inspire someone in the position to make a change.

which i also understand and respect!!! even i myself also don't have the emotional and mental capacity to understand corruption and govt movements that are too foreign from my personal daily life

also i grew up liking anime, manga, BL, and weeb things in my teenage years and most my fellow fans around that time are either neutral about politics or don't care at all. and it felt out of place to even talk about it, sharing how they prefer to keep it separate since fandoms are their comfy space

i just hope the livers themselves dont get in some sort of trouble for what i did. i just wanted to bring the papes to the peaceful rally to show that "its so bad even vtuber fans are here" too HAHAHA

if u know what i do for a living (for the past 3 years lmao) so attending rallies and fighting for rights isn't really something new for me but this online attention definitely is HAHAHHA

also a lot of sappy things happening irl and at home, even at work, and I’m oversaturated with drama I just wanna immerse in a series or a movie or any fiction to reset my mind off things 😭

urgent work shit is also getting a bit manageable now but I still honestly want to change locations because I’ve been traveling to a city 20km away from my house for 3 fucking years now

better in terms of aggressiveness against kamote riders HAHAHAHA

grab is just SO expensive and commuting drains my fucking soul out, but him picking me up (with my car lmao) soothes my anxieties with work and life 😭 also HOW CAN HE DRIVE BETTER THAN ME WHEN I’VE BEEN DRIVING 8 MONTHS EARLIER GRRRRRR (competitive me lmao)

he has a driver with him that’s why I agreed 🤣

Anywayyyyyyy hayyyy inis na inis tlga ako sa client na to like man how can you be 6 years older than me and still be THIS difficult to talk to 😭😭

the universe can't handle our dark humor i swear we're gonna get cancelled af in this society once our convos get leaked pfftttt

we also tried to lighten up the mood saying he has an excuse now to buy a new phone, or his bold photos might cause him his disbarment AND THESE WERE ALL DONE THRU EMAIL help we're still as chaotic as ever ww

-- THAT HIS PHONE GOT SNATCHED LMAOOOOOOOOO its so funny cuz in his province people are most likely scared (??) of him but here he's reduced to a snatch victim so we ended up planning out meeting thru EMAILS lmaooooo

Parang lahat sila sabog or walang kaen. Iilan lang talaga yung matino and hindi pa yan consistent.