Following Noem's brilliantly intuitive lead and in order to protect New Englanders' lives, 5 states have banned grey Nissans with Florida or South Dakota plates. New Hampshire's governor, citing the 1st Amendment and deeply held devotion to a Florida deity, adamantly declined to close her borders.

THE FASCISTS ARE COMING
250 years ago today a group of American Colonialists spread the alarm "The British are coming". As Longfellow later scribed, "The fate of a nation was riding that night". Today we need the next Dawes and Revere to raise the alarm that the fascist red hats are already here.

THE MAR-A-LAGO
CONNECTION

After reading Gene Hackman's obituary and recalling his performance in The French Connection, this name for a movie came to mind.

REAL LIFE CRIME STRAIGHT
FROM THE FRONT PAGES

BREAKING NEWS: President for Life Trump issued an Executive Disorder naming the third Monday in February as Supreme Leader of North Mexico Day.

Hour by hour since January 20, I have struggled to find words to adequately describe Trump's character or lack of. I would welcome suggestions for a new word specifically created to describe the most offensively heinous man in recent history.

BREAKING NEWS: The White House announced it developed the "next big thing". Everybody is saying it's much better than Artificial intelligence. It's called No Intelligence and was trained using Trump's brain. It has been so successful running the Presidency for the past week that nobody could tell.

BREAKING NEWS: Republican lawmakers send their "thoughts and prayers" to constituents who today lost many Federally paid life saving benefits. In a hastily prepared statement they said "It's for your own good", while neglecting to say that the lawmakers' benefits will not be effected.

A lot of horror shows on TV right now.

The end of the world as we know it. I'm trying to feel fine.

Today do not dishonor a great man by honoring an evil man.

At high noon on day 20 of the new year Satan commanded "Release the Kraken". And it was bad, very bad.

But harken, for the Kraken is an ancient, corpulent, lascivious felon whose days be numbered.

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Be joyful in hope, for this too shall pass.

BREAKING NEWS: Anonymous sources indicate that next week ICE is planning to raid a large business employing illegal and dangerous immigrants. They will be specifically targeting a mentally unstable South African and a Slovenian former "model" employed by a felonious Don at his Mar-a-Lago hideout.

Has anyone seen JD Vance since SpaceX's last launch?

Now is the Winter of Our Discontent.

BREAKING: Speaker of the House Ron Johnson replaced by Speaker of the Louse Elon Musk.

Pharmacy Benefit Managers' stocks fell after Trump said he would knock out middlemen - surprising for a party against efforts at healthcare reform beneficial to patients and not corporate donors. Trump's words are more likely a not so subtle "shake down" invite to a pay to play dinner at Mar-a-Lago.

I'm watching 1981 Central Park concert with Simon & Garfunkel on PBS and they just sang "American Tune". It reminded me again of how immigrants have made America and how we must always follow Lady Liberty and not Trump and his minions.

My Discovery Feed has the most wonderful photographs of nature I have ever seen. It makes the ugliness of the world's MAGAs pale by comparison.

BREAKING NEWS: Bashar al-Assad has been spotted in a bathroom at Mar-a-Lago sleeping on some Top Secret documents.