Simon
@simonwe1ss.bsky.social
professionally not a moron // The Arsenal
Pinned
Traffic cop in training Simon Hooper just had to sent off Lacey there, didn't he?
But since they don't know nuance nor critical thinking they can only do what the manual (aka the Howard Webbinar) tells them to do.
But since they don't know nuance nor critical thinking they can only do what the manual (aka the Howard Webbinar) tells them to do.
January 11, 2026 at 7:05 PM
Traffic cop in training Simon Hooper just had to sent off Lacey there, didn't he?
But since they don't know nuance nor critical thinking they can only do what the manual (aka the Howard Webbinar) tells them to do.
But since they don't know nuance nor critical thinking they can only do what the manual (aka the Howard Webbinar) tells them to do.
Death, taxes, Wele scoring at OT in the FA Cup
January 11, 2026 at 5:52 PM
Death, taxes, Wele scoring at OT in the FA Cup
Can we please get another corner from the right
I want to see something
I want to see something
January 11, 2026 at 3:32 PM
Can we please get another corner from the right
I want to see something
I want to see something
Don't care that Timber is more polished or that White's peak physical time is over, Benjamin will continue to move me more.
That blatant push without getting carded after getting megged?
Can't teach that.
Elite.
That blatant push without getting carded after getting megged?
Can't teach that.
Elite.
January 11, 2026 at 3:30 PM
Don't care that Timber is more polished or that White's peak physical time is over, Benjamin will continue to move me more.
That blatant push without getting carded after getting megged?
Can't teach that.
Elite.
That blatant push without getting carded after getting megged?
Can't teach that.
Elite.
Team spirit looking good though.
Gabriel Jesus working hard to make sure Gyökeres isn't feeling like the worst Arsenal striker.
Gabriel Jesus working hard to make sure Gyökeres isn't feeling like the worst Arsenal striker.
January 11, 2026 at 3:04 PM
Team spirit looking good though.
Gabriel Jesus working hard to make sure Gyökeres isn't feeling like the worst Arsenal striker.
Gabriel Jesus working hard to make sure Gyökeres isn't feeling like the worst Arsenal striker.
That Nwaneri fella
He's good. Positive.
We should play him more
He's good. Positive.
We should play him more
January 11, 2026 at 2:55 PM
That Nwaneri fella
He's good. Positive.
We should play him more
He's good. Positive.
We should play him more
What is this?
A fun starting XI
In this economy?
A fun starting XI
In this economy?
January 11, 2026 at 1:01 PM
What is this?
A fun starting XI
In this economy?
A fun starting XI
In this economy?
City giving 'Well done, he's 13' vibes
January 10, 2026 at 4:53 PM
City giving 'Well done, he's 13' vibes
Predictable Subs Football Club
January 10, 2026 at 2:32 PM
Predictable Subs Football Club
The Noni chance was actually well designed.
Jesus drags one CB high, Timber pushes up.
But as so often, it's just bad pathing from the attackers as they all go after the same space.
Given it's a set-play, could even argue Martinelli (apart from the wrong run) should be way higher to begin with.
Jesus drags one CB high, Timber pushes up.
But as so often, it's just bad pathing from the attackers as they all go after the same space.
Given it's a set-play, could even argue Martinelli (apart from the wrong run) should be way higher to begin with.
January 9, 2026 at 12:23 PM
The Noni chance was actually well designed.
Jesus drags one CB high, Timber pushes up.
But as so often, it's just bad pathing from the attackers as they all go after the same space.
Given it's a set-play, could even argue Martinelli (apart from the wrong run) should be way higher to begin with.
Jesus drags one CB high, Timber pushes up.
But as so often, it's just bad pathing from the attackers as they all go after the same space.
Given it's a set-play, could even argue Martinelli (apart from the wrong run) should be way higher to begin with.
Gyökeres takes 2.02 shots per game.
Haaland is on 3.95. Last season Gyökeres was on 4.08
Gyökeres gets 0.63 shots on target per game.
Haaland is on 1.88. Last season VG was on 2.12
Gyökeres gets 31% of his shots on target.
Haaland is on 48%. Last season VG was on 52%
Shot map not looking pretty
Haaland is on 3.95. Last season Gyökeres was on 4.08
Gyökeres gets 0.63 shots on target per game.
Haaland is on 1.88. Last season VG was on 2.12
Gyökeres gets 31% of his shots on target.
Haaland is on 48%. Last season VG was on 52%
Shot map not looking pretty
January 9, 2026 at 11:03 AM
Gyökeres takes 2.02 shots per game.
Haaland is on 3.95. Last season Gyökeres was on 4.08
Gyökeres gets 0.63 shots on target per game.
Haaland is on 1.88. Last season VG was on 2.12
Gyökeres gets 31% of his shots on target.
Haaland is on 48%. Last season VG was on 52%
Shot map not looking pretty
Haaland is on 3.95. Last season Gyökeres was on 4.08
Gyökeres gets 0.63 shots on target per game.
Haaland is on 1.88. Last season VG was on 2.12
Gyökeres gets 31% of his shots on target.
Haaland is on 48%. Last season VG was on 52%
Shot map not looking pretty
Was Martinelli bang out of line? Sure
But this pretending now that he's the first and last to ever do it is so boring. It happens all the time, nobody cares then.
But this pretending now that he's the first and last to ever do it is so boring. It happens all the time, nobody cares then.
January 9, 2026 at 8:47 AM
Was Martinelli bang out of line? Sure
But this pretending now that he's the first and last to ever do it is so boring. It happens all the time, nobody cares then.
But this pretending now that he's the first and last to ever do it is so boring. It happens all the time, nobody cares then.
January 8, 2026 at 10:25 PM
Can only hope that MLS is able to play himself into form in case we actually need him in the side consistently.
Worryingly far off the required pace.
And for no apparent reason.
He wasn't that clueless defensively last year.
Worryingly far off the required pace.
And for no apparent reason.
He wasn't that clueless defensively last year.
January 8, 2026 at 10:19 PM
Can only hope that MLS is able to play himself into form in case we actually need him in the side consistently.
Worryingly far off the required pace.
And for no apparent reason.
He wasn't that clueless defensively last year.
Worryingly far off the required pace.
And for no apparent reason.
He wasn't that clueless defensively last year.
Objectively:
Liverpool fixture done while keeping the points gap steady.
Good.
Subjectively:
Missed opportunity.
Felt managed - ultimately gave them too much respect like as if it's a fine result to draw with the champions.
Final bit of belief went with MLS coming on.
Liverpool fixture done while keeping the points gap steady.
Good.
Subjectively:
Missed opportunity.
Felt managed - ultimately gave them too much respect like as if it's a fine result to draw with the champions.
Final bit of belief went with MLS coming on.
January 8, 2026 at 9:57 PM
Objectively:
Liverpool fixture done while keeping the points gap steady.
Good.
Subjectively:
Missed opportunity.
Felt managed - ultimately gave them too much respect like as if it's a fine result to draw with the champions.
Final bit of belief went with MLS coming on.
Liverpool fixture done while keeping the points gap steady.
Good.
Subjectively:
Missed opportunity.
Felt managed - ultimately gave them too much respect like as if it's a fine result to draw with the champions.
Final bit of belief went with MLS coming on.
Pretty decent bar that one whoops moment
Follows the trend of first half approaches, expecting just that half pace quicker second half.
Follows the trend of first half approaches, expecting just that half pace quicker second half.
January 8, 2026 at 8:48 PM
Pretty decent bar that one whoops moment
Follows the trend of first half approaches, expecting just that half pace quicker second half.
Follows the trend of first half approaches, expecting just that half pace quicker second half.
Can this man go one day without providing Arsenal content?
xD
xD
January 7, 2026 at 10:22 PM
Can this man go one day without providing Arsenal content?
xD
xD
Tomorrow is the greatest opportunity in the history of great opportunities.
January 7, 2026 at 9:26 PM
Tomorrow is the greatest opportunity in the history of great opportunities.
Same guy in 2018.
Before figuring out that instead of calling for said oversight he could exploit the lack of for personal gain and profit.
Before figuring out that instead of calling for said oversight he could exploit the lack of for personal gain and profit.
January 7, 2026 at 12:27 PM
Same guy in 2018.
Before figuring out that instead of calling for said oversight he could exploit the lack of for personal gain and profit.
Before figuring out that instead of calling for said oversight he could exploit the lack of for personal gain and profit.
"it’s vital to deter our adversaries in the Arctic region"
The adversaries in question
The adversaries in question
a polar bear standing on its hind legs on a beach
ALT: a polar bear standing on its hind legs on a beach
media.tenor.com
January 7, 2026 at 9:58 AM
"it’s vital to deter our adversaries in the Arctic region"
The adversaries in question
The adversaries in question
Can we just finally sign Cerci so we can all move on?
January 6, 2026 at 10:29 AM
Can we just finally sign Cerci so we can all move on?
Non-contact tibia break - talk about unlucky for Gvardiol
January 5, 2026 at 7:28 PM
Non-contact tibia break - talk about unlucky for Gvardiol
Five films I watched 2025 that I enjoyed and that provided something out of the ordinary.
One Battle After Another
September 5
Warfare
Train Dreams
Number 24
One Battle After Another
September 5
Warfare
Train Dreams
Number 24
January 5, 2026 at 1:15 PM
Five films I watched 2025 that I enjoyed and that provided something out of the ordinary.
One Battle After Another
September 5
Warfare
Train Dreams
Number 24
One Battle After Another
September 5
Warfare
Train Dreams
Number 24