Those drone sightings that people have been spotting all across the US? Yeah, that's just me. You know the whole message in a bottle when you're stranded on an island? I'm sending messages to space because I'm stranded on Earth.

#takemewithyou #iwanttobelieve

I knew there was a reason Luigi was my favorite.

#yearofluigi #luigi

I hardly used Twitter, except for when I smoked some Oregon Maple Leaf ™️ and decided to make my stance known that lettuce is just crispy water. Thought it would be fitting to carry on the tradition with my war on lettuce.