An entire harem to wash my clothes...except they're mechanical thieves who take my earnings! Here is the dialogue that would transpire if I were to woo one of them: 'Come, fine one. I permit you to leave your simple duties and meet me at -' *BEEEP-BOOP-BEE-DA-LE-BEEP!* Arf! ><

Hi! I'm Anubis Jordan, but call me AJ for short. Here, I direct my esoteric wisdom to solving your ridiculous modern problems. You're welcome. Am I a hypocrite for using technology to advocate an Eden of simple levers, pulley-systems, and greenery? Perhaps, but I love you! Arf!