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helping. Not that it ever truly was in the first place.

⠀⠀Eyes afix their attention on his Captain; glassy, hollow, empty.

⠀⠀"What do I do, Captain?" He asked sincerely, a tremble in his voice. He was hanging by a fraying thread, a thread which threatened to snap at any second.
⠀

⠀
by its neck. He poured himself another helping and downed that cup same as the last; quickly.

⠀⠀"... I can't sleep. Barely eat. I put on a brave front for our fellow squad members but..." His voice trailed off.

⠀⠀He was losing his sanity with every passing day. The alcohol was no longer —
⠀

⠀
see is blood, limbs and bodies. I can still hear the pleas and screams of the dying..."

⠀⠀Renji shivered just recalling it.

⠀⠀Pours his Captain a drink and hands it over, his gaze focused on the table between them, eyes distant.
⠀

⠀
feet. A glass, right.

⠀⠀"Where to start, where to start. Well, ever since the war with the Quincies ended, I haven't been able to sleep. When I close my eyes all I see is— ah found one!" Snags the cup he had been searching for and flops back down on the sofa, "All I —
⠀

⠀
don't have any excuse. I— just didnt want to be at home. It's... complicated. I don't want to bore you with the details, haha."

⠀⠀He laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head. Oh man he was so fired...
⠀

⠀
Captain! What uh— brings you here at this hour?" He laughs nervously, a bead of sweat rolling down his forehead.
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⠀
glassy eyes. Shit. Busted. He's gonna die isn't he? He's a dead man! Dead. D.E.A.D! Dead man be he! Or worse... an unemployed man. Renji would much rather be 𝖉𝖊𝖆𝖉 than have to return to his former life in the slums of Rukongai.

⠀⠀"Oh shi— 𝙖𝙝𝙚𝙢, I mean, Hi —
⠀

⠀
chalked it up as a booze fueled auditory hallucination. That lasted only a few seconds. His intoxicated mind finally caught up to the fact that the voice he had heard was, in fact, real.

⠀⠀His head snaps around, a nervous smile on his visage, a twinge of fear in his —
⠀

⠀
night was no different. Alone he sat in the office, not wanting to spend this night at home. At least here he didn't feel as isolated. It was a bit warmer than his residence, less... lonely.

⠀⠀Amidst his drunken stupor, he heard his captain's voice. At first he —
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⠀
Elusive and fleeting whence found.

⠀⠀Slowly he wastes away both mentally and spiritually. Day by day, night by night, ever searching for a remedy to what ails him at the bottom of each glass; each bottle. Alas, a cure yet to be found. So the cycle repeats.

⠀⠀This —
⠀