Ally
@pizzabitch.bsky.social
🖤 🥀Chaotic good, 🐝 agent of chaos, ❤️🔥 menace to society, 🍕 absolutely feral, and 🐦🔥 a threat to the new world order 🎱🔥💛
My 2026 resolutions/manifesto
December 18, 2025 at 7:01 PM
My 2026 resolutions/manifesto
Again, I definitely manifested way too close to the sun. I have never been with someone who actually wears me out. Like goddamn.
December 18, 2025 at 5:24 AM
Again, I definitely manifested way too close to the sun. I have never been with someone who actually wears me out. Like goddamn.
Ovulating again. I have noticed a fascinating change in behavior.
After my ex and I split, I got my energy back. For the past several months, without an appropriate place to put that energy, I would be fighty and in heat. I have found a place to put that energy and I’m much more grounded this round.
After my ex and I split, I got my energy back. For the past several months, without an appropriate place to put that energy, I would be fighty and in heat. I have found a place to put that energy and I’m much more grounded this round.
December 18, 2025 at 5:23 AM
Ovulating again. I have noticed a fascinating change in behavior.
After my ex and I split, I got my energy back. For the past several months, without an appropriate place to put that energy, I would be fighty and in heat. I have found a place to put that energy and I’m much more grounded this round.
After my ex and I split, I got my energy back. For the past several months, without an appropriate place to put that energy, I would be fighty and in heat. I have found a place to put that energy and I’m much more grounded this round.
I had a second person describe me as “playful, energetic, and adventurous”, and it called right back to those old texts…
I’ve been manifesting way WAY too close to the sun. It’s been a long time coming.
I’ve been manifesting way WAY too close to the sun. It’s been a long time coming.
December 10, 2025 at 8:22 AM
I had a second person describe me as “playful, energetic, and adventurous”, and it called right back to those old texts…
I’ve been manifesting way WAY too close to the sun. It’s been a long time coming.
I’ve been manifesting way WAY too close to the sun. It’s been a long time coming.
I manifested a little too close to the sun ☀️
December 8, 2025 at 4:40 AM
I manifested a little too close to the sun ☀️
Had a first from the boss today: “holy shit, you’re quick!”
December 7, 2025 at 5:42 AM
Had a first from the boss today: “holy shit, you’re quick!”
My mom keeps comparing me to her dead sister. I wish I had met her, she would’ve been my lesbian aunt and we would’ve been best friends.
November 27, 2025 at 8:32 PM
My mom keeps comparing me to her dead sister. I wish I had met her, she would’ve been my lesbian aunt and we would’ve been best friends.
I’ve decided that I’m going to become the coolest family member. Also the content creator. I can’t wait for the ex to get more secure in himself so we can file.
November 27, 2025 at 6:16 PM
I’ve decided that I’m going to become the coolest family member. Also the content creator. I can’t wait for the ex to get more secure in himself so we can file.
Guess what 😯❓it’s that time ⏰ of year 🗓 to gobble 🦃 gobble 🦃 gobble 🦃 up ⬆️ those dicks 🍆 chicks 🐥 and bicks 🤨 (big dicks) 🍆😫😫😫😫 I bet 😏 you’re all 😤😤😤 HORNY-copia 🌽 🥔🥕🌶🍆♋️👀👉👌 for SKANKS-giving
November 27, 2025 at 4:29 PM
Guess what 😯❓it’s that time ⏰ of year 🗓 to gobble 🦃 gobble 🦃 gobble 🦃 up ⬆️ those dicks 🍆 chicks 🐥 and bicks 🤨 (big dicks) 🍆😫😫😫😫 I bet 😏 you’re all 😤😤😤 HORNY-copia 🌽 🥔🥕🌶🍆♋️👀👉👌 for SKANKS-giving
Does anyone else send those viral copypastas of yester-internet? Especially around Thanksgiving?
November 27, 2025 at 4:28 PM
Does anyone else send those viral copypastas of yester-internet? Especially around Thanksgiving?
What I bring to the function:
Paper plates, boxed brownie mix, and weed. Lots of weed. #cousinwalk
Paper plates, boxed brownie mix, and weed. Lots of weed. #cousinwalk
November 27, 2025 at 4:25 PM
What I bring to the function:
Paper plates, boxed brownie mix, and weed. Lots of weed. #cousinwalk
Paper plates, boxed brownie mix, and weed. Lots of weed. #cousinwalk
My therapist told me to stop saying that I was going to off myself at every minor inconvenience. I’ve replaced it with “I’m gonna pew-pew this place.”
November 27, 2025 at 12:07 AM
My therapist told me to stop saying that I was going to off myself at every minor inconvenience. I’ve replaced it with “I’m gonna pew-pew this place.”
One of my coworkers tonight: “ally your bootie’s looking better and better each time I see it. You either must be doing your squats or riding a lot of cock and I know you like being ‘on top of things!’”
a cartoon of two men standing next to each other with the words `` both '' written on the bottom .
ALT: a cartoon of two men standing next to each other with the words `` both '' written on the bottom .
media.tenor.com
November 26, 2025 at 5:10 AM
One of my coworkers tonight: “ally your bootie’s looking better and better each time I see it. You either must be doing your squats or riding a lot of cock and I know you like being ‘on top of things!’”
How do women not know when they’re ovulating? I’m feral, rabid, insatiable. I want to tear a man limb from limb with my bare hands and eat his flesh. I’m in HEAT.
November 24, 2025 at 7:59 AM
How do women not know when they’re ovulating? I’m feral, rabid, insatiable. I want to tear a man limb from limb with my bare hands and eat his flesh. I’m in HEAT.
I’m not a slut, but I know I got game. I’m approaching 30, newly single, and have way less inhibitions than I did 6 years ago.
November 24, 2025 at 4:43 AM
I’m not a slut, but I know I got game. I’m approaching 30, newly single, and have way less inhibitions than I did 6 years ago.
🖤🥀entering my dark eclectic feminine era 🥀🖤
November 21, 2025 at 7:08 AM
🖤🥀entering my dark eclectic feminine era 🥀🖤
If Mr Sous chef couldn’t do that. That’s ok. His best friend and loyal right hand man has stepped up to the plate. Grungier, a bad influence, but sweeter. Brings me chocolate and flowers during my doubles… down to earth. Not compensating.
Don’t see a long term thing, but maybe the flash in my pan.
Don’t see a long term thing, but maybe the flash in my pan.
November 21, 2025 at 7:08 AM
If Mr Sous chef couldn’t do that. That’s ok. His best friend and loyal right hand man has stepped up to the plate. Grungier, a bad influence, but sweeter. Brings me chocolate and flowers during my doubles… down to earth. Not compensating.
Don’t see a long term thing, but maybe the flash in my pan.
Don’t see a long term thing, but maybe the flash in my pan.
After getting out of a long term, very committed relationship after being a serial monogamist since I was 16, I’ve been manifesting a “flash in the pan” for whomever comes next. A bad influence, slightly toxic, passionate, almost obsessive, and fueled by lust.
November 21, 2025 at 7:04 AM
After getting out of a long term, very committed relationship after being a serial monogamist since I was 16, I’ve been manifesting a “flash in the pan” for whomever comes next. A bad influence, slightly toxic, passionate, almost obsessive, and fueled by lust.
“It’s cute how I can fluster you.”
“Yeah, you do that a lot.”
“Good.”
🖤
“Yeah, you do that a lot.”
“Good.”
🖤
November 21, 2025 at 7:02 AM
“It’s cute how I can fluster you.”
“Yeah, you do that a lot.”
“Good.”
🖤
“Yeah, you do that a lot.”
“Good.”
🖤
So it could either be Bill Clinton, a horse, and now allegedly Arnold Palmer… and only Putin knows.
What is this timeline?
What is this timeline?
November 17, 2025 at 4:09 AM
So it could either be Bill Clinton, a horse, and now allegedly Arnold Palmer… and only Putin knows.
What is this timeline?
What is this timeline?
I’m starting to fall in love with driving stick shift. It was a learning curve… but now that it clicked, I don’t think I can go back to an automatic.
#focusST #pocketsizedracecar 🖤
#focusST #pocketsizedracecar 🖤
November 17, 2025 at 4:09 AM
I’m starting to fall in love with driving stick shift. It was a learning curve… but now that it clicked, I don’t think I can go back to an automatic.
#focusST #pocketsizedracecar 🖤
#focusST #pocketsizedracecar 🖤
I make friends the same way elementary schoolers do.
“Hi! We have the same car! Can we be friends?!”
“Hi! I love your outfit! Can we be friends?!”
“Your favorite color is yellow?! Mine too! Can we be friends?!”
“Hi! We have the same car! Can we be friends?!”
“Hi! I love your outfit! Can we be friends?!”
“Your favorite color is yellow?! Mine too! Can we be friends?!”
November 8, 2025 at 4:17 AM
I make friends the same way elementary schoolers do.
“Hi! We have the same car! Can we be friends?!”
“Hi! I love your outfit! Can we be friends?!”
“Your favorite color is yellow?! Mine too! Can we be friends?!”
“Hi! We have the same car! Can we be friends?!”
“Hi! I love your outfit! Can we be friends?!”
“Your favorite color is yellow?! Mine too! Can we be friends?!”
That’s fine. He couldn’t handle me anyways. The soft spot for him is gone and now I get to show him how I really treat men.
November 7, 2025 at 5:25 AM
That’s fine. He couldn’t handle me anyways. The soft spot for him is gone and now I get to show him how I really treat men.