Legendary post.

Blocked. Banned. Reported. My mom is calling your mom.

I knew it was only a matter of time :3

What a way to go…

I want to help you and your S/O find that brighter path forward, or to help with your overcoming of an obstacle.

Again, sorry for this weird long thread, but I care ab yall and wanna see folks happy and content with their lives.

feel free to reach out. I’ve experienced a lot in my time and I’ve helped a good number of friends through these troublesome emotions that love can bring.

All I can say is, don’t give up and keep being yourself, and the right one will find you.

And if you’re finding yourself in a tough place,

Now to wrap this up, I know this doesn’t speak for every relationship that I’ve talked about here, but it’s gotten a concerning degree as I’ve mentioned. I commend those out there who manage to beat the odds and make it work for the best.

But for those who still may not have figured it out yet,

We can do better, for the sake of people’s aching hearts. (And I’ve seen how passionate you all are out there, there’s some massive hearts out there and y’all genuinely have such a capacity for love it breaks mine to see you all hurting and I implore you to keep strong).

It’s gotten so morbidly out of control I feel like it is what is at the root of the cause of why there is such a seeming burst of relationship problems in the fandom or individuals struggling to find one, or even the fact that many don’t even want to bother trying given how messy it all seems to be.

but the “open” tag is just slapped on there for whatever reason, and nothing you or your partner do with each other is exclusive and it’s no different than how you both treat literally everyone else, I hate to tell you this but that isn’t a relationship; that’s just friends with benefits.

questioning what even is the point of saying it’s a relationship?

At some point it is imperative of exclusivity between partners to even have something qualify as a relationship, whatever that is requires a lot of—you guessed it—COMMUNICATION!

If you and / or your partner are “together”

Way too many times I’ve seen someone agree to be open, only for it to end with the person essentially becoming a second thought to the one requesting the openness. In more bizarre cases both agree to it but then proceed to “fool around” with so many people on their own terms that everyone is left

it a relationship is honestly insulting.

Open relationships, like closed ones, still need proper discussion, ground rules, and boundaries established before entering proceeds. If one side cannot agree to the terms, or is not comfortable with the idea, guess what: y’all shouldn’t be open!

trying to see one another. Rooming together helps, sure, but even then it can be dicey.

This moves on to the second point:

Open Relationships.

I’m not gonna lie y’all, this fandom especially has seemed to have bastardized the meaning of what an open relationship is to the point that even calling

place to “spend quality time” together? Cons are chaotic enough as is, please don’t add to the stress and fatigue by trying to attempt an LDR maintenance chore into the mix as well. The expectations will be there, last thing you need is to let your partner down by being 20 places at once AND

like they don’t exist or treat them as just another online entity.

If you fail to hold that valued relation close in the easy mode of online interactions, you will struggle with that connection when it comes to being together in person.

Also, can we stop with acting like a furcon is a perfect

the gap widens between significant others, so too does the barrier of communication. If anything, LDRs REQUIRE even more communication and commitment than an in-person / close by one tenfold.

You don’t just get to log on, enjoy the company of your PARTNER for a few hours, then log off and forget

However, something I have seemed to notice a pattern of is the sheer lack of commitment, effort, and most importantly, communication between partners who are in a LDR.

Now if anything, having that barrier has been made easy with things like gaming and VR, but holy shit guys it seems the more that

Long distance, and the extremely lackadaisical usage of open “relationships.”

Let’s start with the first one -

Long distance is tough, don’t get me wrong. It adds barriers and obstacles that the already surmountable efforts of close-by relations require and add to it considerably.