EFFICIENCY

Rose thinks that when the mayor and city council
Sweep the homeless off the sidewalks
(It may be any day now)
That the scooper machine
Will drop them in the trash compactor
Along with the sleeping bags, backpacks
And torn shoes

OUR LITTLE JOKES

In the Old People’s Building,
We are not comedians, but
We have our little jokes.
One woman ask another,
“What does she look like?”
“Oh, she has white hair and glasses.”

SIX EYELINER TIPS FOR MATURE WOMEN

Let me make this clear.
You’re no longer
A spring chicken. No indeed.
Do you see those lines
At the corner of your eyes?
Wrinkles, my dear, pure and simple.

PRAYING FOR A DOLPHIN

Why did a group of Maori residents
Rush to a New Zealand shore to pray for
A disoriented dolphin? Because the
Dolphins are fragile in the
Tragedy of climate change
Because their similarity to humans
Was undeniable.

BLANKET GUY

Standing outside Safeway
Blanket Guy aka
The Streetcar Prophet
Is asking customers
To take his money.
“Do you need money
To buy groceries?”
He asks as he gives
His money away.

Virginia Lake

THIS IS NOT A SCAM, MA’AM

Oh how tiresome it is to be old
Targeted by slime balls
Trying to nail us
Pots of gold

How it hurts
To be on the alert
In the Age of Remote
Not forgetting
For one moment that emails
Come from
Sharks with no hearts

Virginia Lake

THIS IS NOT A SCAM, MA’AM

Oh how tiresome it is to be old
Targeted by slime balls
Trying to nail us
Pots of gold

How it hurts
To be on the alert
In the Age of Remote
Not forgetting
For one moment that emails
Come from
Sharks with no hearts

Virginia Lake

MY PHONE

My phone kindly tells me
How to remove
Ten years of wrinkles
Reduce belly fat
But my phone Is
A tad confused

It believes I
Live in Portland, Maine
Not Portland, Oregon
Dutifully it sends
The weather forecast
Fifteen inches
Of snow
Tomorrow

SINGING

The elderly Chinese women
Who live as I do
In this Old People’s Building
Have started singing
One brave soul in the elevator
Began all alone

Sang a song so sad
I needed no knowledge
Of Mandarin
To understand it.

EXISTENTIAL

Panhandler sign
At the Portland Farmers Market:
Do You Have Compassion?
In the Harry Kemelman mystery series
A rabbi is the detective.

A member of the congregation
Wants to know,
“Do you believe in God, Rabbi?”

“Some days I do.
Some days I don’t.”

.

THE SWEET POTATO

The sweet potato
sweetly misshapen,
Purple orange
scarlet brown
the soft flesh
a lump of deliciousness
Resembling the heart
the kidney, a lung
an egg
a gnome

REDHEAD

My grandmother often repeated
This redheaded story to me:
When I was three,
We were walking downtown together.

A man across the street
Hollered, “Hey Red!”
I replied,
“I’m not red
I’m Buhginya.”

Virginia Lake

PINGING

A thief stole an iPad
The iPad
Was discovered by police
Because it was pinging

If some wretch
Stole my mini
iPad
I would

Want
My little
iPad

To ping
And ping
For me

STREET SMART

This is how Gloria negotiates the
Five block walk from her building to the
Slabtown New Seasons Grocery Store

If the homeless mentally ill walking
Towards her pushing grocery carts
Are screamers
She crosses the street.

OVER

Louise was a little girl
Beginning school.

She remembered the day
Her Lincoln, Nebraska

Classmates jumped
Up and down
On the playground
Shouting

“The war is OVER.”
“The war is OVER.”

The date was November 11, 1918.
World War I had ended.

Shelter dog with a huge smile after being adopted.. 🥹

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