I’m at that age where how good your skincare routine is
=
how much of your face you can burn off at one time

Me to bookers/festivals: I'm sorry I don't have a tight five I have a slutty six-and-a-half.

Trump's Board of Peace plan for Gaza suggests it will place the region into a conservatorship and I'm going to need the #freebrittany crowd to circle the fuck up.

Used to think that Republicans did too much hero-worship of imperfect men.

Then I saw their #MLKDay posts and realized that "upholding Martin Luther King's legacy" is just cheating on their wives.

My flavor of OCD is, for how much marching he did, wanting MLK day to be in a couple months.

#mlk #martinlutherkingjr