Aisha
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aisham.bsky.social
Aisha
@aisham.bsky.social
170 followers 180 following 130 posts
ADHD cat lady with food allergies and a gluten intolerance who loves to info dump. Nothing is real, everything has consequences, I once bit a dentist.
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aisham.bsky.social
They’re so… the way they are that there’s a separate preppers Reddit for women (r/twoXPreppers)
September 25, 2025 at 6:07 PM
aisham.bsky.social
HELLO THE RACCOON LEFT A PIECE OF BREAD ON MY WINDOWSILL
April 28, 2025 at 2:39 AM
aisham.bsky.social
Suzanne Collins surely didn’t sign off on this insane SHEIN x Hunger Games collage right? Right????
April 27, 2025 at 1:49 AM
aisham.bsky.social
Texting about the over/under of the raccoon that is definitely in my attic crawl space somehow falling through the ceiling into my house in the group chat, and putting the clarifications that (1) I’m not April fooling and (2) it’s definitely fatter than Teddy, my fattest beefiest cat.
A large tabby cat, Teddy, sleeps on a Sherpa blanket and a blue, gold, maize, and white throw. A large tabby cat lays on a large paper bag (because he could not figure out how to crawl in without sticking his head in the paper twine handles and he recognized that would end poorly, so he problem solved the bag urge by laying on it)
April 1, 2025 at 5:11 AM
aisham.bsky.social
Easy mode is turning on auto check and then typing every vowel in every box until all of the boxes with vowels are filled and then trying to guess the words based on the missing consonants.
Email from New York Times Games with subject Solve a Friday crossword on Easy Mode
March 21, 2025 at 2:09 PM
aisham.bsky.social
I got this one from behind the bastards (thanks @iwriteok.bsky.social) and am already incorporating it into my regular usage. “A brain as smooth as a pearl.”
From the transcript for behind the bastards episode part two: the zizians: birth of a cult leader. The important part for me is a brain as smooth as a pearl. Screenshot text: …title of a book that Yadkowsky had wrote about the time. And the book is about where and how civilizations get stuck. One reviewer, Brian Kaplan, who despite being a professor of economics, must have a brain as smooth as a pearl, wrote this about it. Every society is screwed up. Alisa Yadkowsky is one of the few thinkers on earth who are trying at the most general level to understand why. And this is like, wow, that's it. You please study the humanities a little bit, a little bit, a little bit. I mean, the first and most like one of the…
March 15, 2025 at 4:11 PM
aisham.bsky.social
This one is about Elon Musk and came from a Tesla subreddit. “Guy is a fucking pizza cutter. All edge, no point.”
A screenshot showing comments from a subreddit that reads Smartimess: "I've made the stock more affordable for new investors! Now fuck you! Seriously, fuck you!" Awkward silence while smiling like he had a stroke. A Reply DanKwan: No, see, the awkward silence comes after the first time he says it as he waits for applause for being so edgy. Then, due to the silence, he says it a second time to make sure his mic is on and everyone can hear him. Guy is a fucking pizza cutter. All edge, no point.
March 15, 2025 at 4:05 PM
aisham.bsky.social
This came from a circle jerk subreddit I follow. I read it while at a hockey game and it was so spectacular I had to make my best friend read it. “But I can't put you in chains, and I can't blow you away with a shotgun, so this metaphor really got away from me, I should get back to work.”
A screenshot of a comment on a subreddit that reads ArcHammer16 Harrison Bergeron is a 1961 short story by Kurt Vonnegut about a nightmare future where everyone is handicapped by the government so that "all people are finally equal." The title character storms a television show on air, rips off his chains, delivers an Ayn Rand protagonist-like monologue, then gets executed by the woman leading the government department (I think her title was Handicapper General) I bring all of this up as a reminder to myself, because your comment almost made me ask you if you could tone it down, because it's unfair to MaxFun generally, and the McElboys specifically, that you'd be so much funnier in your joke pitch than my Brothers (and my older brother, their dad) in this entire season of their comedy show. But I can't put you in chains, and I can't blow you away with a shotgun, so this metaphor really got away from me, I should get back to work
March 15, 2025 at 3:54 PM
aisham.bsky.social
What the fuck is this “Great Tasting GLP-1 Ally*” header in this email.
A screenshot of an email from Kroger about a free meal coupon for Vital Pursuit premade meals. Headline says “Great Tasting GLP-1 Ally*” and body says “Fuel your pursuit for less with a free Vital Pursuit™ meal. These delicious, high-protein recipes are designed with thoughtful portions and essential nutrients - for less prep on the foods to move you forward.”
March 10, 2025 at 7:10 PM
aisham.bsky.social
Seeing the shrek thing shared without the satire context… and being reacted to like they have thousands of followers too.
March 1, 2025 at 8:10 PM
aisham.bsky.social
Since every celebrity imaginable is now doing superbowl ads, I asked “What is the most ridiculous thing that Leonardo DiCaprio could do a Super Bowl ad for” in the chat. Callie immediately goes eharmony. No answer could top that. I’m mad I didn’t think of it.
February 10, 2025 at 4:12 PM
aisham.bsky.social
This is such a pleasing easy way to make pasta feel fancy. I love picking up burrata to add in or eat alone, but this is also delicious.
January 28, 2025 at 2:25 AM
aisham.bsky.social
This is my cat’s box. He chews it when he wants food or attention and I’m taking too long to get moving or I’m still working. I find it immensely funny.
January 22, 2025 at 1:00 AM