Pinned
Professor "Bip" Limón
@bcd2.bsky.social
· May 31
(bedtime story) Daddy did a sneak attack and put the guard to sleep. Then Daddy unloaded the cash register because that’s where all the treasure is
Havana syndrome but just for dogs
December 25, 2025 at 11:36 PM
Havana syndrome but just for dogs
[ALERT] Possessed Toddler transformed 1 Digital Media Tablet into 2 Digital Media Tablet Fragments
December 25, 2025 at 11:31 PM
[ALERT] Possessed Toddler transformed 1 Digital Media Tablet into 2 Digital Media Tablet Fragments
The Covid boosters got me high
December 25, 2025 at 11:17 PM
The Covid boosters got me high
“Look honey. I just blew up a gas station in this open world MMORPG”
“That’s great boo. Hey boo, why does your 401k only have three dollars in it?”
“That’s great boo. Hey boo, why does your 401k only have three dollars in it?”
December 25, 2025 at 11:02 PM
“Look honey. I just blew up a gas station in this open world MMORPG”
“That’s great boo. Hey boo, why does your 401k only have three dollars in it?”
“That’s great boo. Hey boo, why does your 401k only have three dollars in it?”
(Siri voice) Initiate Hamburger
December 25, 2025 at 10:59 PM
(Siri voice) Initiate Hamburger
spider wearing glasses. whats up sixteen eyes
December 25, 2025 at 10:56 PM
spider wearing glasses. whats up sixteen eyes
Bro did you just tell it to the mountain
December 25, 2025 at 10:55 PM
Bro did you just tell it to the mountain
co-creator of Spunk, a real-time fluid simulator
December 25, 2025 at 10:52 PM
co-creator of Spunk, a real-time fluid simulator
oh this? this is my science watch. it lets me teleport.
December 25, 2025 at 10:52 PM
oh this? this is my science watch. it lets me teleport.
⏳
for christmas i want a fat penguin
December 25, 2025 at 10:18 PM
⏳
hocked up a lime-green loogie that proceeded to splatter and melt a hole in the sidewalk
December 25, 2025 at 10:11 PM
hocked up a lime-green loogie that proceeded to splatter and melt a hole in the sidewalk
cant wait to get home and play rimworld and make tomato sauce and rewatch eyes wide shut #IveGotTooMuchShitOnMe #ChristmasMorrow
December 25, 2025 at 6:21 PM
cant wait to get home and play rimworld and make tomato sauce and rewatch eyes wide shut #IveGotTooMuchShitOnMe #ChristmasMorrow
(in the midst of battle, casting a spell)
magic wand: Please enter your 2 factor divination code.
wizard: (flipping through spellbook) gotta have it here somewhere
spellbook: Please enter your 2 factor divination code.
wizard: this cant be happening man
magic wand: Please enter your 2 factor divination code.
wizard: (flipping through spellbook) gotta have it here somewhere
spellbook: Please enter your 2 factor divination code.
wizard: this cant be happening man
December 21, 2025 at 2:44 PM
(in the midst of battle, casting a spell)
magic wand: Please enter your 2 factor divination code.
wizard: (flipping through spellbook) gotta have it here somewhere
spellbook: Please enter your 2 factor divination code.
wizard: this cant be happening man
magic wand: Please enter your 2 factor divination code.
wizard: (flipping through spellbook) gotta have it here somewhere
spellbook: Please enter your 2 factor divination code.
wizard: this cant be happening man
Two dacks has visited you. They've names are "Aiding" and "Abetting". For a magnificent financial return, give them your Full name and tel no.
December 18, 2025 at 10:08 PM
Two dacks has visited you. They've names are "Aiding" and "Abetting". For a magnificent financial return, give them your Full name and tel no.
i take my sweet ass time crossing the intersection so the cars and trucks know who’s in charge
December 17, 2025 at 5:39 PM
i take my sweet ass time crossing the intersection so the cars and trucks know who’s in charge
i need 2-3 hours of personal time every day or else i will Flip my shit
December 17, 2025 at 4:36 PM
i need 2-3 hours of personal time every day or else i will Flip my shit
they had two gay penguins on the ark. Numerous references from undated apocrypha
December 15, 2025 at 7:49 PM
they had two gay penguins on the ark. Numerous references from undated apocrypha
when I die, I hope I wake up in an italian deli where you never get full
December 15, 2025 at 6:08 PM
when I die, I hope I wake up in an italian deli where you never get full
my three wishes:
1. concrete smells like fish oil
2. trees grow 50x faster
3. fire burns 1000x longer
1. concrete smells like fish oil
2. trees grow 50x faster
3. fire burns 1000x longer
December 9, 2025 at 2:36 AM
my three wishes:
1. concrete smells like fish oil
2. trees grow 50x faster
3. fire burns 1000x longer
1. concrete smells like fish oil
2. trees grow 50x faster
3. fire burns 1000x longer
a lot of the absurdities in life stem from the fact that depth of experience doesn't scale with depth of influence. a president quietly molding the economic trajectory of a vassal state could feel the same way a frat boy does playing Settlers of Catan in a rumpus room shrouded in bong mist
December 8, 2025 at 4:57 PM
a lot of the absurdities in life stem from the fact that depth of experience doesn't scale with depth of influence. a president quietly molding the economic trajectory of a vassal state could feel the same way a frat boy does playing Settlers of Catan in a rumpus room shrouded in bong mist
bro you're being mad dogmatic
December 8, 2025 at 4:53 PM
bro you're being mad dogmatic
eating doritos in a sauna and the steam is turning orange
December 8, 2025 at 4:40 PM
eating doritos in a sauna and the steam is turning orange
Do not feed roombas. I gave this one a cheeto and it followed me to the car
December 7, 2025 at 7:49 PM
Do not feed roombas. I gave this one a cheeto and it followed me to the car
sprained my wrist while sleeping (??)
December 7, 2025 at 5:03 PM
sprained my wrist while sleeping (??)
faucet attached to a camel’s hump
December 5, 2025 at 5:16 PM
faucet attached to a camel’s hump