McDad
@mcdadstuff.bsky.social
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McDad
@mcdadstuff.bsky.social
· Nov 21
One of my air pods is at 79% and the other is at 13%. How is this possible? Is one ear using more power than the other? Seems a little… ear-y
Last night, I dreamt I owned an older female horse. It was a night mare
April 23, 2025 at 9:55 PM
Last night, I dreamt I owned an older female horse. It was a night mare
My teen daughter, realizing she’s going to be 20 in 3 years:
That’s like a real person, eww!
That’s like a real person, eww!
March 6, 2025 at 1:17 PM
My teen daughter, realizing she’s going to be 20 in 3 years:
That’s like a real person, eww!
That’s like a real person, eww!
Today is Wednesday, or as we refer to it in adulting, Trash Day Eve
March 5, 2025 at 7:53 PM
Today is Wednesday, or as we refer to it in adulting, Trash Day Eve
I’d like to submit for a transfer over to one of the other simulations
February 27, 2025 at 10:54 PM
I’d like to submit for a transfer over to one of the other simulations
I was at a concert till 11pm last night. I’m gonna need coffee, cucumbers over my eyelids, a heating pad, a neck and head massage and someone to tell me everything’s gonna be ok
February 25, 2025 at 4:43 PM
I was at a concert till 11pm last night. I’m gonna need coffee, cucumbers over my eyelids, a heating pad, a neck and head massage and someone to tell me everything’s gonna be ok
If you sneeze 3 times in a row, a dad shows up to say well done (and hand you a tissue)
February 24, 2025 at 12:39 PM
If you sneeze 3 times in a row, a dad shows up to say well done (and hand you a tissue)
Roses are red, violets are blue. The dirty dishes are still in the sink waiting for you
February 15, 2025 at 1:56 PM
Roses are red, violets are blue. The dirty dishes are still in the sink waiting for you
If she doesn’t leave you roses by the stairs, does she even care?
February 13, 2025 at 6:10 PM
If she doesn’t leave you roses by the stairs, does she even care?
I haven’t ordered anything from Amazon in a while. I wonder if I’m coming down with something
February 13, 2025 at 1:02 PM
I haven’t ordered anything from Amazon in a while. I wonder if I’m coming down with something
Wife: Why are you in here making obnoxious jokes about chicken?
Me: I’m roasting the chicken
Me: I’m roasting the chicken
February 13, 2025 at 12:19 AM
Wife: Why are you in here making obnoxious jokes about chicken?
Me: I’m roasting the chicken
Me: I’m roasting the chicken
Got fired from my job as a tour guide at the dynamite factory for saying the tour was gonna be lit
February 12, 2025 at 12:57 PM
Got fired from my job as a tour guide at the dynamite factory for saying the tour was gonna be lit
The new phrase to replace “I’ve got money to burn” is “I’ve got eggs to drop”
February 11, 2025 at 2:08 PM
The new phrase to replace “I’ve got money to burn” is “I’ve got eggs to drop”
Next year’s Super Bowl halftime performer should wear jorts
February 10, 2025 at 7:12 PM
Next year’s Super Bowl halftime performer should wear jorts
My daughter said if I got a low taper fade I’d look fire, and I just don’t remember talking to my parents like this
February 6, 2025 at 3:16 PM
My daughter said if I got a low taper fade I’d look fire, and I just don’t remember talking to my parents like this
Got fired from the HVAC company for singing “What’s cooler than being cool?” every time a customer called to say their furnace wasn’t working
February 5, 2025 at 6:34 PM
Got fired from the HVAC company for singing “What’s cooler than being cool?” every time a customer called to say their furnace wasn’t working
My gym is having a Valentine Dinner for couples, and something about taking my wife to the gym for Valentine’s Day feels kinda divorce-y
February 5, 2025 at 1:00 PM
My gym is having a Valentine Dinner for couples, and something about taking my wife to the gym for Valentine’s Day feels kinda divorce-y
Matthew McConaughey, not very excited about something:
Alright
Alright
February 4, 2025 at 12:49 PM
Matthew McConaughey, not very excited about something:
Alright
Alright
Saw a woman reading a book of poetry on the treadmill.
Just poetry in motion
Just poetry in motion
February 3, 2025 at 1:24 PM
Saw a woman reading a book of poetry on the treadmill.
Just poetry in motion
Just poetry in motion
Made it through Dry January! Haven’t had a shower all month
January 31, 2025 at 2:07 PM
Made it through Dry January! Haven’t had a shower all month
My blood type right now: G for gingerbread
December 17, 2024 at 1:04 PM
My blood type right now: G for gingerbread
I’ll be entering the witness protection program. I accidentally dried my hands with the Christmas towels
December 16, 2024 at 12:52 PM
I’ll be entering the witness protection program. I accidentally dried my hands with the Christmas towels
The real Christmas miracle would be if someone in this family besides me took out the recycling just once
December 15, 2024 at 1:51 PM
The real Christmas miracle would be if someone in this family besides me took out the recycling just once
A gingerbread house is much easier to decorate when you imagine it in a neighborhood with strict HOA guidelines
December 14, 2024 at 1:47 PM
A gingerbread house is much easier to decorate when you imagine it in a neighborhood with strict HOA guidelines
Nobody really talks about all the bird poop that would accumulate from the 12 Days of Christmas song
December 13, 2024 at 6:38 PM
Nobody really talks about all the bird poop that would accumulate from the 12 Days of Christmas song
I’m trying to have a holly jolly Christmas, but right now it’s pretty worky jerky
December 13, 2024 at 1:15 PM
I’m trying to have a holly jolly Christmas, but right now it’s pretty worky jerky