The Swan
@shoelessjeff.bsky.social
Currently taking the shape of a swan on a lake.
Posts are presented as parody.
No shoes, please.
Posts are presented as parody.
No shoes, please.
Connections: Tree Farm Date Might End With Hot Chocolate
December 16, 2025 at 6:43 PM
Connections: Tree Farm Date Might End With Hot Chocolate
King Charles III Announces He Is Still Alive, From What One Hears During Crumpets
December 13, 2025 at 11:33 PM
King Charles III Announces He Is Still Alive, From What One Hears During Crumpets
Local Man Updates Dating Profile for Winter Weather Dates
December 13, 2025 at 11:32 PM
Local Man Updates Dating Profile for Winter Weather Dates
Christian Family Endures Backlash for Weaving Black Hawk Helicopter into Nativity Scene
December 12, 2025 at 1:15 AM
Christian Family Endures Backlash for Weaving Black Hawk Helicopter into Nativity Scene
Actual De Factual:
Actual:
General Mills is Producing 'Marty Supreme' Edition Wheaties Boxes.
*Factual:
Timothee Chalamet Thought the Shoot was for Lucky Charms.
Actual:
General Mills is Producing 'Marty Supreme' Edition Wheaties Boxes.
*Factual:
Timothee Chalamet Thought the Shoot was for Lucky Charms.
December 12, 2025 at 12:39 AM
Actual De Factual:
Actual:
General Mills is Producing 'Marty Supreme' Edition Wheaties Boxes.
*Factual:
Timothee Chalamet Thought the Shoot was for Lucky Charms.
Actual:
General Mills is Producing 'Marty Supreme' Edition Wheaties Boxes.
*Factual:
Timothee Chalamet Thought the Shoot was for Lucky Charms.
Actual de Factual: Studies Show Teens Sharing Public Steps Up to 12 hours a Day.
December 10, 2025 at 6:01 PM
Actual de Factual: Studies Show Teens Sharing Public Steps Up to 12 hours a Day.
Area Woman Sends Starbucks Gift Card to Ethiopian Farmer
December 10, 2025 at 5:56 PM
Area Woman Sends Starbucks Gift Card to Ethiopian Farmer
Australia Attempts Under 16 Ban of Social Media
"Crikey, that's a real frowny. Can I donate my old accounts to them?"
- Edie P.
"Crikey, that's a real frowny. Can I donate my old accounts to them?"
- Edie P.
December 9, 2025 at 6:52 PM
Australia Attempts Under 16 Ban of Social Media
"Crikey, that's a real frowny. Can I donate my old accounts to them?"
- Edie P.
"Crikey, that's a real frowny. Can I donate my old accounts to them?"
- Edie P.
Guillermo Del Toro Named to Direct Adaptation of Elegant, Yet Horrific Hostile Takeover of Warner Bros.
December 9, 2025 at 3:53 AM
Guillermo Del Toro Named to Direct Adaptation of Elegant, Yet Horrific Hostile Takeover of Warner Bros.
Cloud Dancer, 2025 Pantone Color of the Year, Facing Allegations for Not Being Truly Toned
December 9, 2025 at 2:19 AM
Cloud Dancer, 2025 Pantone Color of the Year, Facing Allegations for Not Being Truly Toned
The People Say: How Will YOU Spend Xmas With AI?
"I plan to let AI write all my cards, yule log, and draft my will. After that, we gonna get lit." - Nathaniel T.
"I plan to let AI write all my cards, yule log, and draft my will. After that, we gonna get lit." - Nathaniel T.
December 8, 2025 at 6:12 PM
The People Say: How Will YOU Spend Xmas With AI?
"I plan to let AI write all my cards, yule log, and draft my will. After that, we gonna get lit." - Nathaniel T.
"I plan to let AI write all my cards, yule log, and draft my will. After that, we gonna get lit." - Nathaniel T.
In Passing: God Taps Gehry To ReImagine Heaven's Gates
December 7, 2025 at 8:55 PM
In Passing: God Taps Gehry To ReImagine Heaven's Gates
Swan Insiders:
Join Us Our Chat with Real Life Jay Kelly, Accountant With No Meaningful Connection to Movies, and Cares Less Why He's Often Mistaken for Joaquin Phoenix.
Join Us Our Chat with Real Life Jay Kelly, Accountant With No Meaningful Connection to Movies, and Cares Less Why He's Often Mistaken for Joaquin Phoenix.
December 6, 2025 at 5:59 PM
Swan Insiders:
Join Us Our Chat with Real Life Jay Kelly, Accountant With No Meaningful Connection to Movies, and Cares Less Why He's Often Mistaken for Joaquin Phoenix.
Join Us Our Chat with Real Life Jay Kelly, Accountant With No Meaningful Connection to Movies, and Cares Less Why He's Often Mistaken for Joaquin Phoenix.
First Christmas Tree of 2025 Falls off Wagon
December 6, 2025 at 5:50 PM
First Christmas Tree of 2025 Falls off Wagon
Your Weekend Sherpa:
Netflix Drops 'Macron, Live!' Stand Up Comedy Special
Netflix Drops 'Macron, Live!' Stand Up Comedy Special
December 5, 2025 at 8:15 PM
Your Weekend Sherpa:
Netflix Drops 'Macron, Live!' Stand Up Comedy Special
Netflix Drops 'Macron, Live!' Stand Up Comedy Special
Sci-Fi Saga Thinly Veiled Metaphor for Disney's Intern Program
December 5, 2025 at 8:01 PM
Sci-Fi Saga Thinly Veiled Metaphor for Disney's Intern Program
Swan Insiders: We Chat With Jesse Plemons and Walk Though His Struggles to be Considered a "Normal Everyday Psycho"
December 4, 2025 at 6:35 PM
Swan Insiders: We Chat With Jesse Plemons and Walk Though His Struggles to be Considered a "Normal Everyday Psycho"
Weddings: Magician & Magic
Magician Fell for Magic While Dropping Out of Vanderbilt. Through Many Ups and Downs, On This Day, They're 4ever.
Magician Fell for Magic While Dropping Out of Vanderbilt. Through Many Ups and Downs, On This Day, They're 4ever.
December 4, 2025 at 3:17 PM
Weddings: Magician & Magic
Magician Fell for Magic While Dropping Out of Vanderbilt. Through Many Ups and Downs, On This Day, They're 4ever.
Magician Fell for Magic While Dropping Out of Vanderbilt. Through Many Ups and Downs, On This Day, They're 4ever.
Cool/Uncool: AI Professor Sends New Assistant to Teach Class
December 4, 2025 at 3:12 PM
Cool/Uncool: AI Professor Sends New Assistant to Teach Class
Steady Job Loss Holds Kids in Lull for Foreseeable Quarter
December 3, 2025 at 6:31 PM
Steady Job Loss Holds Kids in Lull for Foreseeable Quarter
Unemployed Woman Completes 'Stranger Things' Audiobook in One Sitting
December 2, 2025 at 5:10 PM
Unemployed Woman Completes 'Stranger Things' Audiobook in One Sitting
Real Estate: 'Breaking Bad' House
An original Vince Gilligan treatment for the next Emmy award winning series is hidden somewhere on the property. You will have time to find it, since there is bupkus to do in Albuquerque once the series wrapped.
An original Vince Gilligan treatment for the next Emmy award winning series is hidden somewhere on the property. You will have time to find it, since there is bupkus to do in Albuquerque once the series wrapped.
December 2, 2025 at 12:52 AM
Real Estate: 'Breaking Bad' House
An original Vince Gilligan treatment for the next Emmy award winning series is hidden somewhere on the property. You will have time to find it, since there is bupkus to do in Albuquerque once the series wrapped.
An original Vince Gilligan treatment for the next Emmy award winning series is hidden somewhere on the property. You will have time to find it, since there is bupkus to do in Albuquerque once the series wrapped.
Tesla Finally Cuts Ties With Primitive, Non Symmetrical Humanoid
December 1, 2025 at 11:24 PM
Tesla Finally Cuts Ties With Primitive, Non Symmetrical Humanoid
Spotlight: Cyber Monday Deal NY Jets Now 90% off
December 1, 2025 at 11:18 PM
Spotlight: Cyber Monday Deal NY Jets Now 90% off