tiny tim
@zayitika.bsky.social
zayit / זית. unhinged, unwell, and unafraid
Pinned
IUD = I'm UnDomfortable
November 6, 2025 at 7:31 PM
IUD = I'm UnDomfortable
my dreams ask the important questions. like what if FDR was one of the Beatles
October 13, 2025 at 2:29 PM
my dreams ask the important questions. like what if FDR was one of the Beatles
happy erev government shutdown, y'all
September 30, 2025 at 9:49 PM
happy erev government shutdown, y'all
if u cant commit to the bit, how will I know u can commit to me?
August 23, 2025 at 4:18 PM
if u cant commit to the bit, how will I know u can commit to me?
laundry is just a potion of clean clothes
July 31, 2025 at 3:35 PM
laundry is just a potion of clean clothes
soft launching my new boo today (I told my therapist abt him)
July 28, 2025 at 12:33 PM
soft launching my new boo today (I told my therapist abt him)
parents, just because your daughter is smiling at her phone doesn't mean she has a boyfriend. maybe she's looking at pictures of bionicles
July 24, 2025 at 11:20 AM
parents, just because your daughter is smiling at her phone doesn't mean she has a boyfriend. maybe she's looking at pictures of bionicles
I dress modest not to get closer to g-d but to hide all the hickeys
July 22, 2025 at 12:35 PM
I dress modest not to get closer to g-d but to hide all the hickeys
walk of shame but it's me collecting all the discarded seltzer cans in my apartment and putting them in the recycling bin
July 17, 2025 at 10:47 AM
walk of shame but it's me collecting all the discarded seltzer cans in my apartment and putting them in the recycling bin
if u ever want to feel bad about urself, go to a ringo starr concert. man's 84 years old, still touring, and occasionally jumping around on stage. meanwhile I, at the tender age of 29, took 3 hours to get out of bed today.
June 20, 2025 at 7:53 PM
if u ever want to feel bad about urself, go to a ringo starr concert. man's 84 years old, still touring, and occasionally jumping around on stage. meanwhile I, at the tender age of 29, took 3 hours to get out of bed today.
job hunting is like dating. there's an opening im tryna fill
June 9, 2025 at 10:54 PM
job hunting is like dating. there's an opening im tryna fill
devastating. just learned that packing extra snacks does nothing to nourish ur body if u forget to eat them
May 14, 2025 at 9:20 PM
devastating. just learned that packing extra snacks does nothing to nourish ur body if u forget to eat them
please, call me bobby pins. robert pins was my father
May 12, 2025 at 10:43 AM
please, call me bobby pins. robert pins was my father
white smoke to announce that i've elected to give up
May 8, 2025 at 5:15 PM
white smoke to announce that i've elected to give up
so when a bunch of old catholic men get together and gossip in secret it's a "conclave" and an "ancient tradition" but when me and my besties do that, it's "caddy" and "rude"
April 25, 2025 at 9:42 PM
so when a bunch of old catholic men get together and gossip in secret it's a "conclave" and an "ancient tradition" but when me and my besties do that, it's "caddy" and "rude"
shoutout to the guy at the airport wearing a shirt that says "I ❤️ MILFS"
April 21, 2025 at 6:58 PM
shoutout to the guy at the airport wearing a shirt that says "I ❤️ MILFS"
forget self driving cars, we should develop self cleaning glasses
April 18, 2025 at 1:49 PM
forget self driving cars, we should develop self cleaning glasses
wild how I show up to the dentist and know nothing except that I pay an insane amount of money for a stranger to stick their fingers down my gullet
April 14, 2025 at 1:32 PM
wild how I show up to the dentist and know nothing except that I pay an insane amount of money for a stranger to stick their fingers down my gullet
attorneys who do not send a redlined version of an updated draft should be disbarred
April 7, 2025 at 3:29 PM
attorneys who do not send a redlined version of an updated draft should be disbarred
I'm so glad I'm in the office full time so I can hear every teams. all of the person on the other side of my office who's in a different department
March 31, 2025 at 11:26 AM
I'm so glad I'm in the office full time so I can hear every teams. all of the person on the other side of my office who's in a different department
yeah I'm a pick me. pick me up, I'd like to be carried
March 30, 2025 at 1:50 PM
yeah I'm a pick me. pick me up, I'd like to be carried
the most unrealistic thing about #Severance is that Helly R. works in an office building with only men and she doesn't need a sweater
March 25, 2025 at 12:00 PM
the most unrealistic thing about #Severance is that Helly R. works in an office building with only men and she doesn't need a sweater
crazy that today is 4 years since i officially became jewish ✡️
March 24, 2025 at 12:50 PM
crazy that today is 4 years since i officially became jewish ✡️
I'm a normal jew who does normal jewish things. like reading apocryphal xtian texts in order to get closer to chaucer
March 22, 2025 at 6:40 PM
I'm a normal jew who does normal jewish things. like reading apocryphal xtian texts in order to get closer to chaucer
ur outie is on social media even though they haven't finished watching severance
March 22, 2025 at 3:38 PM
ur outie is on social media even though they haven't finished watching severance