can someone remind me to not sleep or get too distracted because i swear that everytime i bat an eye the white rabbit becomes a coldblooded serial killer and i become his prime target

New year exactly same me because im a lazy slob and i refuse to do anything with my miserable piece of shit life

This image is teh very proof that it takes very little to make me happi :33 dis smol blue spot in the grey clouded sky makes me realize dat despite the world being dark n all dat sad stuff there is still beauty :D ✩✨*✧

BRO THERE'S A GROUP OF FRIENDS NEAR THE TABLE I'M SITTING AT AND THERE'S FOUR OF THEM AND THERE ARE 2 GIRLS AND 2 GUYS AND A GUY HAS GLASSES AND SO DOES ONE OF THE GIRLS AND THE OTHER GIRL IS LIKE GOTHISH AND BLONDE OMG THEYRE THE BETA KIDS

Someone please fucking kill me I just remembered about that one time I told a trans guy that his voice was very high pitched for a guy. I'M SO SORRY NOAH IF YOU'RE OUT THERE I SWEAR I THOUGHT YOU WERE CIS DUDE😔

BYEEE IM LOSING MY MARBLES I FOUND A NOTE THAT SAID " #susie #deltarune ###neverspeaktomeagain😎🖕" ON THE NOTES APP ON MY OLD IPAD FROM 2020 AND THAT'S THE LEAST UNFUNNY THING THERE

Throwback to when back in 2nd grade a dude in my class nonchalantly stabbed his arm with a bamboo skewer and it traumatized me so much that in my swim class whenever I had to dive I would do the "toothpick/skewer style dive" and pretend the water was my classmate's arm to cope with what I saw

Water cold enough to make you shit rocks

latatatata he's the papapapa he's the only one that I wanna give a big hug he's a lot of fun he gots a watergun now i gotta ruuuun dun dun dun dun du dun

ts song fye af

Omga

What if this apple was in a reality show and it argued with a marshmallow but then they became friends but a bow (a ghost one to be specific) possessed it to make it say bad things about the marshmallow so they wouldn't be friends anymore

Bajork

I almost choked on my drink because I thought of Mario saying "it's-a me, Mango!"

can someone make a wedding alignment video thing with the tpot intro and like two people (i don't know who) high five and then uhh i uh you decide the rest

the new york chicken nugget

the other day i was with my bestie and she was playing toca boca and at one point i saw i really cute cat so i pointed at it and confidently went "that's a cute dog!" and as soon as i realized what the fuck i just said i absolutely lost it

for context it was probably like 2 AM