Average alarm user: "erm, I wake up when my phone tells me too, I'm always on time, reddit bacon snoo!!"
The enlightening sun awakened: "I rise when the morning dawns, when the birds chorus in the trees, I rest when the frogs speak, I am one with the beings of land"
The enlightening sun awakened: "I rise when the morning dawns, when the birds chorus in the trees, I rest when the frogs speak, I am one with the beings of land"
June 19, 2025 at 3:05 AM
Average alarm user: "erm, I wake up when my phone tells me too, I'm always on time, reddit bacon snoo!!"
The enlightening sun awakened: "I rise when the morning dawns, when the birds chorus in the trees, I rest when the frogs speak, I am one with the beings of land"
The enlightening sun awakened: "I rise when the morning dawns, when the birds chorus in the trees, I rest when the frogs speak, I am one with the beings of land"
While you wallowed among the ground folk, I soared upon ancient wings to long forget temples of elysium
June 14, 2025 at 12:49 AM
While you wallowed among the ground folk, I soared upon ancient wings to long forget temples of elysium
I woke up alone in the goblin caves, but I knew how they think
June 8, 2025 at 11:37 AM
I woke up alone in the goblin caves, but I knew how they think
Was gonna use a navy seal breathing technique so I can sleep better but it requires a certain amount of war crimes to work
February 8, 2025 at 5:40 AM
Was gonna use a navy seal breathing technique so I can sleep better but it requires a certain amount of war crimes to work
People be like "omg so fun" ok dude I literally am beseeching anguish apon your clan, manor and bride
February 8, 2025 at 5:36 AM
People be like "omg so fun" ok dude I literally am beseeching anguish apon your clan, manor and bride
Thank God run the jewels has a career, who else is gonna add music to the tac commercials
February 5, 2025 at 8:20 PM
Thank God run the jewels has a career, who else is gonna add music to the tac commercials
I've been on my "piling up the dust" shit before the dust started piling up
January 28, 2025 at 5:27 AM
I've been on my "piling up the dust" shit before the dust started piling up
I made the perc 30
January 28, 2025 at 5:11 AM
I made the perc 30
Most magicians in the sanctum understand that you can't bring gremlins into the enchanter portal but Gorthvaz the Warlock keeps fucking up and the gremlin just vaporized in a nanosecond and then he expects the wizard college to pay for it, like dude you brought the gremlin summon, it's on you man.
January 27, 2025 at 3:37 AM
Most magicians in the sanctum understand that you can't bring gremlins into the enchanter portal but Gorthvaz the Warlock keeps fucking up and the gremlin just vaporized in a nanosecond and then he expects the wizard college to pay for it, like dude you brought the gremlin summon, it's on you man.
Walked into the club and it was a horse auction. I'm stuck buying this Morgan horse who's got worse teeth then a rock-chuck
January 27, 2025 at 3:27 AM
Walked into the club and it was a horse auction. I'm stuck buying this Morgan horse who's got worse teeth then a rock-chuck
Need a guy to pull up with me like it's a cross precinct investigation in an orange bomber jacket
January 24, 2025 at 2:23 AM
Need a guy to pull up with me like it's a cross precinct investigation in an orange bomber jacket
I'm not sure what to do now that I learned penis explosion magic, but I'm probably gonna blow some guys dick up
January 19, 2025 at 11:04 PM
I'm not sure what to do now that I learned penis explosion magic, but I'm probably gonna blow some guys dick up
You'd think I was earth shaking literature that way I keep breaking down her walls
January 19, 2025 at 2:23 AM
You'd think I was earth shaking literature that way I keep breaking down her walls
the elite gamer dad types are turnbased combat and map war game
if your father played a first person shooter you have no future
if your father played a first person shooter you have no future
January 12, 2025 at 5:36 AM
the elite gamer dad types are turnbased combat and map war game
if your father played a first person shooter you have no future
if your father played a first person shooter you have no future
gonna start blaming things on the "wrenched notions", see if that works
January 12, 2025 at 5:33 AM
gonna start blaming things on the "wrenched notions", see if that works
going through years of scientific work to land a job at the MLB being a synthetic-swamp-mud-ball research tech
January 12, 2025 at 5:32 AM
going through years of scientific work to land a job at the MLB being a synthetic-swamp-mud-ball research tech
mr.beast running recruitment for the US army is gonna be fantastic
in a decade we're gonna have iPad kids doing pay-of-pigs-esque water invasions
in a decade we're gonna have iPad kids doing pay-of-pigs-esque water invasions
January 12, 2025 at 5:29 AM
mr.beast running recruitment for the US army is gonna be fantastic
in a decade we're gonna have iPad kids doing pay-of-pigs-esque water invasions
in a decade we're gonna have iPad kids doing pay-of-pigs-esque water invasions
we need to find a way to get everyone who invests into crypto currency to just give me money.
Just right in my little hands, pronto
Just right in my little hands, pronto
January 12, 2025 at 5:24 AM
we need to find a way to get everyone who invests into crypto currency to just give me money.
Just right in my little hands, pronto
Just right in my little hands, pronto
someone should be that new type of guy who looks at stock photos of women in bikinis at the airport and leans over to the guy next to him and goes "wowza, I mean come on" and "this one's a looker".
Paid position, benefits, 401k
Paid position, benefits, 401k
January 12, 2025 at 5:22 AM
someone should be that new type of guy who looks at stock photos of women in bikinis at the airport and leans over to the guy next to him and goes "wowza, I mean come on" and "this one's a looker".
Paid position, benefits, 401k
Paid position, benefits, 401k
normal guy: I actually don't like slime that much it's ok
guy that REALLY likes being covered in slime: I actually think differently on this, I'm covered in slime
guy that REALLY likes being covered in slime: I actually think differently on this, I'm covered in slime
January 12, 2025 at 5:18 AM
normal guy: I actually don't like slime that much it's ok
guy that REALLY likes being covered in slime: I actually think differently on this, I'm covered in slime
guy that REALLY likes being covered in slime: I actually think differently on this, I'm covered in slime
Put the ops in a box and shipped them overseas like Nermal
January 9, 2025 at 2:24 AM
Put the ops in a box and shipped them overseas like Nermal
Horrible news in the dust dimension: less dust.
January 9, 2025 at 2:14 AM
Horrible news in the dust dimension: less dust.
Members only gremlin pit now taking applications
January 9, 2025 at 2:12 AM
Members only gremlin pit now taking applications
Wife installation was a grand success, now equipped with patio space, it's a game changer.
January 8, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Wife installation was a grand success, now equipped with patio space, it's a game changer.
They synthesized this mudslime in the Beakmans World laboratory
January 7, 2025 at 5:56 PM
They synthesized this mudslime in the Beakmans World laboratory