Shit Nonprofits Say
@nonprofitssay.bsky.social
Capturing the aesthetic beauty of nonprofit organizational expression. From the people who brought you the same on Twitter/X.
Our consultant is recommending more consultants.
October 25, 2025 at 12:38 AM
Our consultant is recommending more consultants.
Now we're at the part of the agenda where the vice presidents give shout-outs to each other.
September 11, 2025 at 10:37 PM
Now we're at the part of the agenda where the vice presidents give shout-outs to each other.
We remain committed to hiring the best people--and then undercutting them by bringing in consultants for the important stuff.
September 8, 2025 at 9:37 PM
We remain committed to hiring the best people--and then undercutting them by bringing in consultants for the important stuff.
I am pleased that you are all back to the office three days a week. Be advised that I will be cacooned in my office on calls with the door closed at all times, just as I was pre-pandemic. Nature is healing!
August 18, 2025 at 2:38 PM
I am pleased that you are all back to the office three days a week. Be advised that I will be cacooned in my office on calls with the door closed at all times, just as I was pre-pandemic. Nature is healing!
We will fight for our community and our beliefs.
Also, we don't feel it is appropriate right now to criticize the federal government during this grant funding cycle4.
Also, we don't feel it is appropriate right now to criticize the federal government during this grant funding cycle4.
July 21, 2025 at 6:04 PM
We will fight for our community and our beliefs.
Also, we don't feel it is appropriate right now to criticize the federal government during this grant funding cycle4.
Also, we don't feel it is appropriate right now to criticize the federal government during this grant funding cycle4.
With the end of the FY approaching, I think what staff really wants is an outdated proprietary budgeting system that is labyrinthine, counterintuitive, always crashing, and consistently wrong.
June 13, 2025 at 9:44 PM
With the end of the FY approaching, I think what staff really wants is an outdated proprietary budgeting system that is labyrinthine, counterintuitive, always crashing, and consistently wrong.
Our strategy is to be super strategic and lots of planning.
June 12, 2025 at 8:31 PM
Our strategy is to be super strategic and lots of planning.
Due to our policy of not sending fundraising appeals during times of national strife and anxiety, we have not sent any such appeals since February of last year.
June 11, 2025 at 10:29 PM
Due to our policy of not sending fundraising appeals during times of national strife and anxiety, we have not sent any such appeals since February of last year.
Org #1: Our fiscal year is July-June
Org #2: Our FY is April-March
Org #3: Our FY is Feb-Jan
Feds: Our FY is Oct-Sep
Org #2: Our FY is April-March
Org #3: Our FY is Feb-Jan
Feds: Our FY is Oct-Sep
June 10, 2025 at 10:01 PM
Org #1: Our fiscal year is July-June
Org #2: Our FY is April-March
Org #3: Our FY is Feb-Jan
Feds: Our FY is Oct-Sep
Org #2: Our FY is April-March
Org #3: Our FY is Feb-Jan
Feds: Our FY is Oct-Sep
Look, you folks are the experts on this subject matter, but my instinct tells me ...
May 21, 2025 at 2:57 PM
Look, you folks are the experts on this subject matter, but my instinct tells me ...
We have urgent, life-or-death issues to resolve in our meeting today, but first I want to complain about the vegan options for lunch.
May 15, 2025 at 11:44 PM
We have urgent, life-or-death issues to resolve in our meeting today, but first I want to complain about the vegan options for lunch.
#1: My commitment is to execute strategy according to our values paradigm in bold pursuit of metrics arrived at through an iterative process.
#2: All I asked is where you want to go for lunch.
#2: All I asked is where you want to go for lunch.
May 6, 2025 at 9:12 PM
#1: My commitment is to execute strategy according to our values paradigm in bold pursuit of metrics arrived at through an iterative process.
#2: All I asked is where you want to go for lunch.
#2: All I asked is where you want to go for lunch.
We are a science-based organization, but sometimes we are also a random-boardmember-idea-based organization.
April 9, 2025 at 5:24 PM
We are a science-based organization, but sometimes we are also a random-boardmember-idea-based organization.
As of now, we are no longer talking about the vision and leadership of the former CEO whose last day was Friday, and instead lauding the vision and leadership of the new CEO who starts Monday.
April 2, 2025 at 4:11 PM
As of now, we are no longer talking about the vision and leadership of the former CEO whose last day was Friday, and instead lauding the vision and leadership of the new CEO who starts Monday.
Just a quick note that the ED has a few suggested edits to your note on Sally's digital good-bye card.
March 26, 2025 at 7:41 PM
Just a quick note that the ED has a few suggested edits to your note on Sally's digital good-bye card.
I feel less bad now about not muting myself before flushing the toilet while on that Zoom call.
March 25, 2025 at 9:13 PM
I feel less bad now about not muting myself before flushing the toilet while on that Zoom call.
All of our member polling tells us to do this one thing, but one of our donors wants us to do this other thing so we're going to do that.
March 10, 2025 at 5:10 PM
All of our member polling tells us to do this one thing, but one of our donors wants us to do this other thing so we're going to do that.
Before I get started on this thing that everyone wants to do, I am going to spend a lot of time finding someone to tell us not to.
March 7, 2025 at 7:33 PM
Before I get started on this thing that everyone wants to do, I am going to spend a lot of time finding someone to tell us not to.
The company we've hired to redesign our website doesn't have a website.
March 6, 2025 at 11:26 PM
The company we've hired to redesign our website doesn't have a website.
We acknowledge that this administration is working to destroy any and all progress we've made on the issues that are most important to us, but we nonetheless are committed to working with them in good faith.
February 27, 2025 at 8:41 PM
We acknowledge that this administration is working to destroy any and all progress we've made on the issues that are most important to us, but we nonetheless are committed to working with them in good faith.
Remember when they gave you free cheese pizza when you came into the office?
February 27, 2025 at 12:13 AM
Remember when they gave you free cheese pizza when you came into the office?
We're all fundraisers!
February 25, 2025 at 12:38 AM
We're all fundraisers!
We will only fund you if you can demonstrate that you don't need the money. And if you don't need the funding, then we should probably put that money somewhere it will do more good.
February 18, 2025 at 11:39 PM
We will only fund you if you can demonstrate that you don't need the money. And if you don't need the funding, then we should probably put that money somewhere it will do more good.
That's an output, not an outcome.
February 13, 2025 at 10:54 PM
That's an output, not an outcome.
The Frequently Asked Questions in our FAQ have never been asked by anyone.
February 11, 2025 at 7:30 PM
The Frequently Asked Questions in our FAQ have never been asked by anyone.