Nick Barlow
@nickbwalking.bsky.social
Writer, walker, Who and Wolves fan. Lives in Whitehaven. Lots of other things that don't begin with W. https://linktr.ee/nickbarlow He/him
Avatar: Me (50ish man with greying hair and beard) smiling at the camera.
Avatar: Me (50ish man with greying hair and beard) smiling at the camera.
Reposted by Nick Barlow
"A few weeks ago I was having a major personal crisis so, as usual, I asked my microwave for advice! Anyway now I will report the tech news to you!"
January 3, 2026 at 4:23 AM
"A few weeks ago I was having a major personal crisis so, as usual, I asked my microwave for advice! Anyway now I will report the tech news to you!"
Last night I was reading about how ChatGPT encouraged a man to kill his mother, this morning I'm seeing that Grok generates CSAM. Please, tell me more about why "AI" is indispensable and we must include it in everything.
January 2, 2026 at 8:54 AM
Last night I was reading about how ChatGPT encouraged a man to kill his mother, this morning I'm seeing that Grok generates CSAM. Please, tell me more about why "AI" is indispensable and we must include it in everything.
"I'd like to order 100 coffins, please. Oh, and make sure they float."
"That sounds a little suspicious, not sure if we can do that."
"It's for The Traitors."
"Oh, that's fine. Do you need some headstones too?"
#TheTraitors
"That sounds a little suspicious, not sure if we can do that."
"It's for The Traitors."
"Oh, that's fine. Do you need some headstones too?"
#TheTraitors
January 1, 2026 at 8:45 PM
"I'd like to order 100 coffins, please. Oh, and make sure they float."
"That sounds a little suspicious, not sure if we can do that."
"It's for The Traitors."
"Oh, that's fine. Do you need some headstones too?"
#TheTraitors
"That sounds a little suspicious, not sure if we can do that."
"It's for The Traitors."
"Oh, that's fine. Do you need some headstones too?"
#TheTraitors
James looks like David Tennant and Amanda has a Kate Stewart vibe, so I'm going to be spending far too much time working out which Doctor Who character everyone on #TheTraitors resembles.
January 1, 2026 at 8:33 PM
James looks like David Tennant and Amanda has a Kate Stewart vibe, so I'm going to be spending far too much time working out which Doctor Who character everyone on #TheTraitors resembles.
One year, I want them to do a twist where Claudia selects no Traitors, producers randomly choose one player to murder each night and the game continues until they work it out. #TheTraitors
January 1, 2026 at 8:23 PM
One year, I want them to do a twist where Claudia selects no Traitors, producers randomly choose one player to murder each night and the game continues until they work it out. #TheTraitors
"Can't remember names, can't spell names." Wow, perfect casting for #TheTraitors
January 1, 2026 at 8:18 PM
"Can't remember names, can't spell names." Wow, perfect casting for #TheTraitors
Hugo's not making it past the first day. If the Traitors don't murder him, he's first to be voted out. #TheTraitors
January 1, 2026 at 8:10 PM
Hugo's not making it past the first day. If the Traitors don't murder him, he's first to be voted out. #TheTraitors
I want the guy from the Isle of Lewis to have kept some of their traditions and refuse to murder on a Sunday. #TheTraitors
January 1, 2026 at 8:06 PM
I want the guy from the Isle of Lewis to have kept some of their traditions and refuse to murder on a Sunday. #TheTraitors
Reposted by Nick Barlow
One year since I posted this. One year since everybody treated it like a joke. One year of watching my back. Tell me: have you seen much of Harry Styles this past year? Tim Davie's gone a bit quiet too, hasn't he?
![A comic for the Guardian by Stephen Collins on New Years Eve 2024. Script as follows:
1
THE SCENE: is BBC Television centre or wherever that is these days. HARRY STYLES is getting out of a limo to enter a studio. An autograph-hunting FAN accosts him.
Also, a DATE STAMP appears ‘on screen’, like it used to do in the X-files, reading:
OCTOBER, 2024: Maidstone Studios, England
FAN 1:
That’s Harry Styles!
FAN 2 [Approaching Harry]:
Can I have a selfie, Harry?
2
FAN:
What are you doing at Maidstone Studios on this finbe day in mid October, Harry?
3
HARRY STYLES:
Why, I’ve come here in mid-October to record ‘Jools Holland’s New Year Hoote-‘
4
*FSHW*
[Harry Styles is suddenly vaporised by a LASER BEAM]
5
[We see the culprit; a hi tech flying DRONE has zapped Mr Styles to death. The drone has a camera eye on the front of it]
6
[Cut to: JOOLS HOLLAND in his Hootenanny lair, watching a screen which has just alerted him to the elimination of Styles]
[Legend on screen]:
ARTIST ELIMINATED
HOLLAND:
Goddamn it
7
HOLLAND:
Why can’t they keep their mouths SHUT?
8
HOLLAND:
Tim Davie!
TIM DAVIE [Director General of the BBC]:
Y-yes Jools?
HOLLAND:
Who’ve we got left for this year?
10
TIM DAVIE:
The Boomtown Rats, one of Sister Sledge and Marc Almond
HOLLAND:
Almond *again*?
11
TIM DAVIE:
We’re running out of artists to call, sir…
M-must we keep killing… so many…?
HOLLAND:
You know the rules, Davie. The secret of the Hootenanny must be protected at all costs. All who divulge it…
12
HOLLAND [close up on his evil face, eye twitching]:
Must be eliminated](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4m3we4apbjayclzcnhwe3pfp/bafkreiafp3a2py3i5qz3lw3bwk3zrjnjnwxmm72tonf47xx67ilulotrtu@jpeg)
December 31, 2025 at 2:09 PM
One year since I posted this. One year since everybody treated it like a joke. One year of watching my back. Tell me: have you seen much of Harry Styles this past year? Tim Davie's gone a bit quiet too, hasn't he?
Entering the new year.
January 1, 2026 at 7:25 AM
Entering the new year.
Too busy with one of this year's achievements (writing an essay for the masters) to write a proper look back on 2025, but pretty proud of managing to hit 5 million steps in a year today. See if you can spot which month I got Dougal in.
December 31, 2025 at 8:55 PM
Too busy with one of this year's achievements (writing an essay for the masters) to write a proper look back on 2025, but pretty proud of managing to hit 5 million steps in a year today. See if you can spot which month I got Dougal in.
New Year's Resolution: pitch "was Leni Riefenstahl woke?" to the Telegraph.
December 31, 2025 at 8:17 PM
New Year's Resolution: pitch "was Leni Riefenstahl woke?" to the Telegraph.
Should have kept stats to government Dougal a 2025 In Review: walks, poos picked up, muddy puddles jumped in, other dogs met: and percentage successfully sniffed or just barked at.
But here's a picture of him with one of several sticks too big for him he discovered this year.
But here's a picture of him with one of several sticks too big for him he discovered this year.
December 31, 2025 at 8:15 PM
Should have kept stats to government Dougal a 2025 In Review: walks, poos picked up, muddy puddles jumped in, other dogs met: and percentage successfully sniffed or just barked at.
But here's a picture of him with one of several sticks too big for him he discovered this year.
But here's a picture of him with one of several sticks too big for him he discovered this year.
I grew up with enough disaster movies on TV around this time of year to know something bad is about to happen.
December 31, 2025 at 8:01 PM
I grew up with enough disaster movies on TV around this time of year to know something bad is about to happen.
Ten years on and Lexiters still refuse to notice the flaw in their grand plan was expecting a Tory government to deliver it.
Lexit lives! morningstaronline.co.uk/article/labo...
Labour must not reverse Brexit
A DANGEROUS tendency is emerging in the labour movement to reopen the Brexit question. Several government figures have started to criticise the impact on the economy of Britain leaving the Europe...
morningstaronline.co.uk
December 31, 2025 at 8:37 AM
Ten years on and Lexiters still refuse to notice the flaw in their grand plan was expecting a Tory government to deliver it.
Me, approaching the end of 2025.
December 30, 2025 at 10:13 PM
Me, approaching the end of 2025.
There are two British actors in lead roles in The Wire. One went to Eton and has played the King on screen, the other has a knighthood.
December 30, 2025 at 8:17 AM
There are two British actors in lead roles in The Wire. One went to Eton and has played the King on screen, the other has a knighthood.
Reposted by Nick Barlow
Who Do You Support? Half'n'Half scarves, part of an art installation by Wankers of the World.
December 29, 2025 at 6:46 PM
Who Do You Support? Half'n'Half scarves, part of an art installation by Wankers of the World.
Dune 3: A Knives Out Mystery
December 29, 2025 at 2:28 PM
Dune 3: A Knives Out Mystery
Reposted by Nick Barlow
Just watched the new Knives Out and I think it's really important you know that the scene in the Seminary's Gym is filmed in the same place Rick Astley filmed the music video for Never Gonna Give You Up.
I saw the window tracery and immediately made my friends pause the film so I could tell them.
I saw the window tracery and immediately made my friends pause the film so I could tell them.
December 29, 2025 at 1:11 PM
Just watched the new Knives Out and I think it's really important you know that the scene in the Seminary's Gym is filmed in the same place Rick Astley filmed the music video for Never Gonna Give You Up.
I saw the window tracery and immediately made my friends pause the film so I could tell them.
I saw the window tracery and immediately made my friends pause the film so I could tell them.
I was just going to use a woman's name for my childcare startup, but thought I should add a term for family in there as well to show how protective we are of your children. So, who wants to invest in Anakin?
Palantir. Sauron. CyberDyne. Blackrock. Mr Beast Inc. Cerberus. Blackwater. Anduril. Citizen. Citadel. Gilead. Bain Capital. Darktrace. Oracle. Umbra.
December 29, 2025 at 9:22 AM
I was just going to use a woman's name for my childcare startup, but thought I should add a term for family in there as well to show how protective we are of your children. So, who wants to invest in Anakin?
Reposted by Nick Barlow
RIP Claudia Cardinale. Much like Robert Redford, she was a rare case of a beautiful performer with a filmography full of bangers who did NOT become right-wing later in life. Here she is punching fascist Brigitte Bardot in the face in Les Pétroleuses (1971).
September 24, 2025 at 2:51 PM
RIP Claudia Cardinale. Much like Robert Redford, she was a rare case of a beautiful performer with a filmography full of bangers who did NOT become right-wing later in life. Here she is punching fascist Brigitte Bardot in the face in Les Pétroleuses (1971).
What’s everyone’s favorite Avatar quote?
Got to be Shatner screaming "Avvvvvaaaaatttttaaaarrrrr!"
Got to be Shatner screaming "Avvvvvaaaaatttttaaaarrrrr!"
What’s everyone’s favorite Avatar quote?
I just like the one about cabbages.
I just like the one about cabbages.
What’s everyone’s favorite Avatar quote?
Mine is: “Mein Avatar, I can valk!"
Mine is: “Mein Avatar, I can valk!"
December 28, 2025 at 5:26 PM
What’s everyone’s favorite Avatar quote?
Got to be Shatner screaming "Avvvvvaaaaatttttaaaarrrrr!"
Got to be Shatner screaming "Avvvvvaaaaatttttaaaarrrrr!"
To make it hard, no Pulp or Manics:
December 28, 2025 at 8:23 AM
To make it hard, no Pulp or Manics: