Nicole
@nicolemons.bsky.social
Sometimes we do things just because we're family.
Ok. This is correct. Mmhmm. Yes.
Ok I made the bestest, most correct regional map of the US. Fight me.
December 4, 2025 at 11:28 PM
Ok. This is correct. Mmhmm. Yes.
Teaching: a profession in which you eat ice cream from the FACS class at 9:30 am and get interrupted by a kid telling you they got a full ride to Princeton and also still have 22 essays to grade by 2:30 because yesterday was a snow day.
December 3, 2025 at 4:05 PM
Teaching: a profession in which you eat ice cream from the FACS class at 9:30 am and get interrupted by a kid telling you they got a full ride to Princeton and also still have 22 essays to grade by 2:30 because yesterday was a snow day.
Hear me out: Black Friday deal on the property taxes I paid yesterday. BOGO car taxes or something.
November 29, 2025 at 2:16 PM
Hear me out: Black Friday deal on the property taxes I paid yesterday. BOGO car taxes or something.
Today the ATM took 400 of my dollars, said it was returning the cash because it couldn't accept more cash, didn't do that, then I got a receipt wherein the robot basically said "Oopsies. Money gone. 🤷🏼♀️"
How's your Saturday?
How's your Saturday?
November 22, 2025 at 10:17 PM
Today the ATM took 400 of my dollars, said it was returning the cash because it couldn't accept more cash, didn't do that, then I got a receipt wherein the robot basically said "Oopsies. Money gone. 🤷🏼♀️"
How's your Saturday?
How's your Saturday?
There is not a single interaction with a former student that I don't live for--grocery store run-ins, grad parties, waiting for the same flight, as my bank teller, whatever--with ONE MAJOR exception: if I ever graded your essays, it should be illegal for you to swipe right on my dating profile.
November 15, 2025 at 6:41 PM
There is not a single interaction with a former student that I don't live for--grocery store run-ins, grad parties, waiting for the same flight, as my bank teller, whatever--with ONE MAJOR exception: if I ever graded your essays, it should be illegal for you to swipe right on my dating profile.
There is not a single reason on the planet not to like gnocchi and yet every time I don't.
November 4, 2025 at 1:00 AM
There is not a single reason on the planet not to like gnocchi and yet every time I don't.
Teacher hack to love your job: teach kids, wait like 8 years, get invitation to their wedding, attend said wedding, have the absolute best time with the 20-something versions of them and their friends who are the kids you knew as juniors. Repeat every few years to sustain you until retirement.
October 27, 2025 at 1:34 PM
Teacher hack to love your job: teach kids, wait like 8 years, get invitation to their wedding, attend said wedding, have the absolute best time with the 20-something versions of them and their friends who are the kids you knew as juniors. Repeat every few years to sustain you until retirement.
Trying to explain the Dunkin spidey socials takeover to my high school aged son is a wild time.
E: But, like, why does he spell stuff like that?
Me: He's a spider! He's chaos!
E: Mom. It's not a real spider.
Me: You're right. He's a donut! They can't spell either!
E: 😒
E: But, like, why does he spell stuff like that?
Me: He's a spider! He's chaos!
E: Mom. It's not a real spider.
Me: You're right. He's a donut! They can't spell either!
E: 😒
October 15, 2025 at 1:17 PM
Trying to explain the Dunkin spidey socials takeover to my high school aged son is a wild time.
E: But, like, why does he spell stuff like that?
Me: He's a spider! He's chaos!
E: Mom. It's not a real spider.
Me: You're right. He's a donut! They can't spell either!
E: 😒
E: But, like, why does he spell stuff like that?
Me: He's a spider! He's chaos!
E: Mom. It's not a real spider.
Me: You're right. He's a donut! They can't spell either!
E: 😒
I've worked at this school 14 yrs. We're now getting horrible hateful phone calls because this is hitting the FB circuit.
EXCEPT ZACH GRADUATED IN 2021 & THIS WAS NEWS 4 YEARS AGO SHUT UUUUPPPPP.
& he has 2.3 mil followers on TT & makes so much money being himself in this way. & it's a student vote!
EXCEPT ZACH GRADUATED IN 2021 & THIS WAS NEWS 4 YEARS AGO SHUT UUUUPPPPP.
& he has 2.3 mil followers on TT & makes so much money being himself in this way. & it's a student vote!
October 8, 2025 at 11:48 PM
I've worked at this school 14 yrs. We're now getting horrible hateful phone calls because this is hitting the FB circuit.
EXCEPT ZACH GRADUATED IN 2021 & THIS WAS NEWS 4 YEARS AGO SHUT UUUUPPPPP.
& he has 2.3 mil followers on TT & makes so much money being himself in this way. & it's a student vote!
EXCEPT ZACH GRADUATED IN 2021 & THIS WAS NEWS 4 YEARS AGO SHUT UUUUPPPPP.
& he has 2.3 mil followers on TT & makes so much money being himself in this way. & it's a student vote!
My dad, now a retired general who would've been in Pete's meeting were it a few years earlier, who scrambled 3 am honor guards at Dover in the 90s, who fled his Pentagon office on 9/11 got called a liberal last week. His liberal crime? Opposition to Kirk's casket being flown on AF2.
We're cooked.
We're cooked.
October 2, 2025 at 1:13 AM
My dad, now a retired general who would've been in Pete's meeting were it a few years earlier, who scrambled 3 am honor guards at Dover in the 90s, who fled his Pentagon office on 9/11 got called a liberal last week. His liberal crime? Opposition to Kirk's casket being flown on AF2.
We're cooked.
We're cooked.
SEC vs. the world. It just means more.
October 1, 2025 at 10:03 PM
SEC vs. the world. It just means more.
"Hey Jules. It's Brian" makes my heart stop every. single. time.
Two people I don't know and his first four words of that voicemail rip my guts out annually.
Two people I don't know and his first four words of that voicemail rip my guts out annually.
September 11, 2025 at 1:05 PM
"Hey Jules. It's Brian" makes my heart stop every. single. time.
Two people I don't know and his first four words of that voicemail rip my guts out annually.
Two people I don't know and his first four words of that voicemail rip my guts out annually.
Listen, I'm on board with the idea of schools who don't charge students to attend in exchange for a reasonable amount of work on campus. But College of the Ozarks, you're wild for this one.
September 10, 2025 at 11:25 PM
Listen, I'm on board with the idea of schools who don't charge students to attend in exchange for a reasonable amount of work on campus. But College of the Ozarks, you're wild for this one.
My desire to not sit on a jury for a multi-day case about DV and have to make sub plans for that is in direct conflict with my need to chosen for a jury because that means they think I'm the best citizen.
September 9, 2025 at 7:47 PM
My desire to not sit on a jury for a multi-day case about DV and have to make sub plans for that is in direct conflict with my need to chosen for a jury because that means they think I'm the best citizen.
"I have a notes app list on my phone of all the reasons capitalism is bad."
-my totally normal 15 year old talking about totally normal 15 year old stuff
-my totally normal 15 year old talking about totally normal 15 year old stuff
September 4, 2025 at 4:24 AM
"I have a notes app list on my phone of all the reasons capitalism is bad."
-my totally normal 15 year old talking about totally normal 15 year old stuff
-my totally normal 15 year old talking about totally normal 15 year old stuff
When people get pissed about Missouri Dems not staging a Texas-style walkout when our state map gets more gerrymandered, know that we are so screwed already that even if every Dem left, the Rep supermajority would still have quorum & it wouldn't even slow the process.
& that's on identity politics.
& that's on identity politics.
September 2, 2025 at 1:52 PM
When people get pissed about Missouri Dems not staging a Texas-style walkout when our state map gets more gerrymandered, know that we are so screwed already that even if every Dem left, the Rep supermajority would still have quorum & it wouldn't even slow the process.
& that's on identity politics.
& that's on identity politics.
Reposted by Nicole
FUCK AI. Stop using it. It’s making you dumb, making the billionaires richer, and destroying the creative soul of humanity AND the planet.
August 11, 2025 at 11:36 PM
FUCK AI. Stop using it. It’s making you dumb, making the billionaires richer, and destroying the creative soul of humanity AND the planet.
A hell hole. Look at how busy and scary that metro station is. And we had to walk one whole well maintained, safe, clean block from that GW arch to find an iced coffee!
August 12, 2025 at 12:51 AM
A hell hole. Look at how busy and scary that metro station is. And we had to walk one whole well maintained, safe, clean block from that GW arch to find an iced coffee!
Two things I love the most: gymnastics and The Great Gatsby. And somehow GAGE and their leo tonight has managed to combine them in a way so horrible I want to give up both.
August 9, 2025 at 1:48 AM
Two things I love the most: gymnastics and The Great Gatsby. And somehow GAGE and their leo tonight has managed to combine them in a way so horrible I want to give up both.
Me checking out my class rosters every August
August 7, 2025 at 10:01 PM
Me checking out my class rosters every August
Look, my baseball team may suck right now but, for the love of all that is hood in the world, leave them out of the double dongs headline.
Dodgers 12, Cardinals 6: Bats finally explode for 17 hits behind dual double dongs from Muncy & Teoscar - By: Chad Moriyama
dodgersdigest.com/2025/08/05/d...
dodgersdigest.com/2025/08/05/d...
Dodgers 12, Cardinals 6: Bats finally explode for 17 hits behind dual double dongs from Muncy & Teoscar - Dodgers Digest
After yesterday's frustrating affair, the Dodgers thankfully finally took that out on the opposition
dodgersdigest.com
August 7, 2025 at 2:19 AM
Look, my baseball team may suck right now but, for the love of all that is hood in the world, leave them out of the double dongs headline.
My emotional support animal is a rotisserie chicken.
August 1, 2025 at 6:01 PM
My emotional support animal is a rotisserie chicken.
Declaring this my Instagram Summer: only documenting the amazing trips & never speaking of the human surgery, dog surgery, wasp nests everywhere, ER visits and the leaky tub. Kthanks.
July 27, 2025 at 6:59 PM
Declaring this my Instagram Summer: only documenting the amazing trips & never speaking of the human surgery, dog surgery, wasp nests everywhere, ER visits and the leaky tub. Kthanks.
Look, I know the summer newscasters in my college town are undergrads and I get that they're learning, but if you mispronounce Uvalde, Belarus AND Bogota all in the same broadcast, maybe you're not ready for live tv yet.
July 19, 2025 at 11:12 PM
Look, I know the summer newscasters in my college town are undergrads and I get that they're learning, but if you mispronounce Uvalde, Belarus AND Bogota all in the same broadcast, maybe you're not ready for live tv yet.
Not to be dramatic, but my weighted vest will fix me.
July 19, 2025 at 1:50 AM
Not to be dramatic, but my weighted vest will fix me.