are you stupid

man what 🫩

It feels like a joke

saaame i have such a long list of stuff i really wanna watch and i never get around to any of it. but i have no problem starting like. a random cooking show or a shitty youtube essay because it matters way less to me lol

end up rereading the same few lines like 50 times before moving on. it’s never even an important line but it feels like im building a puzzle and i just took one of the pieces and chucked it out the window, and the full picture can’t be completed until i go outside and dig it out of the snow

it’s also this weird ocd guilt i get if im not giving a piece of media the attention it deserves, i almost get like this intense fomo if i miss even a scrap of info. a good example of this is when im reading and i get stuck on a sentence that my brain just refuses to process for some reason so i —

i think this a mix of having adhd and knowing how hard it is to focus 100% of my attention on something so i put it off until i Know i can do that because otherwise it’ll feel like im “wasting” it if i can’t absorb every ounce of information.

this got stuck playing on my screen and i was so fucking scared

i gotta say? im feeling a little under the weather in my brain. like some kind of mental….illness or something…… being exploited by corporations that depend on my bad habits……… and specifically take advantage of people like me……. ahem, and its all YOUR FAULT!

every day i wake up. grab my phone. your wifi is watching you and you’re on lists! yes YOU! YOU watching this instagram reel, they’re coming for you soon! and that situation that was bad? its crazy bad now. we’re going to kill ourselves over oil. do you feel like you’re in a sitcom yet? is it funny?

krampus

especially fun if you’re american