Shit I heard at work
@axxman.bsky.social
Real quotes of things my coworkers have said. Working in a professional office setting can be mind numbing at times, thankfully random weird comments lighten the mood.
“The D is not working”
December 1, 2025 at 4:52 PM
“The D is not working”
“There are many ways to solve the solution.”
November 13, 2025 at 7:12 PM
“There are many ways to solve the solution.”
“Just trying to paint the puzzle pieces together”
November 6, 2025 at 9:25 PM
“Just trying to paint the puzzle pieces together”
“Thats magic to my ears”
September 3, 2025 at 3:31 PM
“Thats magic to my ears”
“There is a fly in here and it’s driving me nuts! Do we have a fly swapper?”
August 7, 2025 at 4:29 PM
“There is a fly in here and it’s driving me nuts! Do we have a fly swapper?”
“How did it go last yesterday?”
July 25, 2025 at 3:17 PM
“How did it go last yesterday?”
“Every Friday that you’re out is my dick time”
June 26, 2025 at 3:50 PM
“Every Friday that you’re out is my dick time”
“Do you guys know what a ‘Her Mika’ is?”
“The countertop?”
“The countertop?”
May 15, 2025 at 5:12 PM
“Do you guys know what a ‘Her Mika’ is?”
“The countertop?”
“The countertop?”
“Good morning it’s afternoon now.”
May 15, 2025 at 5:07 PM
“Good morning it’s afternoon now.”
“I don’t want you to get thrown under the bandwagon”
May 14, 2025 at 7:12 PM
“I don’t want you to get thrown under the bandwagon”
“One nacho bar is going to upset the balance of our bathroom”
April 14, 2025 at 5:00 PM
“One nacho bar is going to upset the balance of our bathroom”
“Hold on, I’ve got to get this bigger”
April 3, 2025 at 3:43 PM
“Hold on, I’ve got to get this bigger”
“Y’all are seeing my box now right?”
February 5, 2025 at 9:04 PM
“Y’all are seeing my box now right?”
“Be right back, I’m gonna go let fudge out”.
Man I hope that’s her dog’s name!
Man I hope that’s her dog’s name!
January 15, 2025 at 8:22 PM
“Be right back, I’m gonna go let fudge out”.
Man I hope that’s her dog’s name!
Man I hope that’s her dog’s name!
“Can you come to my office and tell me if it smells bad?”
January 8, 2025 at 8:05 PM
“Can you come to my office and tell me if it smells bad?”
“Oh my gosh! You should see my box”
December 21, 2024 at 2:24 AM
“Oh my gosh! You should see my box”
“If only they had given me six more inches”
June 25, 2024 at 1:22 AM
“If only they had given me six more inches”
“We are really complexed. Why didn’t this work?”
May 22, 2024 at 8:51 PM
“We are really complexed. Why didn’t this work?”
“So, ‘crap ton’ is that standard or metric?”
May 9, 2024 at 3:52 PM
“So, ‘crap ton’ is that standard or metric?”
April 19, 2024 at 5:24 PM
“If you come with money, they’ll do you first”
March 26, 2024 at 4:15 PM
“If you come with money, they’ll do you first”
“The straw on the camel’s back”
March 21, 2024 at 3:33 PM
“The straw on the camel’s back”
March 6, 2024 at 2:21 PM
“You need that nice hard caulk”
March 4, 2024 at 7:21 PM
“You need that nice hard caulk”
“There’s an ‘unbalance in the force’, or whatever the Star Trek saying is”
March 1, 2024 at 6:15 PM
“There’s an ‘unbalance in the force’, or whatever the Star Trek saying is”