em 🌩️🦊
@slightestwind.bsky.social
the worst love song you've ever heard
🔞|| 🏳️🌈 || uk || 35 || they/she
https://linktr.ee/captainolimar
🔞|| 🏳️🌈 || uk || 35 || they/she
https://linktr.ee/captainolimar
Pinned
em 🌩️🦊
@slightestwind.bsky.social
· May 26
for #ofmdzineweek, extracts from the sketchbook of edward teach, scout's watch fire lookout, summer 2022
Lungs is in the process of turning two, and seven point three miles turns three in a few weeks time, and I want to believe I have the capacity to write something to celebrate ONE of these two, considering they feel like my keystone fics, but ALAS. I continue to wish my writing back 😭
November 14, 2025 at 4:09 PM
Lungs is in the process of turning two, and seven point three miles turns three in a few weeks time, and I want to believe I have the capacity to write something to celebrate ONE of these two, considering they feel like my keystone fics, but ALAS. I continue to wish my writing back 😭
For those keeping track, em jr will be assigned female at birth! And she kept her chin tucked to her chest for her entire scan regardless of how much we harassed her so we have to go back for a rescan 🙃 I'm growing a stubborn, shy, wiggly kid.
November 13, 2025 at 3:35 PM
For those keeping track, em jr will be assigned female at birth! And she kept her chin tucked to her chest for her entire scan regardless of how much we harassed her so we have to go back for a rescan 🙃 I'm growing a stubborn, shy, wiggly kid.
Some nice things in the hellscape:
Baby is officially half baked on Saturday and 20wk scan tomorrow
Kids at school are being uncharacteristically cooperative recently
I am cooking a giant Bolognese right now to eat with pasta bowties and garlic bread
My cat is cute always
Baby is officially half baked on Saturday and 20wk scan tomorrow
Kids at school are being uncharacteristically cooperative recently
I am cooking a giant Bolognese right now to eat with pasta bowties and garlic bread
My cat is cute always
November 12, 2025 at 4:43 PM
Some nice things in the hellscape:
Baby is officially half baked on Saturday and 20wk scan tomorrow
Kids at school are being uncharacteristically cooperative recently
I am cooking a giant Bolognese right now to eat with pasta bowties and garlic bread
My cat is cute always
Baby is officially half baked on Saturday and 20wk scan tomorrow
Kids at school are being uncharacteristically cooperative recently
I am cooking a giant Bolognese right now to eat with pasta bowties and garlic bread
My cat is cute always
Cannot recommend grieving a close family member while pregnant. It gets to 6.30 in the evening and I am emotionally and physically DONE with the day but nowhere near tired enough to go to sleep so I'm just idk, drifting through the last few hours before bed 🫠
November 11, 2025 at 6:53 PM
Cannot recommend grieving a close family member while pregnant. It gets to 6.30 in the evening and I am emotionally and physically DONE with the day but nowhere near tired enough to go to sleep so I'm just idk, drifting through the last few hours before bed 🫠
Seems excessive but I'll take it
November 9, 2025 at 9:02 AM
Seems excessive but I'll take it
My nana passed last night. And I don't know how to measure sadness but I know this is the most I've felt in my entire life.
November 8, 2025 at 11:01 AM
My nana passed last night. And I don't know how to measure sadness but I know this is the most I've felt in my entire life.
Mum last Friday: nanny is very unwell and won't get better, go visit her this weekend while she still recognises you.
Monday: nanny has brightened up and is looking much better today!
Today: nanny is on palliative care and all treatment has been withdrawn.
So. There we go.
Monday: nanny has brightened up and is looking much better today!
Today: nanny is on palliative care and all treatment has been withdrawn.
So. There we go.
November 6, 2025 at 5:06 PM
Mum last Friday: nanny is very unwell and won't get better, go visit her this weekend while she still recognises you.
Monday: nanny has brightened up and is looking much better today!
Today: nanny is on palliative care and all treatment has been withdrawn.
So. There we go.
Monday: nanny has brightened up and is looking much better today!
Today: nanny is on palliative care and all treatment has been withdrawn.
So. There we go.
Some things are evergreen and by some things I mean alexis in schitt's creek 3x04 driving test. People aren't thinking about you the way you're thinking about you. Nobody cares. (/pos)
October 29, 2025 at 1:52 PM
Some things are evergreen and by some things I mean alexis in schitt's creek 3x04 driving test. People aren't thinking about you the way you're thinking about you. Nobody cares. (/pos)
GENUINELY DEVASTATED 😭 a soup I loved and have been craving for WEEKS has had the recipe changed and now it is full of spring onion 😭 I didn't check before buying 2 tubs, opened one just now for lunch and I am ASSAULTED by the smell I could genuinely cry
October 27, 2025 at 12:34 PM
GENUINELY DEVASTATED 😭 a soup I loved and have been craving for WEEKS has had the recipe changed and now it is full of spring onion 😭 I didn't check before buying 2 tubs, opened one just now for lunch and I am ASSAULTED by the smell I could genuinely cry
I want to knit myself a baby blanket but the issue is if it's not knit or purl I am wildly out of my depth and I have NO PATIENCE to try and learn anything new right now 😤
October 26, 2025 at 5:40 PM
I want to knit myself a baby blanket but the issue is if it's not knit or purl I am wildly out of my depth and I have NO PATIENCE to try and learn anything new right now 😤
On a train to London half full of people going to MCM (including a guy in a full Mando costume) but because life comes at you fast we are instead on our way to BABYCON 👶(not a joke. We're gonna try out so many buggies on the buggy obstacle course)
October 25, 2025 at 8:26 AM
On a train to London half full of people going to MCM (including a guy in a full Mando costume) but because life comes at you fast we are instead on our way to BABYCON 👶(not a joke. We're gonna try out so many buggies on the buggy obstacle course)
I personally think I am god's strongest soldier for surviving this entire 8 week term whilst in the depths of the first trimester/early second trimester trenches with only ONE SINGLE SICK DAY. god's strongest fucking soldier.
October 23, 2025 at 4:56 PM
I personally think I am god's strongest soldier for surviving this entire 8 week term whilst in the depths of the first trimester/early second trimester trenches with only ONE SINGLE SICK DAY. god's strongest fucking soldier.
Psyching myself up to ask to resign from the leadership part of my job because I'm so fed up of carrying other people's ineptitude that I'll just deal with the fact that it will fuck me financially for the next year. I'm just so done.
October 21, 2025 at 5:38 PM
Psyching myself up to ask to resign from the leadership part of my job because I'm so fed up of carrying other people's ineptitude that I'll just deal with the fact that it will fuck me financially for the next year. I'm just so done.
I don't wish to alarm anyone but
October 19, 2025 at 11:53 AM
I don't wish to alarm anyone but
I am running out of plausible bump deniability and will soon have to tell the kids that no, it's not a result of mcds opening 10 mins from the school, it is, in fact, a baby. And the issue with that is that there isn't a single child in my school (secondary) that doesn't know how babies are made 🙃
October 17, 2025 at 2:17 PM
I am running out of plausible bump deniability and will soon have to tell the kids that no, it's not a result of mcds opening 10 mins from the school, it is, in fact, a baby. And the issue with that is that there isn't a single child in my school (secondary) that doesn't know how babies are made 🙃
Had a checkup this morning (all good, fetus very cooperative 👍) but now I am at work and I swear, just BEING IN the school building drains all energy from me. Banter central with the midwife, now I am sitting at my desk desperate for a nap 😭
October 15, 2025 at 9:45 AM
Had a checkup this morning (all good, fetus very cooperative 👍) but now I am at work and I swear, just BEING IN the school building drains all energy from me. Banter central with the midwife, now I am sitting at my desk desperate for a nap 😭
Great news on the writing front! I've upgraded from considering wiping my WIP from the face of the earth (ao3) to reading everything I have that's currently unpublished, and writing the rest of the chapter in my head?? Great success! (Still need to get something down on paper, but baby steps!)
October 12, 2025 at 6:34 PM
Great news on the writing front! I've upgraded from considering wiping my WIP from the face of the earth (ao3) to reading everything I have that's currently unpublished, and writing the rest of the chapter in my head?? Great success! (Still need to get something down on paper, but baby steps!)
It's 6.45 in the morning and I'm just laying in bed thinking I could absolutely demolish a roast dinner right about now. No energy to cook one, I just want to eat it.
October 5, 2025 at 5:46 AM
It's 6.45 in the morning and I'm just laying in bed thinking I could absolutely demolish a roast dinner right about now. No energy to cook one, I just want to eat it.
Well now I absolutely need a rock/popstar ed fic in which he writes an entirely unnecessary, cringe, and very much not asked for song about how his new boyfriend's massive dick changed his life.
October 4, 2025 at 6:44 PM
Well now I absolutely need a rock/popstar ed fic in which he writes an entirely unnecessary, cringe, and very much not asked for song about how his new boyfriend's massive dick changed his life.
Karaoke sex chicken sequel except it's 5 times ed and stede managed to toe the line of public sex offences at jackie'z and the one time they broke an all time record for both Jackie penalty points and the length of their resulting ban ✌️
September 28, 2025 at 6:18 PM
Karaoke sex chicken sequel except it's 5 times ed and stede managed to toe the line of public sex offences at jackie'z and the one time they broke an all time record for both Jackie penalty points and the length of their resulting ban ✌️
How's pregnancy going you ask? Well, I just spent 10 minutes sitting on the kitchen floor uncontrollably sobbing because I accidentally broke the little bowl I made in my first proper ceramics class that my cat eats her treats from 😔
September 27, 2025 at 8:54 AM
How's pregnancy going you ask? Well, I just spent 10 minutes sitting on the kitchen floor uncontrollably sobbing because I accidentally broke the little bowl I made in my first proper ceramics class that my cat eats her treats from 😔
Mr em has covid 🙃✌️
September 26, 2025 at 6:42 PM
Mr em has covid 🙃✌️
My "growing a new human is very tiring" afternoon lay downs have become such a staple of my day that I am now the proud owner of a special sofa duvet set and memory foam pillow I can have "actual rest, not just sad lay downs" - direct quote from Mr Em
September 21, 2025 at 2:48 PM
My "growing a new human is very tiring" afternoon lay downs have become such a staple of my day that I am now the proud owner of a special sofa duvet set and memory foam pillow I can have "actual rest, not just sad lay downs" - direct quote from Mr Em
Hello I am pleased to announce that despite Dr Doom's empathy lacking not-diagnosis back in August, we have now confirmed, with the help of the most lovely sonographer, a kiwifruit sized em jr with all the right parts a baby should have at this stage of growing 😌
September 18, 2025 at 4:16 PM
Hello I am pleased to announce that despite Dr Doom's empathy lacking not-diagnosis back in August, we have now confirmed, with the help of the most lovely sonographer, a kiwifruit sized em jr with all the right parts a baby should have at this stage of growing 😌
Perhaps this is quite niche but I have caught up with the sewing bee and to say I am shocked, appalled, and deeply upset would be an understatement
September 11, 2025 at 4:54 PM
Perhaps this is quite niche but I have caught up with the sewing bee and to say I am shocked, appalled, and deeply upset would be an understatement