Mj He/Him
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mjbaines.bsky.social
Mj He/Him
@mjbaines.bsky.social
👋 ✌️ 🏳️‍🌈 📚 🧙‍♂️ 🥑 🐱

Writer. Reader. Dungeon Master.

WIP = Pych Haunting Historic Gay Thing?
I just spent far too long trying to find an electric dustpan and brush.
November 5, 2025 at 11:26 AM
I hope you are spooked or cuddled as your Halloween desires!
October 31, 2025 at 9:02 PM
When I was 16 I would’ve tried to write a really deep metaphor about life and how when you achieve something great it all comes tumbling out…

Instead, I’m gunna say that f*ing hate the moment when you’ve spent 20 mins pumping up an airbed and then let it all out when you try and shove the cork in.
October 28, 2025 at 5:27 PM
Reposted by Mj He/Him
Are you a UK or Ireland-based designer looking to get started in the industry? Penguin UK has launched its cover design awards and this year, the focus is fantasy – and one of the two titles is Terry Pratchett's Night Watch. More details:
terrypratchett.com/news/calling...
Calling all designers! Create your own version of a classic Discworld cover... | Terry Pratchett
Penguin UK has launched its annual cover design award contest where all UK and Ireland-based designers can submit their own designs for two classic Penguin titles. This year’s focus is fantasy and the...
terrypratchett.com
October 23, 2025 at 9:09 AM
In advance of London pride and due to a desire to procrastinate from work, I’ve done my nails with a weird multi colored confetti like varnish…

And my god I hate it!! So bumpy. Randomly falling off. And stinks so bad my cats won’t even be in the same room as me!
July 3, 2025 at 5:26 PM
Time for a weekend recharge! 💤😻
June 28, 2025 at 3:11 PM
How do any Dungeon Masters manage to write any novels or anything while working on a campaign?? It’s endless!

Currently having to research lots for a tomb raider sequence. And it’s very distracting having to play Lara Croft
June 20, 2025 at 6:48 PM
Kiki helping to wrap a present 🥰😂
June 20, 2025 at 6:42 PM
I regret calling every pet I’ve watched on TikTok dragging their poopy arse across the carpet cute.

… it is not cute. It is a horror show.
June 5, 2025 at 8:03 AM
March 20, 2025 at 11:04 PM
I’m currently using a hairdryer on a stone I painted white. And my cat is looking at me with a ferocity of judgement that’s making my skin prickle.
February 9, 2025 at 9:47 PM
When football fans and nerds cross paths.
February 8, 2025 at 12:46 PM
Mr dignified
February 5, 2025 at 10:24 AM
My DM house-rule is that if it’s gone 10 days since the last session, then I add +1 DC to the first check of the next session for each player for every additional day they haven’t organized the time for our next game.

(And no, I haven’t told them this.)
January 28, 2025 at 11:55 AM
I spend ages each morning doing beautiful coffee art. With foam and swirls and maybe even a sunset landscape.

Yet by the time I reach the end of the frankly tiny hallway and reach my bf, it’s always an over spilling hot steaming mug of shite.
January 24, 2025 at 9:45 AM
There is a lot wrong with the world right now.

However. I have been slow roasting a pair of baby cauliflowers for 4 hours. Having massaged garlic butter into them with my own two hands. And soon I’ll eat them with my boyfriend for dinner.

So I can briefly be content.
January 23, 2025 at 7:14 PM
Forgot I was wearing a paper party hat, and only realized while showering when the disgustingly soggy clump fell off my head, slipped down my chest and splashed onto the floor. 🤢😂
January 18, 2025 at 12:08 PM
Pop into X: see disinformation (lies) about PrEP, and usual terf shizzle.

Return here: see someone’s D&D art and a thread about new indie authors to follow.

🦋🥰
January 12, 2025 at 9:50 AM
How many ‘don’t ask’ things do you allow your partner a week?? I know it’s Friday. But I feel he’s just had 10th of the week!

This time, an 8:30 delivery of bleach after he’s been in the bathroom a while.
January 10, 2025 at 8:40 AM
Just run my first D&D campaign of the year.

I was setting up a story around wild magic and nature’s corruption. They’ve somehow already turned it into a capitalist adventure where they have a monopoly on sea shell trade.

My homework after the session is writing an exclusivity contract. 🙈😅
January 1, 2025 at 10:29 PM
After two years of sleeping on the cheapest mattress off Amazon after moving into the flat and waking up every morning aching, we got ourselves a mattress topper. And fuck me. I may never leave the bed again. As for sex? Screw that. This baby is far too precious and wholesome. The floor will do.
December 30, 2024 at 10:50 PM
One of the great privileges of humanity is the ability to make ‘once in a lifetime mistakes’ multiple times.
December 29, 2024 at 2:33 PM
The world framed and centered through a blurring motorway fence for hours on end is a dreary thing. And yet, somehow, full of hope.
December 28, 2024 at 3:34 PM
Christmas cat 🥰🥰
December 23, 2024 at 2:18 PM
I’m in a house with 4 cats for Christmas. 2 shut in with me in my own room with bf.

There’s also sea nearby. And I’m always being offered coffee and freshly made cake.

I may actually like Christmas again!!
December 22, 2024 at 5:48 PM