This isn’t a cry for help, but when I do go, I hope I haunt the plot with the same intensity as Lucy Gray Baird.

I think if someone let me, I could be Greta Gerwig. Not better than real Greta Gerwig, just in a Greta Gerwig font. I think that would be fun. Someone should let me be Greta Gerwig for a day, but real Greta Gerwig still has to be Greta Gerwig. There’s simply not enough Greta Gerwig in the world.

Suzanne Collins really looked at the one cannibal character and went, “Yeah, let’s name him Titus.” Subtlety? Never met her.

Patsy Ferran is the best thing to happen to live theatre since stage lights

A Sara Bareilles / Sarah Ruhl collab was not on my 2025 Bingo card, but I am THRILLED

All celebrities can read what you say about them—because, shockingly, they are both human and literate. Well… except Lea Michele. Jury is still out on whether or not she can read. Stay safe out there.

You think you can embarrass me? I used to role play as fictional characters on Twitter

The Philadelphia mayor had to know that telling people not to climb the light poles was only going to make them WANT to climb the light poles…

Seattle snow has commitment issues

I didn’t realize until this morning that, thanks to COVID forcing teachers to gain proficiency in remote learning, snow days don’t mean that kids get to spend all day sledding. That’s actually so sad.

There’s nothing quite like the mix of panic and flattery I feel when someone asks me for directions.

Rewatching every Hunger Games movie every year is part of my culture.

I think studio albums should have Overtures. I think we’re not realizing the full potential of Overtures.

I really truly believe that if I had 3-5 clones of myself, I’d be unstoppable.

I’m one solid breakdown away from quitting everything and running off to track Bigfoot.

Relieving the pressure of having an interesting first post by making this my first post.