William Garrison
@williamgarrison.bsky.social
IT Manager @ Georgia Tech. Husband and father of two. I enjoy skateboarding, soccer, Magic: the Gathering, pickleball, video games.
Ren fairs have a little bit of everything: furries, cops with Santa hats, and a full body Grinch suit with working mouth. Love it.
November 29, 2025 at 10:09 PM
Ren fairs have a little bit of everything: furries, cops with Santa hats, and a full body Grinch suit with working mouth. Love it.
At 6:07pm on 6/7/26, every child should run outside and yell “Six Seven!”
November 29, 2025 at 3:29 PM
At 6:07pm on 6/7/26, every child should run outside and yell “Six Seven!”
Reposted by William Garrison
the ending of this explainer might surprise you
August 3, 2025 at 2:22 PM
the ending of this explainer might surprise you
It's really hard to say what my wife does for a living.
She sells seashells by the seashore.
She sells seashells by the seashore.
June 22, 2025 at 2:44 PM
It's really hard to say what my wife does for a living.
She sells seashells by the seashore.
She sells seashells by the seashore.
I went to go shopping for cherries and microphones the other day: bought a bing, bought a boom.
June 14, 2025 at 1:17 PM
I went to go shopping for cherries and microphones the other day: bought a bing, bought a boom.
RFKs new committee:
June 9, 2025 at 10:22 PM
RFKs new committee:
A Mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of three.
"Uno... dos..." And poof, he vanished without a tres.
"Uno... dos..." And poof, he vanished without a tres.
June 6, 2025 at 11:42 AM
A Mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of three.
"Uno... dos..." And poof, he vanished without a tres.
"Uno... dos..." And poof, he vanished without a tres.
It’s a shame they don’t built a lot of things here in the US anymore…
I bought a new TV and it said “Built in Roku,” I don’t even know where that is!
I bought a new TV and it said “Built in Roku,” I don’t even know where that is!
June 6, 2025 at 11:40 AM
It’s a shame they don’t built a lot of things here in the US anymore…
I bought a new TV and it said “Built in Roku,” I don’t even know where that is!
I bought a new TV and it said “Built in Roku,” I don’t even know where that is!
What kind of prize do you give someone who hasn't moved a muscle in a year?
A trophy.
A trophy.
June 5, 2025 at 11:46 AM
What kind of prize do you give someone who hasn't moved a muscle in a year?
A trophy.
A trophy.
I had my leg X-rayed today.
The doctor said: 'Your patella measures 2.54cm.'
I said: 'Inch-high knees?'
He replied: '您的髌骨是2.54厘米高.'
The doctor said: 'Your patella measures 2.54cm.'
I said: 'Inch-high knees?'
He replied: '您的髌骨是2.54厘米高.'
June 4, 2025 at 11:43 AM
I had my leg X-rayed today.
The doctor said: 'Your patella measures 2.54cm.'
I said: 'Inch-high knees?'
He replied: '您的髌骨是2.54厘米高.'
The doctor said: 'Your patella measures 2.54cm.'
I said: 'Inch-high knees?'
He replied: '您的髌骨是2.54厘米高.'
Bye, Felicia
UPDATE: Elon Musk is leaving the Department of Government Efficiency effort. His 130 day tenure was marked by legal setbacks, overstated savings claims and little evidence DOGE made things more efficient.
Elon Musk is leaving the federal government. What's next for DOGE?
Elon Musk is leaving the Department of Government Efficiency effort. His 130 day tenure was marked by legal setbacks, overstated savings claims and little evidence DOGE made things more efficient.
n.pr
May 30, 2025 at 8:29 PM
Bye, Felicia
How do you tell a chemist from a communist?
Ask them to pronounce “unionized.”
Ask them to pronounce “unionized.”
May 24, 2025 at 12:30 PM
How do you tell a chemist from a communist?
Ask them to pronounce “unionized.”
Ask them to pronounce “unionized.”
Looks weird and creepy and interesting, I dig it.
May 20, 2025 at 2:35 PM
Looks weird and creepy and interesting, I dig it.
S49E02 [2]
YouTube video by SNL Hosts Introducing the Musical Guest
www.youtube.com
May 15, 2025 at 5:04 PM
This is a classic joke to open with.
May 9, 2025 at 2:19 PM
This is a classic joke to open with.
Capitalism is getting out of hand.
May 9, 2025 at 2:19 PM
Capitalism is getting out of hand.
The world tongue-twister champion just got arrested.
I hear they're gonna give him a tough sentence.
I hear they're gonna give him a tough sentence.
April 23, 2025 at 12:25 PM
The world tongue-twister champion just got arrested.
I hear they're gonna give him a tough sentence.
I hear they're gonna give him a tough sentence.
Trump continues to hire the best people, I said sarcastically.
BREAKING NEWS: The White House has begun the process of looking for a new secretary of defense, according to a U.S. official who was not authorized to speak publicly.
The White House has begun process of looking for new secretary of defense
The White House has begun the process of looking for a new secretary of defense, according to a U.S. official who was not authorized to speak publicly.
www.npr.org
April 21, 2025 at 6:18 PM
Trump continues to hire the best people, I said sarcastically.
Thoughts and prayers.
Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem's bag — including $3000 in cash — was stolen, a DHS spokesperson confirms.
Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem's bag was stolen — including $3000 in cash, spokesperson says
A DHS spokesperson said Noem was carrying a large amount of cash "to treat her family to dinner, activities, and Easter gifts."
nbcnews.to
April 21, 2025 at 6:16 PM
Thoughts and prayers.
Without a doubt, my favorite Robin Williams movie is Mrs. Fire.
April 19, 2025 at 12:56 PM
Without a doubt, my favorite Robin Williams movie is Mrs. Fire.