Of course Anvil had to give their stupid ass gunship an enormous thigh gap. You could thread a fuckin fury between those things god damn!

Crazy how the designers at Mirai decided to restrict the sick ass crystal dome screen cockpit to the least useful, longest range Fury variant when it not only looks so much nicer than the stupid glass bubble but would also protect the super exposed pilot from gunfire during dogfights. #StarCitizen

Everyone thinks the Drake Ironclad is a cargo freighter/pirate carrier but really it’s meant to be landed upside down over other people’s bases with the roof open so you can watch them like bugs in a terrarium. #StarCitizen

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a creature so miserable as the Crusader Intrepid, it was made to die but August Dunlow’s dickrider cult will force this suffering beast to strain for their amusement. The humane thing to do would be to blow up Orison so no more Intrepids have to suffer the curse of life.

Sorry RSI (Really Stupid Inventions) likers but the Polaris looks like shit because of the stupid buck-teeth lookin cockpit at the front. Every real capital ship has a proper bridge but the Polaris tried to defy what is morally good and right in favor of looking like it was designed by a 3 year old

Could the trademark MISC wiener ship shape be a byproduct of the Xi’an lend lease? Do the Xi’an have a thing for humans?

The new Drake concept silhouette looks like someone let Shou Tucker go nuts with a Corsair and a Cutter.
#starcitizen

The second maelstrom comes online it is every Drake Herald owners moral obligation to fly their wretched rocket directly into the nearest planet to see if it becomes a 2 dimensional object. #starcitizen

In the same way that horny internet freaks desire to have their heads crushed between the thighs of a muscular woman. I wish only to be squashed between the powerful, sexy, industrious salvage booms of a Drake Vulture.

Holy moly oh my goodness gracious. Why didn’t ARGO call this thing the GYATTLS. You know that things ass huge from liftin 32 SCU boxes all day long gyatt damn.

If I was any kind of flying space creature, no higher power could stop me from careening straight into the enormous, voluptuous, bird-strikeable intakes of a Crusader Hercules Starlifter.

Recent Spectrum surveys have shown that criminals apprehended by bounty hunters using the Anvil Hawk show a disproportionately high chance of developing bondage related fetishes later in life. Whether or not Anvil will capitalize on this lucrative market is unknown.

The Reclaimer’s claw makes for a great makeshift slaughterhouse if you can put up the squelching noise produced when it disintegrates an entire herd of quasi grazers and sucks them up into the salvage processor.

Whoever at ARGO decided that only the flaccid front turret on the MOLE should get to have air and that the side turrets should should be open to the vacuum of space deserves to be locked in the hold of a MPUV-1C and flown into the nearest star as payback for all the miners they suffocated.

Tryna eat dinner in my Drake Interplanetary Shitbox but all my food keeps falling through the damn table. Anden Arden owes me 10 AUEC for a new Double Dog and a Cruz Lux.