@shitmyctosays.com
I’m a raging bucket of positivity
August 19, 2025 at 10:11 PM
I’m a raging bucket of positivity
I am at my asymptote for terror.
May 21, 2025 at 4:56 PM
I am at my asymptote for terror.
Me: They have all of the building blocks, but none of the glue. Putting them together is a shitshow.
CTO: Like putting a home depot sign on a forest.
CTO: Like putting a home depot sign on a forest.
May 12, 2025 at 1:34 PM
Me: They have all of the building blocks, but none of the glue. Putting them together is a shitshow.
CTO: Like putting a home depot sign on a forest.
CTO: Like putting a home depot sign on a forest.
Engineer: This is why we invented load balancers.
Engineer: The royal "we". I wasn't there.
CTO: I was..
Engineer: The royal "we". I wasn't there.
CTO: I was..
January 29, 2025 at 4:47 PM
Engineer: This is why we invented load balancers.
Engineer: The royal "we". I wasn't there.
CTO: I was..
Engineer: The royal "we". I wasn't there.
CTO: I was..
Murphy was an optimist
January 23, 2025 at 6:35 PM
Murphy was an optimist
Stability is not stasis
January 22, 2025 at 9:47 PM
Stability is not stasis
Safety is what happens when you don't pay attention. Security is what happens when somebody else pays attention.
December 16, 2024 at 9:17 PM
Safety is what happens when you don't pay attention. Security is what happens when somebody else pays attention.
Elevation is not escalation. Raise awareness in your leaders.
December 12, 2024 at 5:12 PM
Elevation is not escalation. Raise awareness in your leaders.
Culture change starts with incentives.
December 11, 2024 at 5:49 PM
Culture change starts with incentives.
Admin note:
Our CTO is on Bluesky!
Old posts have been imported but timestamps were lost.
"This is literally not what <thing> was designed for."
Our CTO is on Bluesky!
Old posts have been imported but timestamps were lost.
"This is literally not what <thing> was designed for."
December 6, 2024 at 12:37 AM
Admin note:
Our CTO is on Bluesky!
Old posts have been imported but timestamps were lost.
"This is literally not what <thing> was designed for."
Our CTO is on Bluesky!
Old posts have been imported but timestamps were lost.
"This is literally not what <thing> was designed for."
"Everybody wants to do the easy thing until production happens"
December 6, 2024 at 12:33 AM
"Everybody wants to do the easy thing until production happens"
I need the jello to be set enough to stand a fork in it.
December 6, 2024 at 12:33 AM
I need the jello to be set enough to stand a fork in it.
Murphy was an optimist.
December 6, 2024 at 12:32 AM
Murphy was an optimist.
Assuming something cannot happen is a great way to guarantee it WILL happen
December 6, 2024 at 12:32 AM
Assuming something cannot happen is a great way to guarantee it WILL happen
We designed a malware sideloader and charged you billions.
December 6, 2024 at 12:32 AM
We designed a malware sideloader and charged you billions.
CTO: You might be overthinking this.
Me: Overthinking things? Have you met us?
CTO: I have met you. That's why I made noises about overthinking.
Me: Overthinking things? Have you met us?
CTO: I have met you. That's why I made noises about overthinking.
December 6, 2024 at 12:32 AM
CTO: You might be overthinking this.
Me: Overthinking things? Have you met us?
CTO: I have met you. That's why I made noises about overthinking.
Me: Overthinking things? Have you met us?
CTO: I have met you. That's why I made noises about overthinking.
Systems that require perfect humans rarely have good outcomes
December 6, 2024 at 12:31 AM
Systems that require perfect humans rarely have good outcomes
This isn't the high-order bit you're looking for.
December 6, 2024 at 12:31 AM
This isn't the high-order bit you're looking for.
Making something simple is harder than making it complex.
This is the gold standard.
This is the gold standard.
December 6, 2024 at 12:31 AM
Making something simple is harder than making it complex.
This is the gold standard.
This is the gold standard.
This is a meta-stable death spiral.
December 6, 2024 at 12:30 AM
This is a meta-stable death spiral.
This is the existential crisis of our times.
December 6, 2024 at 12:29 AM
This is the existential crisis of our times.