Matt :)
banner
mathieuwessel.bsky.social
Matt :)
@mathieuwessel.bsky.social
Many is the night I dream of cheese
I am rotating Ana de Armas in No Time to Die inside my head
January 29, 2026 at 2:04 PM
"Dig two graves"
Baby I'm gonna need a whole lot more than that
January 28, 2026 at 7:01 PM
Asking a 10 year old how my rizz was
Drunken Gregg good
January 27, 2026 at 10:33 AM
Local supermarket started carrying lao gan ma. Truly the Chinese century is upon us.
January 23, 2026 at 8:31 PM
I got a colleague who's really bad at his job and whenever he's not messing up he's just really unpleasant to everyone. Call that Mean Time Between Failures.
January 23, 2026 at 11:13 AM
You people don't even realize just how woke things are going to get
January 23, 2026 at 5:10 AM
"President Trump is alive and well on the plane to Davos after an electrical issue on Air Force One"
January 21, 2026 at 11:00 AM
Ngl keeping up this bit is insanely funny.
Senator Ted Cruz (R-Texas) was spotted earlier today, January 20, 2026, on a plane heading to Laguna Beach as the state of Texas braces for a rare ice threat and arctic cold front.
January 21, 2026 at 8:06 AM
My swag unconventional
January 21, 2026 at 8:02 AM
I have corn in my world
January 20, 2026 at 9:20 PM
Drunken Gregg good
January 20, 2026 at 3:12 PM
This guy's brain is definitely spongiform
TRUMP TELLS NBC NEWS "NORWAY TOTALLY CONTROLS IT DESPITE WHAT THEY SAY” OF THE NOBEL PEACE PRIZE COMPETITION
January 19, 2026 at 9:56 PM
Reposted by Matt :)
Comrade Mamdani has given us the activation code. Woke 2 is a go
January 18, 2026 at 11:35 PM
(trying to think of the term "rear projection") yeah in the next scene we're giving the actors backshots
January 16, 2026 at 4:04 PM
That drunk driving dril post is how I genuinely feel about artists doing cocaine.
January 15, 2026 at 7:18 AM
Whoever came up with "FutureSex/LoveSounds" really nailed it, that is what that album sounds like
January 15, 2026 at 7:14 AM
Be the cringe you want to see in the world
January 13, 2026 at 8:44 PM
Reese's Geeses
January 13, 2026 at 8:08 AM
My swiftie friend just asked me for song recommendations to "broaden her horizons". Nature is healing.
January 10, 2026 at 3:43 PM
His piss is red for an amazing reason
January 8, 2026 at 11:58 AM
Lord stop me from keeping this mustache
January 4, 2026 at 12:10 AM
"If you don't stop calling it slop, how are we gonna sell you all this slop we're producing?"
Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella says people should move beyond calling AI 'slop'

"We need to get beyond the arguments of slop vs sophistication and develop a new equilibrium ... that accounts for humans being equipped with these new cognitive amplifier tools as we relate to each other"
January 3, 2026 at 3:51 AM
2026 will be the year of loving your friends and maybe kissing the boys on the mouth
January 1, 2026 at 3:30 AM
"Sombr" sounds like a failing app startup for sensitive white boys
December 29, 2025 at 11:22 PM
What's she always lookin at up there?
December 27, 2025 at 10:29 AM