i’m researching bidets on my work computer and truly in what fetid boomer’s brain is that a bad thing? yes i am a person and i am waiting for an email. yes i poop. and what. are u going to fire me for using the money you pay me to buy a nicer bidet? good. do that. say it out loud. i dare you

Are the next 4 years really going to be logging on everyday to sentences like "a 19 year old doge intern called Big Balls has your social security number" because I'm already at capacity for this sort of thing

If you haven't already, today is a good day to go get your library card.

i fear it won't truly be home until horse_ebooks is here

in times like these, we really need to bring back both clove cigarettes and weird orphan literature for children