you’re fired. wait you’re rehired. email us a list of things you’ve done today wait forget it you’re fired again. come back your job was important. you’re fired. or hired. come in to the office. wait the office has no computers go home. we are the department of government efficiency.

It is perfectly legal to know your rights and to educate others about them, too.

EVERYONE in the United States, citizen or not, has rights. I will not allow this administration to intimidate us from helping you know about them.

Here’s our shareable guide ⬇️: (pt. 1/2)

Wash those hands, folks. ‘Cause Polio’s probably coming back with all its other totally preventable viruses.

Not getting gas on my way home will forever be my downfall.

Jasmine Crockett: "The problem is that Americans thought it was okay to take a full fledged criminal and make him the President of the US and then they want to act aghast when he does criminal things. Let me tell you, we have a thug in charge of the US and if we don't wake up we may not have a US"

Everything’s awful but at least I’ve got this guy.

Brown sugar spice pop tarts!

This is Rocco. He's being praised a hero by his neighbors after his barking alerted them to an apartment fire that damaged 24 apartments last week. “They said they never hear him bark but he was barking out of control that something was wrong.” 14/10 good boy Rocco

I’m obsessed with my Boseph.

My pop tarts were extra flaky today.

I sorry but Girl Scout cookies suck. Will I still buy them because I’m a sucker for kids selling stuff? Yes.

I didn’t know this about him but I love it. I thought he was hilarious when I was a kid. R.I.P.

My best guy, Boseph.

Ugh. Why are people still hiring Wes to be on television? He’s been awful since he was on Real World. The women need to get these awful men out. Bob the Drag Queen can stay though. #traitors #whyarewehiringterriblemen

The New Republic is doing it right. Journalists take note

Pablo Esteban Evans, Esquire

Boseph