I love to let peanut M&M's melt in my mouth. Sometimes I'll just be zoning out and I forget that I'm eating peanut M&M's and it'll melt and then there will just be a peanut in my mouth and I'll freak out a little bit cause I can't figure out where it came from.

I'm going to be very surprised if the next nominee is not on this list.

#mattgaetz #attorneygeneral

Do you think if a hurricane hit in the same spot, spinning the other way that everything would go back to normal?
#hurricanes #hope #science

Here's me being an idiot on stage. A lot of my comedy is like this. Some of it's even dumber #standupcomedy

I guess the last straw was like 30 straws ago............