Shorter David Brooks
@shorterbrooks.bsky.social
Reducing every David Brooks column down to one sentence since 2023 (though on Bluesky only since 2025). Parody.
Human consciousness is crazy complicated (but I still think Republicans go to church and Democrats went to Woodstock).
www.nytimes.com/2026/01/16/o...
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Opinion | This Is How Your Mind Works
www.nytimes.com
January 16, 2026 at 12:58 PM
Human consciousness is crazy complicated (but I still think Republicans go to church and Democrats went to Woodstock).
www.nytimes.com/2026/01/16/o...
www.nytimes.com/2026/01/16/o...
We are experiencing historic levels of villainy, mendacity, violence, and terror from the likes of Donald Trump, Vladimir Putin, Xi Jinping, and [ inaudible muttering ] – You know, both sides! www.nytimes.com/2026/01/09/o...
Opinion | The Sins of the Moderates
www.nytimes.com
January 9, 2026 at 1:04 PM
We are experiencing historic levels of villainy, mendacity, violence, and terror from the likes of Donald Trump, Vladimir Putin, Xi Jinping, and [ inaudible muttering ] – You know, both sides! www.nytimes.com/2026/01/09/o...
It’s 2026, and I *still* think there’s 2 types of people in the world: church-going libertarians (aka “conservatives”) and atheistic libertines (“liberals”).
www.nytimes.com/2026/01/02/o...
www.nytimes.com/2026/01/02/o...
Opinion | We’re Living Through the Great Detachment
www.nytimes.com
January 2, 2026 at 3:22 PM
It’s 2026, and I *still* think there’s 2 types of people in the world: church-going libertarians (aka “conservatives”) and atheistic libertines (“liberals”).
www.nytimes.com/2026/01/02/o...
www.nytimes.com/2026/01/02/o...
I can do a full week's work in 30 minutes.
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/26/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/26/o...
Opinion | Sick of Trump News? I’m Here for You.
www.nytimes.com
December 27, 2025 at 8:07 PM
I can do a full week's work in 30 minutes.
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/26/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/26/o...
Well, damnit.
I am not looking forward to learning which of my very good friends are in the files
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/21/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/21/o...
Opinion | The Epstein Story? Count Me Out.
www.nytimes.com
December 18, 2025 at 10:10 PM
Well, damnit.
People keep saying that the American Dream is a lie, but as George Constanza teaches us: It’s not a lie if you believe it.
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/28/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/28/o...
Opinion | What I Love When I Love America
www.nytimes.com
November 30, 2025 at 5:41 PM
People keep saying that the American Dream is a lie, but as George Constanza teaches us: It’s not a lie if you believe it.
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/28/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/28/o...
I am not looking forward to learning which of my very good friends are in the files
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/21/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/21/o...
Opinion | The Epstein Story? Count Me Out.
www.nytimes.com
November 21, 2025 at 2:08 PM
I am not looking forward to learning which of my very good friends are in the files
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/21/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/21/o...
I have never heard of progressive or left wing Christianity.
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/13/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/13/o...
Opinion | How to Replace Christian Nationalism
www.nytimes.com
November 14, 2025 at 2:49 PM
I have never heard of progressive or left wing Christianity.
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/13/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/13/o...
If I may borrow and adapt a popular idiom from the Generation Z lexicon: Predators gonna predate.
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/07/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/07/o...
Opinion | Imagining What’s in Trump’s Brain
www.nytimes.com
November 10, 2025 at 6:18 PM
If I may borrow and adapt a popular idiom from the Generation Z lexicon: Predators gonna predate.
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/07/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/07/o...
If there’s a difference between racists and antiracists, communists and capitalists, liars and critical theorists, trolls and activists, idiots and philosophers, well, I can’t see it.
www.nytimes.com/2025/10/30/o...
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Opinion | Hey, Lefties! Trump Has Stolen Your Game.
www.nytimes.com
October 30, 2025 at 11:32 PM
If there’s a difference between racists and antiracists, communists and capitalists, liars and critical theorists, trolls and activists, idiots and philosophers, well, I can’t see it.
www.nytimes.com/2025/10/30/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/10/30/o...
Shame on the Democrats for talking about kitchen table issues when they should be protecting democracy by criticizing themselves.
www.nytimes.com/2025/10/23/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/10/23/o...
Opinion | The Rot Creeping Into Our Minds
www.nytimes.com
October 24, 2025 at 11:59 AM
Shame on the Democrats for talking about kitchen table issues when they should be protecting democracy by criticizing themselves.
www.nytimes.com/2025/10/23/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/10/23/o...
I didn't have time to write a column this week but don't vote for Mamdani because [insert reason here] www.nytimes.com/2025/10/23/o...
Opinion | Trump Has a Religion. What Do Democrats Have?
www.nytimes.com
October 23, 2025 at 10:09 PM
I didn't have time to write a column this week but don't vote for Mamdani because [insert reason here] www.nytimes.com/2025/10/23/o...
You'll never guess which party it was that went off the rails in 2015! www.nytimes.com/2025/10/09/o...
Opinion | Why Are the Democrats Increasing Inequality?
www.nytimes.com
October 10, 2025 at 10:19 AM
You'll never guess which party it was that went off the rails in 2015! www.nytimes.com/2025/10/09/o...
If you watch some very specific highlights from the Kirk memorial, you can begin to believe in a kind of Christian Nationalism that isn't just racism, vengeance, and psychopathy
www.nytimes.com/2025/09/25/o...
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Opinion | We Need to Think Straight About God and Politics
www.nytimes.com
September 27, 2025 at 11:03 AM
If you watch some very specific highlights from the Kirk memorial, you can begin to believe in a kind of Christian Nationalism that isn't just racism, vengeance, and psychopathy
www.nytimes.com/2025/09/25/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/09/25/o...
I am now prepared to endorse Barack Obama for President in the 2008 Presidential Election
www.nytimes.com/2025/09/18/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/09/18/o...
Opinion | The Era of Dark Passions
www.nytimes.com
September 19, 2025 at 1:20 PM
I am now prepared to endorse Barack Obama for President in the 2008 Presidential Election
www.nytimes.com/2025/09/18/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/09/18/o...
People (*cough* Mamdani) who want to help poor people get food and medicine are amoral, and probably immoral.
www.nytimes.com/2025/09/05/o...
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Opinion | Why I Am Not a Liberal
www.nytimes.com
September 5, 2025 at 5:38 PM
People (*cough* Mamdani) who want to help poor people get food and medicine are amoral, and probably immoral.
www.nytimes.com/2025/09/05/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/09/05/o...
I found 5 randos on the internet, and they confirm my theory that people are selfish.
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/28/o...
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Opinion | The Wrong Definition of Love
www.nytimes.com
August 30, 2025 at 10:49 AM
I found 5 randos on the internet, and they confirm my theory that people are selfish.
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/28/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/28/o...
I know that universities are not overrun by woke postmodern orthodoxy (whatever that is), but if some nihilistic liars claim they are then we really have no choice but to believe them.
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/21/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/21/o...
Opinion | The Rise of Right-Wing Nihilism
www.nytimes.com
August 28, 2025 at 2:03 PM
I know that universities are not overrun by woke postmodern orthodoxy (whatever that is), but if some nihilistic liars claim they are then we really have no choice but to believe them.
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/21/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/21/o...
I challenged myself to write an essay explaining the evils of capitalism without mentioning capitalism.
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/14/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/14/o...
Opinion | America’s New Segregation
www.nytimes.com
August 15, 2025 at 10:47 AM
I challenged myself to write an essay explaining the evils of capitalism without mentioning capitalism.
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/14/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/14/o...
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: people happy with the way things are going tend to be more conservative; people unhappy about it tend to want change.
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/07/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/07/o...
Opinion | Why More People in the World Are Feeling Hopeful (Except Us)
www.nytimes.com
August 8, 2025 at 8:30 PM
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: people happy with the way things are going tend to be more conservative; people unhappy about it tend to want change.
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/07/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/08/07/o...
The American people have been seduced by a deranged racist billionaire, therefore the Democrats need to stop talking about truth, race, or inequality .
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/31/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/31/o...
Opinion | The Crucial Issue of the 21st Century
www.nytimes.com
August 1, 2025 at 12:01 PM
The American people have been seduced by a deranged racist billionaire, therefore the Democrats need to stop talking about truth, race, or inequality .
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/31/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/31/o...
Here's 5 ways in which the current US president is a Grade A jerk; my current wife (and former student) is much better and you should read her work.
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/24/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/24/o...
Opinion | Be Careful About What You Want
www.nytimes.com
July 25, 2025 at 3:00 PM
Here's 5 ways in which the current US president is a Grade A jerk; my current wife (and former student) is much better and you should read her work.
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/24/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/24/o...
If a candidate ran on hope, I would definitely vote for them. (A previous version of this columnist criticized candidates for running hope. I regret the error.)
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/17/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/17/o...
Opinion | Trump Is Winning the Race to the Bottom
www.nytimes.com
July 18, 2025 at 11:27 AM
If a candidate ran on hope, I would definitely vote for them. (A previous version of this columnist criticized candidates for running hope. I regret the error.)
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/17/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/17/o...
I preferred it when people like me who know how to appreciate Fine Art were recognized as a Cultural Elite and got the attention and admiration they deserve.
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/10/o...
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Opinion | When Novels Mattered
www.nytimes.com
July 11, 2025 at 2:52 PM
I preferred it when people like me who know how to appreciate Fine Art were recognized as a Cultural Elite and got the attention and admiration they deserve.
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/10/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/10/o...
Bibi and Trump are morally bankrupt barbarians. But I do at least admire their willingness to drop bombs on people in order to defend America’s God given right to drop bombs on people.
www.nytimes.com/2025/06/26/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/06/26/o...
Opinion | I Detest Netanyahu, but on Some Things He’s Actually Right
www.nytimes.com
June 27, 2025 at 10:46 AM
Bibi and Trump are morally bankrupt barbarians. But I do at least admire their willingness to drop bombs on people in order to defend America’s God given right to drop bombs on people.
www.nytimes.com/2025/06/26/o...
www.nytimes.com/2025/06/26/o...