i go through phases where i feel like im a total npc, just too awkward, quiet, and lacking personality. i don’t even know if people notice this stuff about me and maybe they do but its not a big deal and they don’t mind, but idk, once those thoughts start i just can’t function

i’ve realized that i don’t really have self esteem. i only feel okay and good about myself when people who i think highly of assure me that they like me, invite me to smth, or just talk to me. i feel like im enough when i get that validation but on days when i’m alone i start to feel so sad