wolfeyp
@wolfeyp.bsky.social
Chotiner saying "I'm just trying to understand..." is like Columbo saying "Just one more thing..." except Columbo says that AFTER the murder has been committed.
October 27, 2025 at 11:09 PM
Chotiner saying "I'm just trying to understand..." is like Columbo saying "Just one more thing..." except Columbo says that AFTER the murder has been committed.
Gotta end this conclave so I can get back in time for Eurovision finals.
May 8, 2025 at 4:51 PM
Gotta end this conclave so I can get back in time for Eurovision finals.
Fighter jets keep throwing themselves into the salty embrace of the sea because much like Kate Chopin, they yearn for woke.
May 8, 2025 at 4:49 PM
Fighter jets keep throwing themselves into the salty embrace of the sea because much like Kate Chopin, they yearn for woke.
Omelette? Oh fiend herbs!
April 12, 2025 at 7:46 PM
Omelette? Oh fiend herbs!
Cannot express how much I hate the clown on The Pitt (by "the clown" I mean the measles mom, not the guy in the clown makeup).
April 12, 2025 at 2:14 AM
Cannot express how much I hate the clown on The Pitt (by "the clown" I mean the measles mom, not the guy in the clown makeup).
The set already exists, so it's actually dereliction of duty that they don't make a The Pitt: Night Shift. Second season features a huge blizzard and several of the interns have to sleep in the hospital. I'm available for hire as a writer at very reasonable rates.
April 7, 2025 at 9:37 PM
The set already exists, so it's actually dereliction of duty that they don't make a The Pitt: Night Shift. Second season features a huge blizzard and several of the interns have to sleep in the hospital. I'm available for hire as a writer at very reasonable rates.
I was at the first PittFest in 2003. The lineup was The Clarks, Rusted Root, the Shriners driving around in those tiny cars, and a DJ that played a 45 minute remix of Sandstorm and Enter Sandman. It was incredible.
April 4, 2025 at 2:29 PM
I was at the first PittFest in 2003. The lineup was The Clarks, Rusted Root, the Shriners driving around in those tiny cars, and a DJ that played a 45 minute remix of Sandstorm and Enter Sandman. It was incredible.
OMG just seeing this now. Lol, sorry. (Me responding to the war plans group chat.)
March 26, 2025 at 2:37 AM
OMG just seeing this now. Lol, sorry. (Me responding to the war plans group chat.)
I'm running an Art History Stank Face March Madness tournament (64 paintings squaring off against each other to finally determine who has the stankiest face) and this is currently the number one seed that just had a blow out first round match: James Ensor's "Man of Sorrows"
March 18, 2025 at 2:28 AM
I'm running an Art History Stank Face March Madness tournament (64 paintings squaring off against each other to finally determine who has the stankiest face) and this is currently the number one seed that just had a blow out first round match: James Ensor's "Man of Sorrows"
By adding AI to the top of search results, Google managed to finally invent an even worse AskJeeves that boils a lake while not answering your question correctly.
March 17, 2025 at 1:54 PM
By adding AI to the top of search results, Google managed to finally invent an even worse AskJeeves that boils a lake while not answering your question correctly.
I'm giving up for Lent.
March 5, 2025 at 1:34 PM
I'm giving up for Lent.
I don't care how good the best soy latte that you ever had was, I don't need to hear about it in song.
February 27, 2025 at 5:08 PM
I don't care how good the best soy latte that you ever had was, I don't need to hear about it in song.
Jimmy Ma, the best American since Ben Franklin, should go to Worlds.
February 22, 2025 at 2:58 PM
Jimmy Ma, the best American since Ben Franklin, should go to Worlds.
The Pitt should be 22 episode seasons like ER.
Also it should air two seasons a year.
There should never not be a new episode of The Pitt. Noah Wiley should not be allowed outside of a hospital set until he is dead.
Also it should air two seasons a year.
There should never not be a new episode of The Pitt. Noah Wiley should not be allowed outside of a hospital set until he is dead.
February 21, 2025 at 5:52 AM
The Pitt should be 22 episode seasons like ER.
Also it should air two seasons a year.
There should never not be a new episode of The Pitt. Noah Wiley should not be allowed outside of a hospital set until he is dead.
Also it should air two seasons a year.
There should never not be a new episode of The Pitt. Noah Wiley should not be allowed outside of a hospital set until he is dead.
Jimmy Ma could medal at 4Continents?!?! Stop the count!
February 20, 2025 at 1:24 PM
Jimmy Ma could medal at 4Continents?!?! Stop the count!
Seeking funding for my next musical project CONCLAVE: The Jellicle Ball.
February 19, 2025 at 10:13 PM
Seeking funding for my next musical project CONCLAVE: The Jellicle Ball.
The Ends of Art History at the Musée d'Orsay open.substack.com/pub/realarth...
Wrote a little bit about being forced to sit around and listen to some guy.
#art #artsky #arthistory #painting #butt
Wrote a little bit about being forced to sit around and listen to some guy.
#art #artsky #arthistory #painting #butt
The Ends of Art History at the Musée d'Orsay
The Rosicrucians (and Guildenstern) are Dead
open.substack.com
February 18, 2025 at 11:06 PM
The Ends of Art History at the Musée d'Orsay open.substack.com/pub/realarth...
Wrote a little bit about being forced to sit around and listen to some guy.
#art #artsky #arthistory #painting #butt
Wrote a little bit about being forced to sit around and listen to some guy.
#art #artsky #arthistory #painting #butt
I'm glad we have now abolished the woke sport of American football and have banned the singing of the Star Spangled Banner, the National An(they/them), due to it containing several pronouns.
February 16, 2025 at 10:14 PM
I'm glad we have now abolished the woke sport of American football and have banned the singing of the Star Spangled Banner, the National An(they/them), due to it containing several pronouns.
(Nuclear bombs exploding, people screaming, chaos everywhere)
Chuck Schumer from his bunker: "I'm hearing a lot about inflation."
Chuck Schumer from his bunker: "I'm hearing a lot about inflation."
February 14, 2025 at 11:26 PM
(Nuclear bombs exploding, people screaming, chaos everywhere)
Chuck Schumer from his bunker: "I'm hearing a lot about inflation."
Chuck Schumer from his bunker: "I'm hearing a lot about inflation."
The gift shop at the National Gallery of Art is one of the worst gift shops I've ever had the displeasure of visiting. This is my formal application to be their new head of merchandising. Graphic design is my passion, etc.
February 14, 2025 at 7:49 PM
The gift shop at the National Gallery of Art is one of the worst gift shops I've ever had the displeasure of visiting. This is my formal application to be their new head of merchandising. Graphic design is my passion, etc.
People who were obsessed with calling Martin Luther a heretic? Diet of Worms for brains.
February 13, 2025 at 4:43 PM
People who were obsessed with calling Martin Luther a heretic? Diet of Worms for brains.
Things childhood prepared me for: frequent encounters with quicksand; knowing how to cross a river when I have a wolf, a hen; and a bag of seed; writing in cursive.
Things childhood did not prepare me for: the concept of budgeting; finding a place to live; responding to a coup.
Alas.
Things childhood did not prepare me for: the concept of budgeting; finding a place to live; responding to a coup.
Alas.
February 12, 2025 at 3:35 PM
Things childhood prepared me for: frequent encounters with quicksand; knowing how to cross a river when I have a wolf, a hen; and a bag of seed; writing in cursive.
Things childhood did not prepare me for: the concept of budgeting; finding a place to live; responding to a coup.
Alas.
Things childhood did not prepare me for: the concept of budgeting; finding a place to live; responding to a coup.
Alas.
Please, I'm begging you to convince them that microplastics are woke. Tell them microplastics are just difficult to see pronouns. Microplastics are the DEI of plastics.
February 12, 2025 at 4:42 AM
Please, I'm begging you to convince them that microplastics are woke. Tell them microplastics are just difficult to see pronouns. Microplastics are the DEI of plastics.
I love Mary J Blige. I think she's a genius, but I think it is time we address the elephant in the room: she was wrong, and we absolutely need some hateration in this dancery. The jury is still out on holleration, but it is not looking good.
February 11, 2025 at 12:10 AM
I love Mary J Blige. I think she's a genius, but I think it is time we address the elephant in the room: she was wrong, and we absolutely need some hateration in this dancery. The jury is still out on holleration, but it is not looking good.