@bklyncullie.bsky.social
“I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus” ok you don’t have to tell the kids WHY you’re divorcing their mom, Brad, Jesus.
December 5, 2025 at 2:12 PM
“I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus” ok you don’t have to tell the kids WHY you’re divorcing their mom, Brad, Jesus.
A haunted house but it’s just a loop of the time the server said, “thanks, come again” and I said “YOU TOO!”
October 31, 2025 at 5:31 PM
A haunted house but it’s just a loop of the time the server said, “thanks, come again” and I said “YOU TOO!”
Watching the Pitt and Noah hasn’t asked for one CBC or Chem-7 did he learn nothing at ER?
October 27, 2025 at 10:03 PM
Watching the Pitt and Noah hasn’t asked for one CBC or Chem-7 did he learn nothing at ER?
Me now: oh thank you Delta get this bagzilla away from me whew what a relief
Me in 5 mins: omg omg what if they lose my bag I shall track the AirTag every 3.5 mins for the next 7 hours
Me in 5 mins: omg omg what if they lose my bag I shall track the AirTag every 3.5 mins for the next 7 hours
October 24, 2025 at 7:24 AM
Me now: oh thank you Delta get this bagzilla away from me whew what a relief
Me in 5 mins: omg omg what if they lose my bag I shall track the AirTag every 3.5 mins for the next 7 hours
Me in 5 mins: omg omg what if they lose my bag I shall track the AirTag every 3.5 mins for the next 7 hours
Sometimes my depression is like “we’re not quite there yet why don’t you strip and look at your dumb face and dumb body in the mirror whilst reminiscing about that dumb thing you said in the elevator yesterday and THEN we can have the ice cream”
October 11, 2025 at 3:23 PM
Sometimes my depression is like “we’re not quite there yet why don’t you strip and look at your dumb face and dumb body in the mirror whilst reminiscing about that dumb thing you said in the elevator yesterday and THEN we can have the ice cream”
Alternate side parking is discriminatory against ADHD ppl
October 11, 2025 at 3:13 PM
Alternate side parking is discriminatory against ADHD ppl
BRAIN: all righty, if we leave RIGHT NOW we should be right on time maybe even early this day’s gonna be the…
BODY: you know what’d be cool right about now? A niiiice loooong poop session
BODY: you know what’d be cool right about now? A niiiice loooong poop session
October 1, 2025 at 2:47 PM
BRAIN: all righty, if we leave RIGHT NOW we should be right on time maybe even early this day’s gonna be the…
BODY: you know what’d be cool right about now? A niiiice loooong poop session
BODY: you know what’d be cool right about now? A niiiice loooong poop session
Thanks for the job offer, just finally caught up on all the Dr appts I needed so I’m available to start around Feb 15
September 29, 2025 at 6:47 PM
Thanks for the job offer, just finally caught up on all the Dr appts I needed so I’m available to start around Feb 15
INT apt 10:30pm
*buzz*
Who is it?
*buzz*
Who is it?
*buzz*
WHO. IS. THERE.
*delivery*
What kind?
*crickets*
~wide awake until 2am~
We are not the same, men.
*buzz*
Who is it?
*buzz*
Who is it?
*buzz*
WHO. IS. THERE.
*delivery*
What kind?
*crickets*
~wide awake until 2am~
We are not the same, men.
September 27, 2025 at 1:28 PM
INT apt 10:30pm
*buzz*
Who is it?
*buzz*
Who is it?
*buzz*
WHO. IS. THERE.
*delivery*
What kind?
*crickets*
~wide awake until 2am~
We are not the same, men.
*buzz*
Who is it?
*buzz*
Who is it?
*buzz*
WHO. IS. THERE.
*delivery*
What kind?
*crickets*
~wide awake until 2am~
We are not the same, men.
🌟 Celebrating three days of not correcting anyone’s grammar or spelling in a group text 💫
August 9, 2025 at 9:57 PM
🌟 Celebrating three days of not correcting anyone’s grammar or spelling in a group text 💫
Do ppl eat that li’l moist gross tip of the banana or nah
June 26, 2025 at 1:50 PM
Do ppl eat that li’l moist gross tip of the banana or nah
Current underpant classifications:
- Preferred
- Ex-preferred, still hanging
- Too big but all cotton, might as well work out in them
- Why are these in my drawer I can afford underpants
- Preferred
- Ex-preferred, still hanging
- Too big but all cotton, might as well work out in them
- Why are these in my drawer I can afford underpants
June 21, 2025 at 2:36 PM
Current underpant classifications:
- Preferred
- Ex-preferred, still hanging
- Too big but all cotton, might as well work out in them
- Why are these in my drawer I can afford underpants
- Preferred
- Ex-preferred, still hanging
- Too big but all cotton, might as well work out in them
- Why are these in my drawer I can afford underpants
Ate the top piece of the banana with the weird li’l black part, in case you thought I was f*cking around today.
June 11, 2025 at 1:55 PM
Ate the top piece of the banana with the weird li’l black part, in case you thought I was f*cking around today.
Google maps: that’s an 8-minute walk
New Yorkers: my fucking ass 8 minutes
New Yorkers: my fucking ass 8 minutes
May 21, 2025 at 1:15 PM
Google maps: that’s an 8-minute walk
New Yorkers: my fucking ass 8 minutes
New Yorkers: my fucking ass 8 minutes
It’s not guns it’s mental hea…
May 1, 2025 at 10:57 PM
It’s not guns it’s mental hea…
Reposted
This is really unfair to everyone who just voted for him for the racism.
April 7, 2025 at 12:18 AM
This is really unfair to everyone who just voted for him for the racism.
I know this isn’t a top priority rn but we have data that shows we live longer when we take naps and I haven’t noticed any nap-time wings being built out do you people believe in science or what
March 19, 2025 at 11:10 AM
I know this isn’t a top priority rn but we have data that shows we live longer when we take naps and I haven’t noticed any nap-time wings being built out do you people believe in science or what
I clean before the cleaning lady, but not so much that the cleaning lady would KNOW I cleaned before her. Lest she think I overthink it.
March 15, 2025 at 2:38 PM
I clean before the cleaning lady, but not so much that the cleaning lady would KNOW I cleaned before her. Lest she think I overthink it.