Ben Darfler
@bdarfler.com
Engineering Leader, Father, Meditator, Elected Official, He/Him
Currently, Chief of Staff at Honeycomb.io
Currently, Chief of Staff at Honeycomb.io
"To increase the chances of getting a "yes," try this exercise. Once you’ve drafted your note, ask yourself: What part of this mentions things that mostly benefit me? What parts benefits the other person? Why would they eagerly say yes to this?"
newsletter.weskao.com/p/how-to-get...
newsletter.weskao.com/p/how-to-get...
How to get an enthusiastic yes
Most people suck at asking for things. Here's an easy framework for how to ask (and get a yes).
newsletter.weskao.com
November 13, 2025 at 2:03 PM
"To increase the chances of getting a "yes," try this exercise. Once you’ve drafted your note, ask yourself: What part of this mentions things that mostly benefit me? What parts benefits the other person? Why would they eagerly say yes to this?"
newsletter.weskao.com/p/how-to-get...
newsletter.weskao.com/p/how-to-get...
This one hit hard. "framing requests as a favor is … intellectually lazy. When you can’t fall back on framing as a favor, you’re forced to actually think about why your request is important for the business."
newsletter.weskao.com/p/work-reque...
newsletter.weskao.com/p/work-reque...
Work requests are not “favors”
Framing a work request as a favor uses social capital and makes you look incompetent. If your request is reasonable, ask respectfully and confidently.
newsletter.weskao.com
November 12, 2025 at 2:02 PM
This one hit hard. "framing requests as a favor is … intellectually lazy. When you can’t fall back on framing as a favor, you’re forced to actually think about why your request is important for the business."
newsletter.weskao.com/p/work-reque...
newsletter.weskao.com/p/work-reque...
I'm always looking to find structure without bureaucracy. "Favor principles over rules: Guidelines anchored in principles travel further than rigid instructions. Instead of prescribing every step, set clear expectations and empower teams to adapt."
askachiefofstaff.substack.com/p/issue-80-t...
askachiefofstaff.substack.com/p/issue-80-t...
Issue 80: The Goldilocks Principle of Operational Scaling
How Chiefs of Staff can find the ‘just right’ balance between structure and speed
askachiefofstaff.substack.com
November 11, 2025 at 2:03 PM
I'm always looking to find structure without bureaucracy. "Favor principles over rules: Guidelines anchored in principles travel further than rigid instructions. Instead of prescribing every step, set clear expectations and empower teams to adapt."
askachiefofstaff.substack.com/p/issue-80-t...
askachiefofstaff.substack.com/p/issue-80-t...
Reposted by Ben Darfler
Every time I open a new sponge: why didn't I do this sooner?
Middle age is primarily about opening a new kitchen sponge and going "this is much better"
October 31, 2025 at 3:05 AM
Every time I open a new sponge: why didn't I do this sooner?
A great take on going one level deeper with strategy - "Add beliefs to [Rumelt's strategy] framework. More precisely, separate the diagnosis into present truths and future beliefs." kellblog.com/2024/05/12/s...
Strategy as a Series of Beliefs
I’m always looking for better ways to distill strategy. My favorite strategy author is Richard Rumelt, who wrote Good Strategy, Bad Strategy and the more recent but less acclaimed follow-on, The…
kellblog.com
September 30, 2025 at 1:03 PM
A great take on going one level deeper with strategy - "Add beliefs to [Rumelt's strategy] framework. More precisely, separate the diagnosis into present truths and future beliefs." kellblog.com/2024/05/12/s...
Reposted by Ben Darfler
Don't love dunking on execs, but this process of building out KPI trees is super powerful.
Execs care about revenue. How do we get them to care about outcomes? jeffgothelf.com/blog/execs-c...
Execs care about revenue. How do we get them to care about outcomes? jeffgothelf.com/blog/execs-c...
Execs care about revenue. How do we get them to care about outcomes?
This post was originally published to my newsletter subscribers (12k of them now). If you’d like to get these in your inbox sign up here. If there’s one metric that matters to all executives, it’s…
jeffgothelf.com
September 25, 2025 at 1:04 PM
Don't love dunking on execs, but this process of building out KPI trees is super powerful.
Execs care about revenue. How do we get them to care about outcomes? jeffgothelf.com/blog/execs-c...
Execs care about revenue. How do we get them to care about outcomes? jeffgothelf.com/blog/execs-c...
Reposted by Ben Darfler
As I was saying…
Jimmy Kimmel is Back!
YouTube video by Jimmy Kimmel Live
youtu.be
September 24, 2025 at 4:27 AM
As I was saying…
There is so much focus put on good KRs that I've absolutely fallen into the trap of over indexing on the KRs and ignoring the Os. This is a great reminder to ask "what 'story' the numbers will tell when we achieve them?" jeffgothelf.com/blog/okrs-wi...
OKRs without objectives are only half the story
Lots would prefer to skip objectives and head straight or the key results. This is only half the story. Here's how to get the objective into the story.
jeffgothelf.com
September 24, 2025 at 1:04 PM
There is so much focus put on good KRs that I've absolutely fallen into the trap of over indexing on the KRs and ignoring the Os. This is a great reminder to ask "what 'story' the numbers will tell when we achieve them?" jeffgothelf.com/blog/okrs-wi...
I've been thinking a lot about how OKRs scale with a company. At some point, the style of OKRs starts to differentiate at different levels. There can no longer be a one size fits all approach. jeffgothelf.com/blog/how-to-...
How-to: At what level should I write my OKRs?
Here's how to set the proper level for your Objectives & Key Results so you can set goals your team can achieve.
jeffgothelf.com
September 23, 2025 at 1:02 PM
I've been thinking a lot about how OKRs scale with a company. At some point, the style of OKRs starts to differentiate at different levels. There can no longer be a one size fits all approach. jeffgothelf.com/blog/how-to-...
Joining my fellow Americans. #firstamendment
September 21, 2025 at 1:35 PM
Joining my fellow Americans. #firstamendment
Reposted by Ben Darfler
Goebbels Ends Careers of Five 'Aryan' Actors Who Made Witticisms About the Nazi Regime (Published 1939)
www.nytimes.com
September 18, 2025 at 3:15 PM
Another great take on KPI trees. I particularly liked the practical visualization ideas for showing relationships, both direct and indirect.
Get started on your KPI Tree www.axel.pm/p/get-starte...
Get started on your KPI Tree www.axel.pm/p/get-starte...
Get started on your KPI Tree
When it comes to focus, goals and alignment, it can be pretty tough to ensure that everyone is on the same page. But don't worry, that's where a KPI Tree 🌳 comes in!
www.axel.pm
September 16, 2025 at 1:02 PM
Another great take on KPI trees. I particularly liked the practical visualization ideas for showing relationships, both direct and indirect.
Get started on your KPI Tree www.axel.pm/p/get-starte...
Get started on your KPI Tree www.axel.pm/p/get-starte...
Reposted by Ben Darfler
#AIWeek continues with launch two—Anomaly Detection (now in alpha), Honeycomb’s new way to stay ahead of issues. Honeycomb learns your service patterns and gives early warnings before customers are impacted. Smarter, proactive observability starts now.
👉Read more: buff.ly/hakY4jJ
#honeycomb #AI
👉Read more: buff.ly/hakY4jJ
#honeycomb #AI
September 10, 2025 at 1:56 PM
#AIWeek continues with launch two—Anomaly Detection (now in alpha), Honeycomb’s new way to stay ahead of issues. Honeycomb learns your service patterns and gives early warnings before customers are impacted. Smarter, proactive observability starts now.
👉Read more: buff.ly/hakY4jJ
#honeycomb #AI
👉Read more: buff.ly/hakY4jJ
#honeycomb #AI
Being data-driven isn't simply looking at numbers and hoping for insights. You need approaches to help interpret the data and then respond when trends shift.
Three Things You Need On Every KPI Graph www.staceybarr.com/measure-up/t...
Three Things You Need On Every KPI Graph www.staceybarr.com/measure-up/t...
Three Things You Need On Every KPI Graph
Do you have these 3 essential things on your KPI graphs in your dashboard? If not, you're misinterpreting your performance measure signals.
www.staceybarr.com
September 10, 2025 at 1:04 PM
Being data-driven isn't simply looking at numbers and hoping for insights. You need approaches to help interpret the data and then respond when trends shift.
Three Things You Need On Every KPI Graph www.staceybarr.com/measure-up/t...
Three Things You Need On Every KPI Graph www.staceybarr.com/measure-up/t...
One of the vanishingly few clear, practical, and direct treatments of how to build OKRs at the team level. Team OKRs in Action martinfowler.com/articles/tea...
Team OKRs in Action
Rather than cascade OKRs, use collaborative alignment.
martinfowler.com
September 9, 2025 at 1:02 PM
One of the vanishingly few clear, practical, and direct treatments of how to build OKRs at the team level. Team OKRs in Action martinfowler.com/articles/tea...
Reposted by Ben Darfler
Enjoying the For You feed? Give it a like ♡ to help more people discover it: bsky.app/profile/did:...
The more people use it -> the more feedback we get -> the better we can make it for you.
The more people use it -> the more feedback we get -> the better we can make it for you.
July 19, 2025 at 1:52 AM
Enjoying the For You feed? Give it a like ♡ to help more people discover it: bsky.app/profile/did:...
The more people use it -> the more feedback we get -> the better we can make it for you.
The more people use it -> the more feedback we get -> the better we can make it for you.
Getting the most out of Deep Research
- Step 1: Clearly state your goal
- Step 2: Provide context
- Step 3: Specify what you want the output to look like
- Step 4: Ask for the research plan and provide feedback
www.operatorshandbook.com/p/how-to-wor...
- Step 1: Clearly state your goal
- Step 2: Provide context
- Step 3: Specify what you want the output to look like
- Step 4: Ask for the research plan and provide feedback
www.operatorshandbook.com/p/how-to-wor...
How to work with AI: Getting the most out of Deep Research
The ultimate guide on how to use the most powerful AI feature for operators
www.operatorshandbook.com
August 14, 2025 at 1:02 PM
Getting the most out of Deep Research
- Step 1: Clearly state your goal
- Step 2: Provide context
- Step 3: Specify what you want the output to look like
- Step 4: Ask for the research plan and provide feedback
www.operatorshandbook.com/p/how-to-wor...
- Step 1: Clearly state your goal
- Step 2: Provide context
- Step 3: Specify what you want the output to look like
- Step 4: Ask for the research plan and provide feedback
www.operatorshandbook.com/p/how-to-wor...
Using AI as a thought partner (see the post for the full prompt)
- Reason from first principles and explain the thought process
- Be specific in your critiques
- Ask for more information if you need it
- Push for clarity instead of going along with every ask
www.operatorshandbook.com/p/how-to-wor...
- Reason from first principles and explain the thought process
- Be specific in your critiques
- Ask for more information if you need it
- Push for clarity instead of going along with every ask
www.operatorshandbook.com/p/how-to-wor...
How to work with AI: Using AI as a thought partner
Work through problems and pressure-test your reasoning with an on-demand AI sparring partner
www.operatorshandbook.com
August 13, 2025 at 1:02 PM
Using AI as a thought partner (see the post for the full prompt)
- Reason from first principles and explain the thought process
- Be specific in your critiques
- Ask for more information if you need it
- Push for clarity instead of going along with every ask
www.operatorshandbook.com/p/how-to-wor...
- Reason from first principles and explain the thought process
- Be specific in your critiques
- Ask for more information if you need it
- Push for clarity instead of going along with every ask
www.operatorshandbook.com/p/how-to-wor...
levered beta is all you need
how to win by riding waves you didn't make.
ethanding.substack.com
August 9, 2025 at 10:32 AM
Driving AI at Work: "AI use that boosts individual performance does not naturally translate to improving organizational performance. To get organizational gains requires organizational innovation, rethinking incentives, processes, and even the nature of work."
www.oneusefulthing.org/p/making-ai-...
www.oneusefulthing.org/p/making-ai-...
Making AI Work: Leadership, Lab, and Crowd
A formula for AI in companies
www.oneusefulthing.org
July 31, 2025 at 1:03 PM
Driving AI at Work: "AI use that boosts individual performance does not naturally translate to improving organizational performance. To get organizational gains requires organizational innovation, rethinking incentives, processes, and even the nature of work."
www.oneusefulthing.org/p/making-ai-...
www.oneusefulthing.org/p/making-ai-...
I appreciate how this mirrors the problem discovery and problem selection elements of the PSHE framework which I leaned heavily on when I reworked the engineering ladder at Honeycomb.
Moving from an orchestration-heavy to leadership-heavy management role. lethain.com/orchestratio...
Moving from an orchestration-heavy to leadership-heavy management role. lethain.com/orchestratio...
Moving from an orchestration-heavy to leadership-heavy management role.
For managers who have spent a long time reporting to a specific leader or working in an organization with well‑understood goals, it’s easy to develop skill gaps without realizing it. Usually this…
lethain.com
July 30, 2025 at 1:01 PM
I appreciate how this mirrors the problem discovery and problem selection elements of the PSHE framework which I leaned heavily on when I reworked the engineering ladder at Honeycomb.
Moving from an orchestration-heavy to leadership-heavy management role. lethain.com/orchestratio...
Moving from an orchestration-heavy to leadership-heavy management role. lethain.com/orchestratio...
This hit reading @charity.wtf's post:
> We’ve spent the past few decades ripping … down and drifting away from these communal hubs. But we haven’t stopped wanting them, or needing them. I hope, … that we are entering into a new era of rebuilding, sadder but wiser.
charity.wtf/2025/07/09/t...
> We’ve spent the past few decades ripping … down and drifting away from these communal hubs. But we haven’t stopped wanting them, or needing them. I hope, … that we are entering into a new era of rebuilding, sadder but wiser.
charity.wtf/2025/07/09/t...
Thoughts on Motivation and My 40-Year Career
I’ve never published an essay quite like this. I’ve written about my life before, reams of stuff actually, because that’s how I process what I think, but never for public consumption. I’ve been pus…
charity.wtf
July 29, 2025 at 5:56 PM
This hit reading @charity.wtf's post:
> We’ve spent the past few decades ripping … down and drifting away from these communal hubs. But we haven’t stopped wanting them, or needing them. I hope, … that we are entering into a new era of rebuilding, sadder but wiser.
charity.wtf/2025/07/09/t...
> We’ve spent the past few decades ripping … down and drifting away from these communal hubs. But we haven’t stopped wanting them, or needing them. I hope, … that we are entering into a new era of rebuilding, sadder but wiser.
charity.wtf/2025/07/09/t...
I'm kinda obsessed now with bridge-based algorithms that elevate content that builds consensus rather than just engagement. Twitter's community notes is an implementation of this.
www.niemanlab.org/2023/10/soci...
www.niemanlab.org/2023/10/soci...
Social media algorithms can be redesigned to bridge divides — here’s how
"It falls to both the tech companies that built these systems and an engaged public to create technologies designed for social cohesion."
www.niemanlab.org
July 29, 2025 at 1:01 PM
I'm kinda obsessed now with bridge-based algorithms that elevate content that builds consensus rather than just engagement. Twitter's community notes is an implementation of this.
www.niemanlab.org/2023/10/soci...
www.niemanlab.org/2023/10/soci...