Leon Skum
@leonskum.bsky.social
Bluesky's #1 Steely Dan Fan 2023
Dave Chappelle (suddenly getting serious 50 minutes into a special): On November 30, 2025, Stacy Crystals, CFO of Red Ball Media Group, my friend, died. He fucking died.
December 3, 2025 at 11:03 PM
Dave Chappelle (suddenly getting serious 50 minutes into a special): On November 30, 2025, Stacy Crystals, CFO of Red Ball Media Group, my friend, died. He fucking died.
There was a quote in this same article from one of the characters. "I'm a cleaner, I feel no remorse when I see a dead body". My dad heard me say that while I played Medal of Homor Frontline, and I got grounded.
June 10, 2025 at 12:46 PM
There was a quote in this same article from one of the characters. "I'm a cleaner, I feel no remorse when I see a dead body". My dad heard me say that while I played Medal of Homor Frontline, and I got grounded.
Bobby Pin is my son, please show some respect. I'm Robert Pin
April 1, 2025 at 9:52 PM
Bobby Pin is my son, please show some respect. I'm Robert Pin
I love internet dating: part 4
July 6, 2024 at 1:07 AM
I love internet dating: part 4
Crazy how I went from telling coworkers "living the dream (want to kill myself)" to "living the dream (I'm fine)" in just 6 months.
Leave your job!!
Leave your job!!
June 6, 2024 at 1:42 PM
Crazy how I went from telling coworkers "living the dream (want to kill myself)" to "living the dream (I'm fine)" in just 6 months.
Leave your job!!
Leave your job!!
Met a local celebrity @heinzbeans.bsky.social
May 18, 2024 at 9:12 PM
Met a local celebrity @heinzbeans.bsky.social
*sees a bottle of spirolactone on his counter* holy shit dude, I mean girl, congrats on transitioning!
May 14, 2024 at 2:02 PM
*sees a bottle of spirolactone on his counter* holy shit dude, I mean girl, congrats on transitioning!
Hey girl I just opened up the "Popular with Friends" tab and it's just you?
May 11, 2024 at 12:15 AM
Hey girl I just opened up the "Popular with Friends" tab and it's just you?
Dropping the kids (zyn pods) off at the pool (my mouth)
May 10, 2024 at 10:42 PM
Dropping the kids (zyn pods) off at the pool (my mouth)
Accidentally looked into my front facing camera. #jumpscare
February 6, 2024 at 9:19 PM
Accidentally looked into my front facing camera. #jumpscare
Sliding up to the prettiest girl in the musical backstage to tell her "you know it's not pronounced 'hairy Kerry', but hara kiri"
January 18, 2024 at 3:51 PM
Sliding up to the prettiest girl in the musical backstage to tell her "you know it's not pronounced 'hairy Kerry', but hara kiri"
When you realize you've spent decades in the wrong body
January 10, 2024 at 5:49 PM
When you realize you've spent decades in the wrong body
I think society began to collapse when ribald and erotic scenarios no longer made the bowties of stuffy elites spin around going *wuhwuhwuhuwuhwuhWEE*
November 28, 2023 at 6:21 AM
I think society began to collapse when ribald and erotic scenarios no longer made the bowties of stuffy elites spin around going *wuhwuhwuhuwuhwuhWEE*
Day I don't even know of medical leave: I am now convinced that I have 0 talents. Like utterly incapable of anything. Bad at breathing, etc
November 26, 2023 at 7:32 AM
Day I don't even know of medical leave: I am now convinced that I have 0 talents. Like utterly incapable of anything. Bad at breathing, etc
I've had exactly one margarita and I've entered The Posting Zone. Legally Distinct from The Posting Hog Zone
November 23, 2023 at 5:24 AM
I've had exactly one margarita and I've entered The Posting Zone. Legally Distinct from The Posting Hog Zone
You date her, I ghostwrite her skeets.
We are not the same
We are not the same
November 23, 2023 at 5:19 AM
You date her, I ghostwrite her skeets.
We are not the same
We are not the same
It's gotta be so cool being friends with me, I'm obnoxious in a way that few other people can ever hope to match
November 23, 2023 at 5:03 AM
It's gotta be so cool being friends with me, I'm obnoxious in a way that few other people can ever hope to match
In an exciting development in my life, I have apparently developed an online dating stalker. Is this what it's like being an internet microcelebrity?
November 12, 2023 at 4:56 PM
In an exciting development in my life, I have apparently developed an online dating stalker. Is this what it's like being an internet microcelebrity?
My "I Should Buy a Piano" cycle goes as follows: Look for keyboard, determine weighted keyboards are too expensive, look up jazz piano videos on YouTube, decide "Oh I'll never be that good", quit looking, repeat.
November 6, 2023 at 4:52 AM
My "I Should Buy a Piano" cycle goes as follows: Look for keyboard, determine weighted keyboards are too expensive, look up jazz piano videos on YouTube, decide "Oh I'll never be that good", quit looking, repeat.
This just in, aides have whispered in Senator Feinstein's ears, and she has clarified that she is not in fact dead.
September 29, 2023 at 1:31 PM
This just in, aides have whispered in Senator Feinstein's ears, and she has clarified that she is not in fact dead.
Pulling the iconic move next weekend. Going to see a concert for an artist I've never heard before because my crush likes them and I wanna get close to her
September 16, 2023 at 11:31 PM
Pulling the iconic move next weekend. Going to see a concert for an artist I've never heard before because my crush likes them and I wanna get close to her
I love internet dating- BlueSky Edition
August 29, 2023 at 7:58 PM
I love internet dating- BlueSky Edition
The post-bar home beer is perhaps the strongest of spirits, and the most nourishing
August 27, 2023 at 5:08 AM
The post-bar home beer is perhaps the strongest of spirits, and the most nourishing
Having me for a friend means I'm distant when you're doing well, but the minute you're feeling down I am in your lap being like "how can I help? What's the problem? What do you mean why can't I put this energy into our relationship 24/7?"
August 27, 2023 at 5:07 AM
Having me for a friend means I'm distant when you're doing well, but the minute you're feeling down I am in your lap being like "how can I help? What's the problem? What do you mean why can't I put this energy into our relationship 24/7?"
Reposted by Leon Skum
Caught this goobert HUFFING the outdoor air coming in from the door and he turned around and looked at me like THIS.
August 27, 2023 at 4:02 AM
Caught this goobert HUFFING the outdoor air coming in from the door and he turned around and looked at me like THIS.