My wife has just spilled the beans, she’s bought a remote controlled vacuum cleaner.
You would have never known, it cleaned them up so well.

I’m not sure what’s going on in our high street.. I’ve just walked passed Sephora or five make up shops.

I was determined to keep my heating off until the end of the year but I’m starting to get cold feet.

My local crematorium serves the best cream cakes..

I suggested they call them crème de la crem.

That didn’t go down well.

I once made a joke about Dr Martins, you should’ve seen the DM’s.

Just picked my son up from nursery, the kids had absolutely destroyed the place. It was like a car creche.