I've never been that into traveling. But Lindsay is, and I am very into the idea of doing things that make her happy. So we did a whole bunch of touristy stuff that she wanted to do during our recent trip to Florida. If you ask me how the trip was, I'll tell you the truth: I had the time of my wife!

My friend made me promise not to tell anyone that their pet had to have surgery after eating their purse. But I was so excited that the surgery was successful that I just had to tell everyone. So I guess you could say that the bag's out of the cat!

New idea: company that sells automatic spice grinders, but specifically marketed toward lawyers and law enforcement
Company name: Salt & Battery

New business model: a company that sells purposely defective yoga mats, kind of like how companies sell pre-ripped jeans.
Company name: Namastakes.

Hot take: the phrase "You're projecting" is just the adult version of "I know you are but what am I?".