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oddnewsnetwork.bsky.social
Odd News
@oddnewsnetwork.bsky.social
100 followers 14 following 220 posts
We combine the wit of top comedy writers and the talents of stand-up comedians to deliver a fresh take on news.

Not fake, not fiction, just reality caught wearing clown shoes. This is journalism’s funhouse mirror. This is Odd News.

https://oddnews.com
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And now he's really gotta go... to jail.

#anzzi #Arrest #Bidets #FloridaMan #smarttoilet #thefts #toilet #OddNews
Dumb Guy Caught in Smart Toilet Theft
And now he’s really gotta go… to jail.
oddnews.com
January 23, 2026 at 8:46 PM
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Often compared to, or referred to as a toilet, Staten Island is now the proud home of an award-winning bathroom... no, really!

#architecture #awards #bathrooms #newyork #nyc #statenisland #OddNews
I.M. Pee! Staten Island Bathroom Wins Architectural Award
Staten Island has won an award! New public bathroom is architectural innovation praised by American Institute of Architects.
oddnews.com
January 22, 2026 at 8:22 PM
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He didn't have cold feet when it came to breaking a zany world record.

#collection #GuinnessWorldRecord #news ##newsanchor #philadelphia #socks #OddNews
Philly News Anchor Is a Certified Sock Star
He didn’t have cold feet when it came to breaking a zany world record.
oddnews.com
January 22, 2026 at 8:20 PM
oddnewsnetwork.bsky.social
What began as parish hospitality ended somewhere between espionage and Etsy treason.

#military #nun #PutinVladimir #russia #sweden #ukraine #war #OddNews
Swedish Churches Discover “Nuns” Were Funding Putin’s War Machine One Tchotchke at a Time
Disclaimer: This article is based on actual news from the real world – honestly! However, it has been sprinkled with a healthy dose of satire. TÄBY, Sweden — The Church of Sweden has issued a formal…
oddnews.com
January 21, 2026 at 11:29 PM
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The guy had a heart of gold, which he’d also stolen.

#Arrest #bugsbunny #capecod #cocaine #dealer #thefts #OddNews
Would-Be Car Thief Calls Cops After Finding Drugs in Car
The guy had a heart of gold, which he’d also stolen.
oddnews.com
January 21, 2026 at 9:40 PM
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"She would have held."

#Arrest #canada #cars #ducttape #horses #police #speeding #OddNews
BC Man’s Duct Tape Acura Clocked at 130 km/h, Raising Questions About Physics, God
“She would have held.”…
oddnews.com
January 21, 2026 at 6:37 PM
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"Oxfam noted that 3.5 percent of EU billionaires' combined wealth, roughly €84 billion, would be sufficient to eradicate extreme poverty globally. Billionaire representatives responded that this figure failed to account for their strong preference for not doing that."

#economy #democracy #oddnews
Study Finds Countries With High Inequality Seven Times More Likely To Experience Democratic Backsliding
Billionaires assure everyone this is just correlation and not the thing they actually paid for.
oddnews.com
January 21, 2026 at 5:16 PM
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Federal health policy enters its “do whatever, just don’t be weird about it” era.

#alcohol #government #guidelines #Health #RobertFKennedyJr #OddNews
HHS Announces New Dietary Guidelines, Immediately Clarifies That Drinking Alone Still Counts as “Socializing”
Federal health policy enters its “do whatever, just don’t be weird about it” era.
oddnews.com
January 19, 2026 at 7:58 PM
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Russia responds by issuing muskets to horses.

#China #dog #military #robot #russians #OddNews
China Unveils Robot Dogs With Machine Guns, Motion-Controlled Combat Humanoids
Russia responds by issuing muskets to horses.
oddnews.com
January 19, 2026 at 7:47 PM
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The nightjar is a remarkable sight in Northern Ireland, and it was found behind an unremarkable garbage bin.

#belfast #birds #northernireland #rescue #wildlife #OddNews
Special Find: Rare Bird Found Behind Belfast Trash Can
The nightjar is a remarkable sight in Northern Ireland, and it was found behind an unremarkable garbage bin.
oddnews.com
January 19, 2026 at 6:01 PM
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An editorial shift designed to eliminate surprises, dissent, and AP style guides.

#FirstAmendment #military #newspaper #PENTAGON #StarsAndStripes #OddNews
Newspaper Stars and Stripes Will Shift Coverage From “What Is Happening” to “What We Say Is Happening”
An editorial shift designed to eliminate surprises, dissent, and AP style guides.
oddnews.com
January 19, 2026 at 5:29 PM
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Turns out the real apex predator was the sewer system.

#australia #beach #kaiju #poop #sydney #OddNews
Australia Announces Poor Environmental Policy Has Accidentally Created a Poo Kaiju
Turns out the real apex predator was the sewer system.
oddnews.com
January 19, 2026 at 5:26 PM
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Just keep livin' - unless you never were alive and are just an algorithm using Matt's likeness to sell stuff.

#alrightalrightalright #dazedandconfused #justkeeplivin #law #MatthewMcConaughey #trademark #OddNews
AI, AI, AI? Not After Matthew McConaughey Trademarked Phrases
Just keep livin’ – unless you never were alive and are just an algorithm using Matt’s likeness to sell stuff.
oddnews.com
January 16, 2026 at 8:22 PM
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It's official: This guy really blows.

#carelesswhisper #elvis #guinessworldrecord #portugal #saxophone #worldrecord #OddNews
Saxophone Player Sets World Record With 33 Hours of Sax Appeal
It’s official: This guy really blows.
oddnews.com
January 15, 2026 at 4:06 PM
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Standard protocol if the bin tips at 66 mph is to "tuck down inside and let the bin slide," which are words a grown man said out loud.

#guinessworldrecord #speed #trashcan #worldrecord #OddNews
Local Inventor Achieves Terminal Velocity in Garbage Receptacle, Calls It “Engineering”
Standard protocol if the bin tips at 66 mph is to “tuck down inside and let the bin slide,” which are words a grown man said out loud.
oddnews.com
January 14, 2026 at 5:44 PM
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Which explains why they all come back wanting to run for Senate.

#astronauts #brain #MRI #space #study #OddNews
Scientists Discover Astronauts’ Brains Drift After Months in Space
Which explains why they all come back wanting to run for Senate.
oddnews.com
January 14, 2026 at 5:42 PM
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We knew St. Louis had a lot of party animals, but this is getting out of hand.

#escape #goats #monkeys #stlouis. #vervet #OddNews
Goat Joins Rampaging Monkeys On Loose In St. Louis
We knew St. Louis had a lot of party animals, but this is getting out of hand.
oddnews.com
January 13, 2026 at 9:20 PM
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Three Gen Z entrepreneurs turn existential dread into a $1.15 subscription.

#app #China #death #morbid #OddNews
China’s Hottest App Would Like To Know if You’re Still Alive, No Pressure
Three Gen Z entrepreneurs turn existential dread into a $1.15 subscription.
oddnews.com
January 13, 2026 at 6:54 PM
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Has the American economy suffered so much that even crime doesn't pay anymore?

#burglary #Crime #criminal #economy #hardship #thief #OddNews
The American Economy’s Silent Victim: The Common Criminal
Has the American economy suffered so much that even crime doesn’t pay anymore?
oddnews.com
January 13, 2026 at 4:41 PM
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Announces that she will continue worshipping the ogre.

#buddha #dreamworks #Philippines #prayer #shrek #OddNews
Manila Woman Discovers Four Years of Daily Prayer Were Directed at 3D-Printed Shrek
Announces that she will continue worshipping the ogre.
oddnews.com
January 13, 2026 at 4:40 PM
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...deploying the same mathematical rigor that planned the Rams stadium deal.

#escape #monkeys #pet #stlouis #vervet #OddNews
St. Louis Officials Confirm “More Than One” Monkey Running Loose
deploying the same mathematical rigor that planned the Rams stadium deal.
oddnews.com
January 13, 2026 at 4:38 PM
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Your purchase will be significantly less potent than what you saw on TV.

#AMC #auction #bettercallsaul #BreakingBad #jessepinkman #Methamphetamine #walterwhite #OddNews
You Can Now Buy Walter White’s ‘Breaking Bad’ Meth
Your purchase will be significantly less potent than what you saw on TV.
oddnews.com
January 9, 2026 at 9:34 PM
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Yes, this is real.

#calvary #horse #military #Russia #Starlink #OddNews
Russia Unveils “Next-Generation” Horse-Powered Satellite Uplink
Yes, this is real.
oddnews.com
January 9, 2026 at 9:33 PM
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The new food pyramid: Built on protein, lobbyists, and vibes.

#conspiracy #dietplan #food #foodpyramid #PressRelease #RobertFKennedyJr #science #OddNews
RFK Jr. Unveils New Dietary Guidelines to Americans: Eat More Saturated Fats and Die Sooner
The new food pyramid: Built on protein, lobbyists, and vibes.
oddnews.com
January 8, 2026 at 9:19 PM
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The father of Western philosophy joins gender ideology on the list of things undergraduates cannot be trusted to encounter because it’s too sexy.

#FreeSpeech #philosophy #school #socrates #texasaandm #university #OddNews
Texas A&M Bans Plato From Philosophy Course Because He’s Too Sexy
The father of Western philosophy joins gender ideology on the list of things undergraduates cannot be trusted to encounter because it’s too sexy.
oddnews.com
January 8, 2026 at 5:04 PM