Astrology for cynics
@astrologyforcynics.bsky.social
☸️Thematic anti-horoscope - we expose the flaws of each sign in different situations
💯 Original content, as it appeared in an astrology monthly in the 90s
😂 A different view on astrology and zodiac signs
💯 Original content, as it appeared in an astrology monthly in the 90s
😂 A different view on astrology and zodiac signs
A princess waiting for a knight in shining armour her whole life.Since this kind of man went extinct a long time ago, she's eternally depressed. She's shy, romantic & prone to dreamlike illusions, so when not weeping, she falls in love with covert bandits & blockheads #pisces #horoscope #pisceswoman
December 27, 2024 at 8:01 AM
A princess waiting for a knight in shining armour her whole life.Since this kind of man went extinct a long time ago, she's eternally depressed. She's shy, romantic & prone to dreamlike illusions, so when not weeping, she falls in love with covert bandits & blockheads #pisces #horoscope #pisceswoman
Aquarius woman came to
this world a few centuries too early. She is whimsical, unpredictable and progressive
in every sense of the word. She advocates ideas nobody else understands and is on the lookout for men with style, the type of
which have not yet appeared on Earth #horoscope #aquarius #women
this world a few centuries too early. She is whimsical, unpredictable and progressive
in every sense of the word. She advocates ideas nobody else understands and is on the lookout for men with style, the type of
which have not yet appeared on Earth #horoscope #aquarius #women
December 17, 2024 at 7:57 PM
Aquarius woman came to
this world a few centuries too early. She is whimsical, unpredictable and progressive
in every sense of the word. She advocates ideas nobody else understands and is on the lookout for men with style, the type of
which have not yet appeared on Earth #horoscope #aquarius #women
this world a few centuries too early. She is whimsical, unpredictable and progressive
in every sense of the word. She advocates ideas nobody else understands and is on the lookout for men with style, the type of
which have not yet appeared on Earth #horoscope #aquarius #women
Capricorn woman is depressed& phobic. With men, she's strict & merciless: she likes to order them around and punish them even for most innocent misdemeanours. But once she falls in love, she transforms into a sentimental spy. She falls for the charm of mature men in high places #horoscope #capricorn
December 12, 2024 at 7:21 AM
Capricorn woman is depressed& phobic. With men, she's strict & merciless: she likes to order them around and punish them even for most innocent misdemeanours. But once she falls in love, she transforms into a sentimental spy. She falls for the charm of mature men in high places #horoscope #capricorn
A cheerful strongwoman type. She is energetic & direct. Likes to eat, drink & party all night long. She loves to sing, play instruments, ponder philosophical questions & seduce intellectuals. Every encounter with male slouches causes serious damage to her nervous system. #sagittarius #horoscope
December 9, 2024 at 9:27 PM
A cheerful strongwoman type. She is energetic & direct. Likes to eat, drink & party all night long. She loves to sing, play instruments, ponder philosophical questions & seduce intellectuals. Every encounter with male slouches causes serious damage to her nervous system. #sagittarius #horoscope
A femme fatale who eats men for breakfast. She likes dangerous adventures, dramatic love affairs and swift action of all kinds, so she usually falls for stuntmen, boxers & gangsters. She finds a particular satisfaction in giving a hard time to mama's boys, dandies and homebodies. #horoscope #scorpio
December 1, 2024 at 1:00 PM
A femme fatale who eats men for breakfast. She likes dangerous adventures, dramatic love affairs and swift action of all kinds, so she usually falls for stuntmen, boxers & gangsters. She finds a particular satisfaction in giving a hard time to mama's boys, dandies and homebodies. #horoscope #scorpio
The unfocused coquette, Libra woman is surrounded by tons of suitors but is unable to decide which one she likes best. Convinced she is irresistible, she spends most of her day putting on airs and smiling from ear to ear, so in her older years, she is condemned to face yoga. #horoscope #libra #astro
November 26, 2024 at 6:35 PM
The unfocused coquette, Libra woman is surrounded by tons of suitors but is unable to decide which one she likes best. Convinced she is irresistible, she spends most of her day putting on airs and smiling from ear to ear, so in her older years, she is condemned to face yoga. #horoscope #libra #astro
Virgo woman is reserved and suspicious, but remembers all her romantic dates for years and is able to retell each one in detail. She likes dogs, cats, canaries and rich men, whereas neither her nor her digestive system can stand bullies,uncultured punks and blockheads.
#horoscope #virgo #zodiacsign
#horoscope #virgo #zodiacsign
November 24, 2024 at 11:17 PM
Virgo woman is reserved and suspicious, but remembers all her romantic dates for years and is able to retell each one in detail. She likes dogs, cats, canaries and rich men, whereas neither her nor her digestive system can stand bullies,uncultured punks and blockheads.
#horoscope #virgo #zodiacsign
#horoscope #virgo #zodiacsign
Leo lady is the boss, both at home and at work. She's confident, spends money like there is no tomorrow and is prone to dressing like a Christmas tree. She likes to seduce and abuse men, and always keeps one on the back burner. She always has the last word. #horoscope #leo #zodiacsigns #astrology
November 24, 2024 at 3:17 AM
Leo lady is the boss, both at home and at work. She's confident, spends money like there is no tomorrow and is prone to dressing like a Christmas tree. She likes to seduce and abuse men, and always keeps one on the back burner. She always has the last word. #horoscope #leo #zodiacsigns #astrology
Cancer woman is a romantic heroine who lives in the real world by pure mistake. Known for frequent falling head over heels in love with imaginary characters from rom-coms and daydreaming about Prince Charming. Since the latter never shows up, she is permanently depressed. #cancer #horoscope #zodiac
November 22, 2024 at 9:21 PM
Cancer woman is a romantic heroine who lives in the real world by pure mistake. Known for frequent falling head over heels in love with imaginary characters from rom-coms and daydreaming about Prince Charming. Since the latter never shows up, she is permanently depressed. #cancer #horoscope #zodiac
Gemini woman is a seductive chatterbox. She is curious, unreliable and falls in love easily. She likes fashion and watching TV. Adores scandals. All her life she's been seeking sensational men, in vain, leaving her no other choice than to be unfaithful. #horoscope #astrology #gemini #women
November 20, 2024 at 8:43 PM
Gemini woman is a seductive chatterbox. She is curious, unreliable and falls in love easily. She likes fashion and watching TV. Adores scandals. All her life she's been seeking sensational men, in vain, leaving her no other choice than to be unfaithful. #horoscope #astrology #gemini #women
A Rubenesque beauty who was definitely born in the wrong century. She likes to cook,
eat, sing and flirt. Despite all this, she prefers spending the majority of her day idling on the sofa in a horizontal position. Prone to daydreaming and falling for cheesy compliments. #horoscope #Taurus #women
eat, sing and flirt. Despite all this, she prefers spending the majority of her day idling on the sofa in a horizontal position. Prone to daydreaming and falling for cheesy compliments. #horoscope #Taurus #women
November 19, 2024 at 7:04 PM
A Rubenesque beauty who was definitely born in the wrong century. She likes to cook,
eat, sing and flirt. Despite all this, she prefers spending the majority of her day idling on the sofa in a horizontal position. Prone to daydreaming and falling for cheesy compliments. #horoscope #Taurus #women
eat, sing and flirt. Despite all this, she prefers spending the majority of her day idling on the sofa in a horizontal position. Prone to daydreaming and falling for cheesy compliments. #horoscope #Taurus #women
All Zodiac ladies in a few words! In our horoscope dating back from the 90s, find out what each sign is like and who their ideal partner is. One sign a day! #horoscope #astrology #women #zodiac #90s #aries #taurus #gemini #cancer #leo #virgo #libra #scorpio #sagittarius #capricorn #aquarius #pisces
November 18, 2024 at 8:51 PM
All Zodiac ladies in a few words! In our horoscope dating back from the 90s, find out what each sign is like and who their ideal partner is. One sign a day! #horoscope #astrology #women #zodiac #90s #aries #taurus #gemini #cancer #leo #virgo #libra #scorpio #sagittarius #capricorn #aquarius #pisces
The Aries woman is passionate, impatient and ready to fight with all men who get on her nerves (i.e. wimps, slackers, schmucks etc). She talks a lot, works a lot and demands a lot. Regular mortals cannot meet her criteria in any possible way. Calamity Jane of the Zodiac.
#horoscope #Aries #woman
#horoscope #Aries #woman
November 18, 2024 at 8:07 PM
The Aries woman is passionate, impatient and ready to fight with all men who get on her nerves (i.e. wimps, slackers, schmucks etc). She talks a lot, works a lot and demands a lot. Regular mortals cannot meet her criteria in any possible way. Calamity Jane of the Zodiac.
#horoscope #Aries #woman
#horoscope #Aries #woman
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Pisces man.
April 9, 2024 at 3:36 PM
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Pisces man.
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Aquarius man.
April 3, 2024 at 5:37 PM
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Aquarius man.
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Capricorn man.
April 1, 2024 at 6:13 PM
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Capricorn man.
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Saggitarius man.
March 22, 2024 at 9:15 AM
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Saggitarius man.
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Scorpio man.
March 19, 2024 at 7:47 PM
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Scorpio man.
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Libra man.
March 18, 2024 at 8:02 AM
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Libra man.
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Virgo man.
March 17, 2024 at 1:50 PM
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Virgo man.
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Leo man.
March 16, 2024 at 8:52 PM
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Leo man.
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Cancer man.
March 16, 2024 at 10:48 AM
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Cancer man.
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Gemini man.
March 15, 2024 at 7:56 AM
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Gemini man.
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Taurus man.
March 14, 2024 at 7:52 PM
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Taurus man.
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Aries man.
March 13, 2024 at 4:08 PM
Handsome, smart, rich - this is the kind of man you dream about. Dream on, baby, the myth of a perfect guy is long forgotten. In our antihoroscope "All the Zodiac men", you will find out who to expect instead of Prince Charming. Trust us, it's all in their horoscope sign. Here’s the Aries man.