Jimmy Carter built my home and every time I use the toilet it shoots a liter of water into my gooch & colon

Jimmy cat-er and he has cute paws

Genius: They should do a Spotify wrapped for… *rolls dice* Spotify? Shit *rolls dice* Apple Music!

When you fart too loud and you know papa heard it 😹

I’m getting this turkey pregnant 🚫🧢

I’m thankspimpin this year

I’m a cool son of a bitch on and off the court that’s what they don’t get about me