V doesn't really feel he deserves any of the good things that have happened to him; doesn't feel worthy of any of it because he messed up really bad, & because he's still in the mindset where if he isn't directly told he does, especially by Draxum, he won't believe it.
Thankfully, Draxum isn't here.

Update yes I'm continuing the thread. Here is more Subject V :)

I saw everything.