Thank you, Josh Johnson. You are a very good bean.

I fear I am learning to hate myself again. But this time I know it, and can change it. I can remember all the things I love. All the mistakes I *haven’t* made, and I think “I’m growing so much. I have changed so much. And I’m tired of letting society. So fuck it - let’s just NOT hate myself!”

But it’s nearly impossible to leave my mistakes in the past. Not my regrets, those just are what they are, but my mistakes.

My alcohol abuse in particular hurt people. My lies hurt people. Hell, sometimes my fists hurt people. And I hate it.

I’ve made great strides in leaving the “what if?”s in my past. Everything has led to good things. I am happier than I could have imagined, started grad school, and finally determined who I want to be.

I have done a fuckton of work on myself especially in the past decade, and I’m really proud of it. But now instead of hating myself, I look back and hate past me. And that’s something only I can teach myself. It’s almost like I’m looking for a reason to do it.

He points to the truth - hate and fear are so pervasive in our society that we absorb it by default almost immediately.

I can’t get the question out of my head, though.

I know - we broke the bookmarks!

Can I stealborrow that?

Honestly I just gave up for a hit. Pain in the rear.

Oooo I like that!

It’s like it takes one person and lists every tweet from the past three days before it moves on to the next. I would really like more variety.

Following?