Really need to eat something. So sick of throwing up and stomach pain but my head hurts and my stomach acid feels like it's eating me.

I need to perk up for my family too, it's starting to feel very sad and gloomy around here with all my problems.

Someone bring me something light and nutritious.

I just want to not be miserable and go to sleep. That is literally all I want right now.

Everything has been so fucked up I'm scared to take any extra meds.

I have my earbuds next to me but I'm somewhat scared to even try any music for fear of my mood going off.

Feeling so sorry for myself.

Need to whine for a min.

Cold. Headache. Stomach virus. Out of psych meds, and hung up with insurance. Filthy house. No money. Cat won't cuddle me. Insomnia. Gained too much weight. Had to sell car. Having bad nightmares. Really really exhausted.

I have got to get my shit together.

So frustrated. Can't sleep, but scared for no good reason to go to the living room alone. Can't handle headphones, so probably tv wouldn't help anyway.

😭

Two trazodone pills and I am slightly less agitated. Still unhappy and squirmy but better.

Not sleepy though. I should definitely be sleepy.

Woe is me.

Another scary night starting. Restless legs, short of breath, jittery and panicky. Only 2 hours of sleep last night, I am so tired but I am just beside myself. Need my meds changed back.

I have had an incredibly frustrating night. Can't sleep, can't calm down, can't relax my twitchy muscles.

I am literally at my wits end.

Very very hard not to cry and feel sorry for myself.

Feeling so so crazy. Can't slow down, can't sit still, can't hardly breathe, feel like I'm about to explode or jitter right out of my body.

I really really don't want to go to the hospital.

Sick.

Pain, nausea, nerve zingers, exhaustion.

Such a rough couple of weeks, I really need a break.

Miserable.

MISERABLE.

I have not eaten enough in the last two days to warm myself up. Just forced down a little food and am under several blankets, but so shivery and cold. Ugh.

Have come down from hypomania. Much quieter thoughts, and was able to sleep last night. Very wiped out now, and I am left with a mess around the house.

Don't feel like I can just relax, feeling down and anxious.

I should sleep. But I can't this wired. My 0% net is done, I only had 2. I really just want some cold water.

My therapist also wants me to journal every day this week and I haven't done it today. Not sure I'm up to it.

Somewhat off the rails today. Bipolar hypomania. Finally calming down but not tired and not hungry, though I've only eaten 450 calories today and I had to force it.

Everyone is asleep. Wish I had someone to talk to.